Looks Can Be Deceiving!
by legolascrazy17
Summary: As our lips met in a sizzling kiss, I sighed contentedly and leaned back into Ron's broad chest. I reckon it's going to be quite an interesting year. Little did I know, however, of a bimbo named Cassandra.. Sequel to Battle of the Hearts!
1. A Bimbo Named Cassandra

**Hey ya'll fans of Battle of the Hearts and new readers! This is the sequel to a Ron/Hermione humor/romance I jsut finished writing- Battle of the Hearts! Reading that would be helpful to get a background on this story, but it isn't completely neccessary. All right. A bit of information before you begin. This takes place in the 7th year. Ron and Hermione have been dating for a year (if you read Battle of the Hearts, they got together in the summer between fifth and sixth year!), as have Ginny and Harry. I hope you all really enjoy this chapter, cuz I had a lot of fun writing it! Like usual, read, review, and most importantly,HAVE FUN! Honest opinions are welcome! Readers of Battle of the Hearts, I sincerely hope I didn't disappoint you! Please let me know either way! Now I present to you Chapter One of...the SEQUEL you've all been itching for!**

* * *

"Well, well, well. It's Weasley and Granger," came the trademark drawl of the only bloke at Hogwarts able to be both unbelievably sexy and a ginormous pain in the buttocks simultaneously. I took in Draco's silky blonde hair, which fell attractively into his steel grey eyes, and his tall, lean, yet muscular build, which included perfect six-pack abs. Yep. I reckoned he still topped the list that Ginny and I had composed earlier in the summer entitled, "The Sexiest Blokes at Hogwarts." We had both grudgingly agreed that no matter how evil and Death Eater-wannabe Draco could be at times, he still edged Harry out for the top spot- but just barely. (Ron, unfortunately, could not even be considered, seeing as the vote had to be unanimous- Ginny had practically turned purple with suppressed laughter when I suggested her dear brother).

"I never thought you two pieces of low-lying scum would stay together for so long," he continued, sneering most ineloquently.

"You really can't do any better than that?" I asked lazily, still relishing the feel of Ron's large, warm, strong hand in mine, even after a year of dating.

"I find your lack of creativity quite amusing," Ginny chimed in, winking at Harry.

"It must be a result of hanging around your mate Voldemort too much. I hear he has little in the way of imagination," I snickered. Ron began to let out a snort but fortunately caught himself in time and covered it up with a suspicious-sounding cough. Over the past year, we had learned the hard way that Draco Malfoy took deep offense to anyone insulting that bastard of a wizard.

A malicious scowl crossed Draco's chiseled features, completely ruining the angelic perfection.

"How dare you utter the name of the Dark Lord from your filthy lips, Mudblood!" he said furiously, reaching into the pockets of his robes.

"Fear of a name only increases fear of the object itself," I smirked, snuggling as close to Ron as the plush seats of the Hogwarts Express would allow. After giving us an extremely dirty look and re-pocketing his wand when he realized that Death Eater or not, he was no match for four excellent duelers, the Slytherin Prefect (how in Merlin he still kept that position I do not know- I personally reckon that Dumbledore was under the influence of the Imperius Curse when he chose the Prefects from each house) stalked off to join his most unintelligent cronies.

"I reckon this will be quite an interesting year," Ginny sighed, playing with Harry's unruly black hair. I leaned back into Ron's chest and turned my head so his lips could gain access to mine more easily. "I reckon it will be," I agreed, as our lips met in a sizzling kiss.

* * *

"Bloody," Ron breathed. "Who is SHE?"

"Cassandra Valet," I said airily, taking a delicate sip of pumpkin juice and pointing to the slim witch who was striding confidently to the front of the Great Hall.

"Valet, Cassandra," Professor McGonagall called out as Cassandra, looking rather bored, sat down on the infamous three-legged stool and placed the raggedy Sorting Hat atop her tresses of jet-black, long curly hair that cascaded in shimmering waves over her shoulders. I watched her frosty-blue eyes flicker around the Great Hall with obvious disdain. Just what Hogwarts needed. Another ice princess.

"Gryffindor!" the hat yelled. Dear Merlin. Not only would I have to see that face day in and day out during classes, but the witch-who-had-captivated-the-whole-male-population-of-Hogwarts-in-three-seconds would be sleeping in MY dormitory at night.

"And it only gets better," I muttered under my breath as she took a seat RIGHT beside the Ron amidst wild applause and catcalling- coming from the Slytherins in particular.

Completely ignoring the fact that Professor Dumbledore was asking for silence in the hall so he could make his infamous Opening Speech, Cassandra stuck one perfectly manicured hand out to my redheaded bloke and said breathlessly with a thick French accent, "I'm Cassandra. May I ask as to what your name is?"

"Ronald Weasley," the-wizard-with-the-tips-of-his-ears-burning stammered, already dazzled by her flawless beauty. Never mind that there was a clever, witty witch sitting on the other side of him who just happened to be HIS GIRLFRIEND! However, I really couldn't blame Ron too much. I mean, he was obviously just being polite. As I had heard on the train from Parvati, Cassandra was a transfer student from another magical school in Europe. Beauxbatons, I believe. I had to look at it this way: if I had a sexy bloke from Beauxbatons introducing himself to me, there's no way in heck that I would completely ignore him just because my BOYFRIEND was sitting on the other side. I mean, honestly! I was going to give both the beauty and Ron the benefit of the doubt. At least for the next thirty seconds.

"Harry Potter," Harry grunted when she, I would say a little bit reluctantly, turned to the raven-haired, bespectacled wizard. Ha. At least one person was resisting her innumerable charms. But I was probably giving Harry too much credit. She obviously reminded him too much of Cho for him to give her a second glance.

"Hermione Granger," I said loudly, although she had not asked my name and probably wasn't planning on.

"Pleasure." The smile never left her face, but her eyes told it all. In the minute she had been sitting at our table, the obviously omnipotent witch had figured out Ron and I were dating. As she laid a hand on the dazed Ron's arm, I had a feeling that she had already sunk her claws in my poor, naïve bloke. And what would happen if it would come down to his bushy-haired bossy, boring girlfriend or a new, gorgeous, seductive transfer student? In the 2.4 minutes I had known Cassandra, I already smelled trouble. For Ron's one weakness was gorgeous, sexy, seductive girls. Such as Cassandra. I didn't stand a chance. I mean, look at how he acter around Fleur! Well, she was a veela. But that was besides the point.

* * *

"This room is perfectly DARLING!" Cassandra cooed as she entered the Gryffindor Common Room, clinging onto Ron. I had to stuff a wad of bushy, curly hair into my mouth to refrain from making a nasty remark. Unfortunately, it exited my lips anyways. "Hands off my boyfriend, _Cassandra_," I hissed through a mouthful of tangled hair, just loud enough for her to hear. She, of course completely ignored me, while Ron merely shot me a dirty glance.

"And look, Ronald! A cute little fireplace surrounded by squashy armchairs." She looked deep into his eyes. "You and I are going to spend a lot of time here together," she said huskily, rubbing his forearm and letting out a peal of laughter as he blushed madly.

I simply could not take it any longer.

"I am going to bed now," I announced stiffly, almost breaking into a run as I reached the familiar staircase to the seventh-year girls dormitory. Harry called out a "Night, "Mione," and Ron gave me a quick peck on the lips before returning his attention to the vivacious witch.

"I HATE HER!" I growled to Crookshanks, flopping ungracefully onto my bed. "She is the lowest, most awful creature to ever walk this planet!"

"Amen to that," Parvati said glumly, striding into the bedroom with Lavender hot on her heels. "I'd been saving this hot red miniskirt (she gestured to the tiny scrap of fabric visible through her open designer robes) just for today! And not even one bloke gave me a second glance! Their attention was focused on that...that..."

"Bimbo." I grimly supplied.

"You think you've got it bad," Lavender snapped, unpacking her trunk. "Seamus didn't even acknowledge my presence at the feast!"

"I really hate to top you two," I grumbled, "But the ice princess has her claws in MY RON!"

Lavender and Parvati looked positively infuriated. I'd never fully appreciated until that moment that the two had been my roommates for the past five years- perhaps not always friends (I can stand only so much of their incessant chatter about superficial topics), but they still know me fairly well-especially concerning my deep love for a certain redheaded wizard.

"Girls," Parvati shook her head thoughtfully, "we will have to put aside our differences and do something about "Cass-Ass." I giggled despite myself at her appropriate nickname. "I for one will not endure a whole year of her flawless skin, model-figure, beautiful wavy black hair, crystal eyes, and her ability to seduce all the male wizards in Hogwarts in three seconds. "

"Jealous, ladies?" Cassandra asked breezily, as we all jumped at the sudden sound of her voice.

"Oh yeah, we're jealous. We're really jealous!" I said sarcastically. "We've always yearned to be a brainless bimbo- like YOU!"

Her perfectly white smirk only widened.

"Didn't you girls hear?" she feigned shock. "I was top in my year at Beauxbatons for the past six years!"

"Then why don't you just go back there?" Lavender suggested helpfully through gritted teeth as she loaded her blouses into an empty bureau drawer.

Cassandra waved a hand impatiently.

"Ladies, I was not finished! I was also the star Seeker on my house's team for four straight years!" It's a bloody shame that you never took a rogue Bludger to the head, my dear.

My seldomly seen wicked temper was very quickly beginning to emerge.

"Cleary, Cassandra," I began sweetly, "You forget that you are in the presence of three 16-year old witches who know more spells than your pea-sized brain can comprehend."

"You are all sixteen?" two perfectly shaped eyebrows were raised. "Could've fooled me." Her eyes traveled over my nearly flat chest.

"Listen, Bimbo Barbie," Parvati literally growled, "Hermione is cleverer than you will ever be and could easily hex you into oblivion in mere seconds if she chose to."

"Oh, really? How many OWLs did you receive, bookworm?" Hmmph. That bimbo had another one coming if she thought she could get away with calling ME a bookworm. Perhaps I enjoy reading more than the next witch does, but that surely does not merit a nasty name such as that!

"Twelve, C**_ASS_**andra."

A snort. "Pity. I got thirteen. That crackpot fool of a headmaster obviously doesn't know how to run this school."

I whipped out my wand. "Never, ever, ever insult Dumbledore in front of me," I said in a deathly whisper. The damn witch pretended that she hadn't heard me and continued.

"So, who's the Seeker on the Gryffindor Quidditch team?" came her muffled voice as she pulled off her blouse to change into nightclothes, revealing a perfectly flat stomach, a tiny waist, and a humongous chest- all of which any of the three of us would've killed for. Especially if it meant murdering the owner of the perfect body with our bare hands.

"That would be Harry. Harry Potter. You met him. Or perhaps you were too busy drooling over Ron to notice?"

"Is he any good?"

Parvati, Lavender, and I immediately shrieked in laughter. "Harry is the most brilliant Seeker Hogwarts has seen for years. He's never lost a game," Parvati stretched the truth a bit.

"Well, I'm sure I can beat him," the Ice Princess said arrogantly, slipping on a deep red, silky nightgown.

My nostrils flared. "To the contrary, I'm sure you can't," I said coolly.

"We'll just see about that," she smirked confidently. Then her expression changed to one of pure adoration. "Oh, that Ronald Weasley! He's a complete doll! What do you know about him?"

We all stared at her. "He just happens to have been my best mate for the past seven years. And my boyfriend since the summer before our sixth year. I know him very intimately."

Her eyes widened. "Intimately?" she said incredulously.

"Do I need to define the word for you?" I sniggered.

"I find it hard to believe that he would shag the likes of you."

"We didn't shag," I snarled through gritted teeth. "Although your one-sided mind may not be able to comprehend this, it is possible to share a deep, intimate friendship with a wizard without taking your clothes off."

She giggled. Obviously, absistence was not something she practiced.

"Well, I'll have you know right now that I rather fancy the cute bloke."

"Well, I'll have you know right now that Hermione has fancied the bloke for the past five years and is currently dating him," Parvati retorted.

"She has? Well, obviously he is getting rather bored with her, for he was sure as hell making eyes at me during the feast! In fact, I could've sworn I felt him squeeze my thigh."

I choked back a snort. Ron was many things, but bold, seductive, and "handsy" were not included in the list.

"Obviously you are wrong."

"Obviously I am right. And, Hermione" she looked at me straight in the eye- "I have no intention of moving my interests elsewhere just because my roommate has a silly, meaningless relationship with the bloke I like. May the best witch win- and of course, we all know who that is!" With a final look of utter contempt, she disappeared behind her bed hangings for the night.

"Emergency meeting on my bed. Now!" Lavender whispered as we all sprinted over to the other side of the room, leaped onto her bed, sealing the bed hangings shut and casting a Silencing Charm.

There was complete and total silence.

"That girl is a MONSTER!" I finally screamed through tears of anger and frustration.

Parvati patted me on the back sympathetically. "We know she is, Hermione. However, you aren't alone in this war. We are a team now- united together to fight for the same cause."

"But what are we going to do?" I wailed despondently. Then, suddenly inspiration hit me as I remembered the only bloke in Hogwarts who was immune to her innumerable charms.

"Harry."

* * *

Two hours later, when we were sure that the whole house was fast asleep, I found myself sneaking in the 6th year boy's dormitory, Parvati's instructions echoing in my ears. "_Wake him up, and tell him to meet us in the Common Room with that Invisibility Cloak of his."_ Godric knows how she is aware of that particular valuable possession of Harry's...

"Harry! Pssst, Harry!" I whispered.

"Hermione?" he whispered groggily.

"Get your Invisibility Cloak and follow me NOW!" I instructed harshly, leaving no room for argument. Sensing the urgency in my voice, he quickly crawled out of bed, and made a quick detour on his way to the door to retrieve the cloak from the secret compartment in the bottom of his trunk.

"What's wrong?" he asked, bewildered, as Parvati and Lavender came into view, both sitting stiffly on armchairs near the leftover glowing embers from the night's once-roaring fire.

"Plenty," I said crossly, my two roommates' delighted expressions at seeing Harry without a shirt on (those sexy abs of his...OOOWOOW!) failing to amuse me. "You better make yourself comfortable, Harry. And if anyone comes down, throw the cloak over yourself."

* * *

"Let me get this straight- you believe this witch is a spawn of Satan?"

"Yes," I said earnestly, my eyes desperately begging him to believe me. "You saw her Harry- pouncing on Ron and wooing the whole male population of Hogwarts! And then, as we just finished telling you, insulting everything from Dumbledore to your Quidditch skills back in the dormitory!"

"She is a very attractive girl," Harry admitted fairly, slouching in his chair.

"That is beside the point!" I hissed. Eyes beginning to fill with tears, I said in a very small voice, "Harry- she's a menace to Hogwarts! She's trying to steal Ron from me!"

"All right, all right," Harry said exasperatedly, propping his head up with his hands. "From what I've seen, she doesn't seem to have a very endearing personality."

"Your best mate thinks so," I sniffed.

Harry rolled his eyes. "Ron is daft," he sighed. "But then again, so am I. And let me tell you, if I had a sexy witch like Cassandra (my cough sounded suspiciously like "Cho!") throwing herself at me, I would have difficulty resisting her charm."

"But Ron," I pointed out, "Is my boyfriend. I do think he would have the sense not to eye up other girls when _I_ am around!"

"Your eyes never land on any other blokes?"

Hmmph. He had me there. "But I don't fratrenize with them for large amounts of time!"

"Give Ron a break, Hermione. She's a new student. He's just being friendly. Ron loves you, 'Mione. He is just in awe of Cassandra. It'll pass in a few days."

Riiiiiggghtt. I asked a question that had been bothering me since the speech.

"If all the blokes at Hogwarts are falling ove themselve for her, then why aren't you affected by her?"

His brow furrowed. "I dunno. I reckon something just doesn't seem right about her- it's probably nothing serious. Just a feeling I have."

"Well, thanks anyways," I muttered unhappily as I rose to my feet, Parvati and Lavender following suit. "We'll be heading back to bed now."

"Good night," he said quietly, staring at the floor.

"Well, he did help a little," Lavender said optimistically.

"But I'm afraid it's not enough," I finished dismally.

"The world will look a lot better after a good night's rest," Parvati said firmly, taking me by the arm and quietly opening the door to our dormitory As she did, I caught a flash of red hair. What was Ron doing in our dormitory at 1:00 at night? My question was answered immediately as we caught sight of Cass-Ass and the object of my affections, standing in VERY close proximity to each other. In fact, it looked like they were about to begin snogging! GRRR. That bimbo had another coming if she thought she could just simply waltz into Hogwarts and steal MY BOYFRIEND!

* * *

Like it? Hate it? Opinions, please! 


	2. The New Draco Malfoy

**(Giggles!). Oh, ye of little faith for Ronald Weasley! Do you really think that Hermione will lose him that easily? (cackles!) One can never tell, I reckon...Well, I would really like to thank those 62 wonderful reviewers who left very encouraging, fantastic compliments and comments on this story! A ginormous thank-you to: One With A Constant Sugar High, Miss Court-A-Doo,Vague Angel, Dany Granger Weasley, Arnostae, dancerrdw, EWlookalike, Mrz.Potter, Avantara, somemoonlitnite, cathyrock, EponineWeasley, aishteru, LyssaGranger, TheDaughterOfKings, Ronsreallove, summerxkiss2, sailorstarryeyes, SilentRaven987, astraeos, Elemental Water Mistress, amrawo, kitotterkat, aurorasakura16, I AM EOWYN, silktophat, Lara Potter, Alli-Baby, Loku, Emma-Lynn, suckr4romance, Pauly, Fairy Princess, georgia xx, Syd, dreamchubb, hot4scott68, Tria Marie Val, LadySimone123, fredngeorgegirl, Rupertlover 14, FairyPrincess, RainDateChick, Lucy the Rat, ShadowHexx771, milky way bar, xOx-Mystique-xOx, RubyPhoenixFire, lacatamar, Bloody Corsets, cherry blossom, KK, Endless Potential, mAlFoYiSaWeSoMe, waterfaerie15, FionaFlamingo, goblin monkey, Lost in Land, Jerry, rachyluvsgrin112, Lady Smoothie, and last, but definitely not least, MyOnlyCat. Thanks so much, you fellow readers and authors! Now I present to you Chapter 2. Read, and review, and above all esle, ENJOY!**

* * *

"What the heck do you think you're doing?" I sputtered. With a flick of her wand, Ron disappeared. I gaped. "And what the heck did you just do with MY boyfriend?"

"I'm just practicing," Cassandra said breezily, laying her wand on her bedside table and stretching out on her long, lithe body with all the grace of a jungle cat on her purple velvety bedspread.

I could scarcely keep a hint of admiration out of my voice as it finally clicked. "That's the—"

"­­­­­­­­­­­­­­Pseudohominis spell," Cassandra yawned. (**A/N: Pseudo means "fake," and hominis is "man").** "I've been able to do that for ages!"

"No way," I breathed.

"Er, excuse me for interrupting," Parvati said loudly, "But what the bloody is the Pseudohominis spell?"

"It's an extremely advanced form of magic," I began, sounding as usual, as though I was reciting my words from a textbook. "A skilled witch or wizard, after many years of practice, can conjure a 3-D image of a person of their choice. Mind you, it's just an image- it can't move, talk, or do anything of significance. A shadow of that person, really. However, from far away it can easily be mistaken as the real person." My eyes narrowed. "It's a very hard spell to complete. And it's as close to Dark Magic as you can get without being illegal."

"It's very easy, really," Cassandra interrupted smoothly in a bored tone. "I just fiercely concentrate on a person in my mind, utter the incantation, and then, voila!"

"Well, aren't you special," Lavender snorted.

"Wherever did you learn that?" I peered at her suspiciously.

"Like I informed you before, Hermione, they teach us well at Beauxbatons," she replied, more than a little bit smugly.

"Why Ron?" I snapped.

She let out a delicate, yet exasperated sigh. "Because I fancy the wizard, bookworm. Haven't we been through this already? I also thought it would be quiet amusing to see the expression on your face when you saw "Ron" and I. Together. In the dormitory. At 1 AM at night."

"Your poor sense of humor is laughable," I sneered to her disappearing figure as she pulled her bed-hangings shut. As her breathing became slow and even, the three of us let out an enormous sigh of relief.

"A brief reprieve," I cried dramatically, "From the terrors of the spawn of Satan."

"You have absolutely got to be kidding me," Lavender groaned. "We'll have to spend a WHOLE year with Miss Perfect?"

"That's my nickname," I grumbled.

For some strange reason, Parvati began giggling.

"What's so funny?" I asked peevishly, pulling my bush back into a ponytail to allow for a "no-hair-balls-in-my-mouth" night. Between unladylike snorts, she managed to gasp, "I was just imagining Professor Snape's reaction to Bimbo Barbie. And Professor McGonagall! They'll see right through her."

A small grin began to slowly cross my irate face. I snickered right along with her. Tomorrow would be quite amusing.

* * *

"Parvati, turn your radio off RIGHT NOW!" I groaned in a muffled voice into my fluffy white pillow at exactly 5:35 AM the next morning. 

"You of all people should know, Hermione," Parvati said sleepily, "That electronics can not function in Hogwarts."

We all listened closely to the beautiful, rich soprano voice singing some sort of Italian opera.

"It's coming from the bathroom," I whispered.

Lavender rubbed her eyes groggily. "Honestly," she yawned, "I didn't think you two were that daft! That's Cass-Ass, singing her heart out in the shower!"

"At 5:35 AM in the morning?" I asked incredulously, trying desperately to ignore the fact that along with everything else, Cassandra was an extremely talented singer.

"I reckon it take some people like her an awful long time to beautify themselves for the day," Lavender snickered.

* * *

"Bacon, Hermione?" 

"No thanks," I snapped. "I've rather just lost my appetite." Harry followed my gaze to the slim witch who was walking sultry into the Great Hall, hips swinging back and forth, much to the delight of 99 percent of the wizards.

"Oh," my best mate patted my arm sympathetically and quickly sprang out of his seat across from Ron and I, sprinted around the end of the table, and landed breathlessly in an ungraceful heap on the other side of Ron.

"I was going to sit there," Cassandra pouted, as Ron's eyes traveled from her long, lean legs visible underneath a short black miniskirt to her skin-tight cream blouse. Her robes, I noted, were nowhere to be found.

"Well, I reckon you'll have to change your plans a bit," Harry smiled angelically as Ron shot him a dirty glance.

"Knock it off, Harry," my boyfriend hissed through clenched teeth.

Cass-Ass sighed as though this was the most difficult action she had ever had to perform in her entire perfect life and perched on the bench across the table from Ron.

"Perhaps Professor McGonagall wasn't clear to you," I said sweetly as her frosty blue eyes flickered over me with obvious disdain. "Robes are to be worn at all times in public places- including meals!"

"She did?" Cassandra raised an eyebrow in an expression of perfect innocence. "I must have missed that tidbit of information. I'm a trifle deaf in one ear, you know. Well, I figured if you have an excellent figure, why cover it up in those awful robes?"

"It's a school policy," I sneered. "One you would do good to follow or else you'll find yourself in detention before you can say, "Wingardium Leviosa!"

"For some of you girls," she smirked, "It isn't a sacrifice at all to cover up those figureless bodies." Hmmphh. Well, excusez-moi if my chest hasn't grown since the third year!

"I really admire you, Cassandra," I said sarcastically. "Adjusting to a whole new school with such ease, _and thinking you can just waltz right in and steal MY boyfriend!"_ I added in the quietest of whispers that only she could hear.

"Who said anything about stealing?" the beautiful witch shrugged and flipped her long, silky black hair over one shoulder. "I sure as heck don't see HIM putting up any resistance to my advances."

"Why, you little slu..."

"Schedules are here!" Harry said loudly as Professor McGonagall handed me a crisp white sheet of parchment.

"Oh look, we have every single class together!" Cassandra beamed after leaning across the table so she was practically falling out of her low-cut blouse and comparing schedules with Ron's and mine.

"I look forward to it," I muttered under my breath. "Bacon, Cassandra?"

"Oh, I'm not hungry." She let out a tinkling laugh. "I have a very delicate appetite."

"No wonder you're so slim," I snorted. "You starve yourself. That's isn't very healthy, is it?"

"It's an example you would do good to follow sometimes," Ron said through a mouthful of kippers.

"EXCUSE ME?"

"Hermione has a very large appetite," he explained to the b-with-an-itch-of-a-witch-trying-to-seduce-the-object-of-my-affections. "Honestly, she frequently devours at least half of the table's contents! Eating a little less food would be good for her!"

"You should talk," I snarled, grabbing my bag and hopping up out of my seat. I leaned over and gave Ron a quick kiss, which he responded only half-heartedly to.

"Where are you going, Hermione?" Cassandra called as I practically ran away from the Gryffindor table.

"Library!" I yelled back, throwing my most dirty glance that I reserve for such ginormous prats as Malfoy her way. Speaking of whom..."

"The sight of Weasley drooling over Cassandra a bit too much for you, eh Granger?"

" Sod off, Malfoy. Trust me, you DO Not want to mess with me right now," I growled as he fell in step with me.

"But I have to tell you something I think you would find comforting," he drawled, dragging me into a secluded corner.

"Let me GO!" I struggled against his muscular arms that held me 2.6 inches away from his toned, sexy body.

"I'm not going to do anything to you of a sexual nature," Draco said calmly, as I searched hastily for my wand. "That is, unless you want me to." I shivered, despite myself, at his suggestive manner. Draco was as sexy and drop-dead gorgeous as they came-and I'd heard he was excellent in the snogging department. There was just that little problem of him possibly being a Death Eater and one of the most evil, obnoxious blokes to ever walk through Hogwarts...

"Get to the point, Malfoy." I put my hands on my non-existent hips. (I really don't understand how I weigh that much- I have no hips, chest, or butt, but somehow a good two pounds for every inch of my height (I'm 5 ft 4 inches tall, and weigh 128 pounds!)).

His icy gray eyes bore straight into mine. "I don't like Cassandra at all," he said seriously.

My eyes widened. Then I remembered whom I was talking to.

"Well, that shouldn't come as any great surprise," I scoffed. "You do tend to have a strange taste in witches. Take Pansy, for example..."

Draco winced. "I honestly don't fancy Pansy," he sighed. "She's the most obnoxious, evil, ugly witch at Hogwarts!"

"Why don't you like Cassandra?" I asked, very curious despite myself.

I thought he would make a "Malfoy flippant remark" such as "I like my girls juicier" or "I like to be the one who seduces the girl, and not the other way around." However, he was dead serious.

"She's a huge flirt. She's sexy and she knows it. She is all my two best mates- and any Slytherin male -will talk about anymore. She is arrogant, cold, and superficial."

"Seems like the exact description of the bimbos you pursue," I said a tad bit too nastily.

Draco shook his head of attractive blonde hair. "Not any longer, Granger."

I gaped. What in Merlin was wrong with Draco Malfoy? He was acting so- **_NICE!_**

"Here's the deal." He got down to business. "I don't like Cassandra. You don't like Cassandra. Cassandra is trying to seduce Ron. I don't like Ron. You love him. I would love for the opportunity to make a ginormous fool out of that little sl--, and make smoke come out of Weaslye's ears. I can help you," he finished simply.

My suspicious were definitely raised. "And I should trust you?" I laughed. "You, a Death Eater, an obnoxious, arrogant prat.." I was silenced by Draco's very close proximity.

"I am not a Death Eater." His breath tickled my ear as I shivered once again. "Even ask Dumbledore."

"Oh, right," I sniggered. "Like I really believe that."

"He's telling the truth, Miss Granger," Professor Dumbledore said quietly as he suddenly appeared two feet away from us.

"You both are wacko," I shook my head. "There is no way in Merlin that Draco has come to the side of good."

"He has, Miss Granger," Professor Dumbledore said lightly, blue eyes twinkling behind his spectacles. "Now if you two will excuse me, I have some matters of business to attend to before classes begin."

"Now do you believe me?" Draco questioned.

"I reckon I do, Draco," I sighed, eyes widening as I realized that I hadaddressed my nemesis by his first name!

"So, Hermione, shall we shake on it?" He held out a pale hand, callused from many years of playing Quidditch.

"Deal," I sighed.

Still holding my hand, Draco outlined his plan. "I will do my very best to seduce Cassandra. With looks my mine, that shouldn't be too hard. Even if she is infatuated with Weasley."

"Then?"

"Then I will completely mortify her in some manner. Weasley will be furious that I stole her away from him in the first place, Cassandra will be embarrassed beyond relief, and you will have your boyfriend back."

I hesitated. "That could really backfire, you know." After all, I was practically putting my relationship with Ron into DRACO MALFOY'S HANDS! "She could just run straight back to Ron! And he'll despise you even more than he already does! And if he ever finds out that we're working together..."

"Do you want to lose your boyfriend?"

"No."

"Then you'll have to trust me," the sexy bloke said grimly. "Because there's more at stake here than your relationship with Ron."


	3. I am NOT going to SHAG Ron!

**Howdy, folks! First off, I'd like to thank the follow 49 reviewers who left such kind comments on Chapter 2! A huge thank-you goes to: TheDaughterOfKings, lacatmar, Alli-Baby, AmyChris, ShadowHexx771, hrrypttrfan, Huggles4All, milky way bar, Loku, Fairy Princess, amrawo, N.C. PysChick, unknownspecies, NicciBubbles, Elemental Water Mistress, NinademiBrooke, goblinmonkey, RubyPhoenixFire, GreenEyes, aurorasakura16, Bella, Emma-Lynn, sailorstarryeyes, sakura, i-luv-fanfiction, Ihateharryandhermioneshippers, mashednanners, edc,Bloody Corsets, xox.Annie Potter.xox., waterfaerie15, xOx-Mystique-xOx, dancerrdw, Endless Potential, cathyrock, I AM EOWYN, suckr4romance, One With A Constant Sugar High, silktophat, Ayantara, Rupertlover14, EponineWeasley, aishteru, God Almighty, LyssaGranger, SilentRaven897, and last, but definitely not least, mAlFoYiSaWeSoMe! THANKS YA"LL!**

**I have realized something about this fiction. It isn't going to have the exact same tone as Battle of the Hearts, which was basically mindless fluff and constant humor. This story actually has a plot and will be quite serious at times. I will try to keep it light and witty when I can, but I am forewarning you. I just wanted to bring this up..I guess for peace of mind. I'm a little disappointed in the way this fiction's going so far-truthful opinions anyone? I now present to you Chapter 3- read, review if you think it worthy to, and above all else, ENJOY, ENJOY, ENJOY!**

* * *

I furrowed my brow. 

"What?"

"If I told you, I'd have to kill you," Draco drawled silkily. He impatiently brushed the unruly lock of blonde hair that was hanging attractively in his steely grey eyes out of the way. I gaped as I caught a flash of his hand. His fingernails were in an absolutely pristine condition...filed to a perfect point...

"Do you get manicures?" I blabbed before I realized just exactly what I was saying.

"Yes, I do," Draco sniffed. "It's a must if you want to be a Malfoy."

I simply could not help it. I snorted- VERY loudly. So obnoxiously, that Terry Boot, who was sauntering past on his way to a snog session with Padma, glanced over to our private little corner suspiciously.

"You filthy little Mudblood!" Draco suddenly hissed like a snake. "You and your bloody Weasley..." It worked. Terry didn't bat an eyelash. He assumed it was just a typical Draco/Hermione argument, one that occured about five times a day. Nothing out of the ordinary.

"At least I don't get manicures." I cackled with glee once Terry was out of earshot.

"Sod off," the sexy Slytherin grumbled, pulling me even deeper into the shadows. "Or else I'm afraid I'll be forced to snog the hell out of your mouth in an effort to keep it from ever opening again." Teehee. As delightful as that sounded, Potions was due to start in five minutes, and Snape would delight in delving out a punishment to one of his least favorite students- me.

"As interesting as this conversation is," I fake yawned, "I don't wish to receive detention on my first day at Hogwarts."

He completely ignored me. "Now, continuing with the plan...We can't be seen actually enjoying each other's company. I'll have to still continue being a huge pain in the buttocks to both you and the other two members of your precious Golden Trio. We'll have to meet in secret places at ungodly hours of the night...Merlin only knows what the consequences would be if certain people saw us together..."

"Will you please stop being so cryptical?" I snapped.

"I know this will be terribly difficult for you, but please try to contain your curiosity and don't ask any questions?"

"Fine." I said grudgingly.

"Or else I will have to resort to the snogging..."

* * *

"Tut tut. Miss Granger, late to her first NEWTs Potions class," Professor Snape said with obvious glee. "I'm afraid that will have to be a detention. Seven o'clock sharp in my office tonight, Miss Granger. And I believe twenty points from Gryffindor would be just about right?" 

"Make it thirty, Professor," Draco drawled from the other side of the room.

"Excellent idea, Mr. Malfoy." Hmmph. My newly- found ally was definitely withholding his trademark reputation. No one would EVER suspect a thing.

"Now, as we were discussing before Miss Granger ever so rudely interrupted the class with her tardiness, we will be extensively studying the complicated healing potions for a good deal of the year. Can anyone name the two most basic ones?"

My hand was in the air the second the word "ones" left Snape's greasy mouth.

"Miss Valet?"

"The Blood Replenishing potion and the Wound Healing potion," Cassandra said primly, tossing her head of glossy black hair.

"Excellent, Miss Valet. Ten points to Gryffindor."

I opened my mouth in disbelief. Snape never, ever gave any points to Gryffindor in the whole five years I'd been at Hogwarts...

"I have the feeling that Snape doesn't see right through her," I confided in a low voice to Parvati, who looked as though there was dragon dung underneath her nose. "Either that, or he's finding pleasure in watching the smoke come out of our ears."

"Professor Snape doesn't see a lot of things," she pointed out wisely. "Especially the fact that your hand was in the air long before hers was, and yet, he called on that bimbo!"

"I knew that answer," I practically whined. "I know every answer in Potions. And yet, he asked that 'ass of a Cass'!"

"Well, Miss Granger, if you do honestly believe that you are omnipotent, then by all means answer this question: What gives you and Miss Patil the right to carry on a conversation in the middle of a class while I AM TEACHING?"

"I was just asking Hermione for a quill, sir." Parvati made her best attempt to look innocent.

"Tell me, why would you need a quill, Miss Patil? I did not indicate that we were taking notes at this time."

"I just wanted to be prepared." The beautiful witch shrugged her slim shoulders nonchalantly and picked a nonexistent piece of fluff off her tight robes.

"A likely story," Snape sneered. With a swish of the robes, he turned to face me. "And Miss Granger, this is the second time you have showed unacceptable behavior in my class. Another twenty points will be taken from Gryffindor and I'm afraid you'll be receiving another detention."

"That's an outrage, sir!" Ron was on his feet in a second, face red with barely-concealed fury. Teehee. The object of my affections was DEFENDING ME! Perhaps the situation wasn't as dire as I had thought...

"Sit down, Mr. Weasley," the slimy head of Slytherin said silkily.

"No, I don't think I'm going to," Ron said arrogantly, blatantly defying Snape's command.

"Ronald, dear," Cassandra said soothingly, covering his fist-currently-clenching-the-edge-of-the-table with her petite hand, "Please take a seat." Ron, bless his little heart, completely ignored her.

"Mr. Weasley, would you care to join Miss Granger in detention tonight?"

I waited with bated breath.

"Yes, _sir_, I would."

Frankly, the whole class was in a bit of awe. Ron had lost his temper with Snape at many memorable times in past years, but never to this extent!

"Well, Mr. Weasley, you have your wish. For your inexcusable disrespect to me, both you and Miss Granger will be spending a week in detention."

I gulped. "A week? But, Professor, that's- "

"Ridiculous," Ron finished firmly.

"Miss Granger, what are the ingredients in a Wit-Sharpening Potion?"

"Scarab beetle, ginger roots, and armadillo bile," I recited dully.

"Correct. Now, seeing as you know the ingredients, it would do you good to brew the potion in the hopes that next time you will be able to use your WITS before disrupting MY class again. Have I made myself clear, Miss Granger?"

"Certainly, Professor." I couldn't help but smirking.

"Another ten points off Gryffindor for that conceited smile..."

* * *

"I lost 60 bloody points for Gryffindor in Potions," I informed Ginny during lunch. 

Her eyes lit up as she swallowed her treacle tart hastily. "I am SO proud of you, Hermione!" she squealed. "You're finally letting the rebellious side in you emerge! Oi, Ron!" Ginny tapped her older brother on his broad shoulder. "Hermione has finally come in touch with her inner bad girl!"

"Really?" Ron raised an orange eyebrow. "Then, bloody hell, doing rounds tonight should be quite interesting!"

"We have detention, Ron." I reminded him with disappointment, my mind already whirling off with fantasties involved me, Ron, and that secluded little corner behind the statue of Egret the Embarrassed.

"Well, afterwards, then?"

"Your room or mine?" Harry spit out the pumpkin juice he had just sipped, showering Parvati and Lavender with the liquid contents of his mouth as he stared at us.

"You've both gone bloody mad," Harry shook his head.

"Nope. Tonight Ron and I are going to shag!" I cried triumphantly. Only it was a bit on the loud side. And I had chosen one of those extremely rare moments when the Great Hall had fallen into a short silence. Now not only was the Boy-Who-Lived pondering if I'd lost my mind, but so was the rest of the Gryffindor table, half the Hufflepuffs, and even few Slytherins- all of whom had heard my rather dirty last remark. Oh, and I couldn't forget the professors- and Ron, the latter of which who was giving me this rather odd expression- one that was making delicious tingles race up and down my spine...

"You've got to be kidding me, Hermione," Dean broke the silence and shook his head in disbelief. "You and Ron- SHAGGING?"

"Is there anything wrong with that?" I said rather defensively, wishing that everyone would STOP LOOKING AT ME!

"It's just a very disturbing image," Seamus chimed in.

"Then don't imagine it, Finnigan," Ron said briskly, flashing me his infamous lazy grin.

"Yes, please don't," I agreed. "I don't think that Ron has a body that's very appealing to men..."

All the blood suddenly rushed out of Harry's face as he pointed a shaking finger at something behind me. I turned around every so slowly. Ah. Just the people who could make the situation even better. Professor McGonagall and Cass-Ass. The whole reason that Ron had actually been paying attention to me at lunch and not drooling over that bimbo's large expanses of revealed skin was because she had to meet with McGonagall to see where she stood in Transfiguration- if Potions and Charms were any indication, it was, most unfortunately, bloody brilliant. But alas, the hour of peace had been shattered. Reality set back in, and once again I would be fighting the Ice Princess for Ronald Weasley.

"Miss Granger and Mr. Weasley, follow me please." The older witch beckoned as she adjusted her hat in order that it would continue to sit primly and sternly on her tight-bunned head.

Ron and I shared a look of utter panic.

"What's wrong, Professor?" I asked shakily.

"Plenty. Now, please don't tarry, you two. I must speak with you both before lunch is over, which will be in approximately ten minutes."

I entered her office with a heavy heart. It had suddenly clicked with me. She was going to give us the whole "no shagging before marriage talk" as she had done to Seamus and Lavender at one time in the fifth year. (Thank Merlin, they weren't actually shagging- it was just a RUMOR!)

"Er, Professor," I began quickly as Ron and I took sat down stiffly in the high-backed royal blue chairs across from her organized desk, "Ron and I really weren't planning on shagging. It was just a joke."

"That's good to know, Miss Granger," Professor McGonagall said without batting an eyelash, but I could see the beginnings of a smile work its way to her stern, set lips. "However, that is not what I wish to discuss with you and Mr. Weasley. And let me assure you, if you two were ever to do anything of that like here at Hogwarts, I would be disappointed beyond belief. Not to mention how your mother"-she inclined her head towards my boyfriend- "would feel."

"Honestly, Professor. We would never, ever do that! I mean, we haven't done much more than passionately snog, and I don't plan on going any further at this time in my life..." It was then that I realized I was uncontrollably babbling and sharing some fairly personal information with MY PROFESSOR.

"Guilty conscience, Miss Granger?" This time I was sure the small grin was fighting to make an appearance.

"Er, no!" I stammered.

"Excellent." Any traces of amusement were gone from her face and voice. "Now, to quickly get to the pertinent topic of discussion here, Professor Snape informed me as to what occurred in Potions earlier this morning."

"I'm really sorry about that, Professor," Ron said sheepishly. "I sincerely am."

"I am shocked- utterly shocked that you two would show such disrespect to a Professor- eventhough I am aware of the fact that there isno love lost between both of you and Professor Snape. Furthermore, he's a very important member of the Order."

I hung my head shamefully. "I do apologize, Professor. It was very wrong of us, and it won't happen again."

"That I would hope. Now, I realize he did take a large amount of points from Gryffindor and gave you both a week's worth of detention with him, but I will have to add on a punishment of my own for this unacceptable behavior."

Ron and I waited with bated breaths.

"You will be spending yet another day in detention- with me."

"Well, that's not so bad, is it?' Ron let out a happy sigh.

"Yes it is, Ronald," I snapped. "Do you realize that just today I received 8 detentions and lost 60 points from Gryffindor?"

"Like Gin said, it's your inner bad girl finally showing her face." Ron winked as we slowly walked down the hall, holding hands, once Professor McGonagall dismissed us. His breath tickled my ears as he pulled me tightly against him and snuck into the empty Charms classroom. "And frankly, I can't wait to see what will happen!" he finished cheekily. I had the sudden urge to slap him, but I settled for meeting my mouth to his in a long, slow snog. "That's more like it," Ron moaned as the atmosphere suddenly turned more and more passionate.

"I think I made the right decision, Miss Granger and Mr. Weasley," a voice abruptly broke into our snogging session, "If this is any indication."

"Professor McGonagall!" I gasped.

"I unfortunately forgot to give you two this book before you left my office. I tried calling after you, but you both seemed to be involved with...other things."

Ron and I had the grace to blush simultaneously.

Without a further word, she handed me a small, blue leather book entitled, **The Consequences of Shagging at Hogwarts,** at walked briskly out of the room.

"You've got to be kidding me," I said weakly. "Someone actually wrote this book?"

"What's even more surprising is that you haven't found it yet," Ron snickered, running a finger down my spine and make me delightfully shiver.

"I don't read such dirty things."

"But you do such dirty things...to me!"

Teehee. He only wished. As his mouth covered mine once again, I had no choice but to surrender to his luscious lips and the havoc they were going to wreak havoc on my senses. For next few minutes, I allowed no thoughts of Cassandra or detention to run through my mind- it was just Ron. Only Ron. And the fact that Ron was, well to put it frankly, "a damn good kisser!" Bring it on, Cass-Ass. Does Ron kiss you like this? I didn't think so.


	4. Chapter One: The Definition of Shagging

**A/NL: Howdy, folks! First off, I would like to thank the 41 fantastic reviewers who left a comment on Chapter 3! A huge thank-you goes out to: MysteryALASKA, Airi Fairy, megan, izzie, SilentRaven987, Huggles4All, xthedramaqueenx, Morning Rose, SafetyXPins, Alli-Baby, Emma-Lynn, Mimi Chica, shadow929, silktophat, Ellie, Sweetdeath04, Lara Potter, LadySimone, dreamchubb, LadySimone123, Bella, N.C. Pyschick, MIDNIGHT-PIXIE, TheDaughterOfKings, xox.AnniePotter.xox, NicciBubbles, amrawo, Moonhawkpebbly, FairyPrincess, hiddensmile, milky way bar, I AM EOWYN, aurorasakura, hrrrypttrfan, aishteru, ShadowHexx771, Ronsreallove, suckr4romance, EponineWeasley, NinademiBrooke, cathyrock, and last, but not least, dancerrdw. I am sincerely greatful to all of you wonderful authors...**

**I would like to dedicate this chapter to my good friend LadySimone123, who is unfortunately (as I may have mentioned in an Author's Note in Battle of the Hearts) moving many, many hours away today. I love you to pieces, chica, and I will miss you A LOT! I wish you the best of luckin your new home, and please send me your address and phone number-and we must start really working on our joint-story! This chapter is for you, sista!**

**Read, review, and most importantly, ENJOY, ALL!**

* * *

"Chapter One: The Definition of Shagging." Ron cleared his throat significantly as the curious group of third through seventh year Gryffindors wriggled with anticipation in their seats. 

"Honestly," I said crossly, slamming my Potions book shut, "I didn't think it was possible for 17-year old blokes to be THAT immature!"

"Believe me, Hermione," Ginny said grumpily, "They can be." She glared at her handsome boyfriend who was leaning forward just as eagerly as the others to catch Ron's next words.

"We have to stop this!" I threw down my eagle quill. "I will not have my boyfriend corrupting the minds of innocent 13-year olds!"

"Hate to break it to you, but there's no stopping my dear brother when it's anything concerning something dirty..." Her next words were cut off by raucous laughter from the other end of the Common Room. Obviously, the object of my affections had progressed past the chapter title.

"That's it," I snapped, jumping to my feet as the childish behavior escalated. "I'm putting an end to this."

"Placing your hands on any part of your boyfriend or girlfriend's body that is normally covered by undergarments is what we classify..."

"Give me the book, _Ronald!"_ I snarled through gritted teeth.

His electric blue eyes immediately lit up. "Look! It's my..."

"Shagging partner!" Colin suggested.

"-Girlfriend," Ron finished weakly as he watched my hair very quickly begin to frizz, which was always, always, ALWAYS a BAD sign. "Girlfriend," he repeated firmly. "Just my girlfriend."

"Just your girlfriend?" I asked incredulously. "You're obviously forgetting the fact that I also happen to be one of your bloody best mates!"

There was a mass exodus towards the dormitory as my hair sparked and crackled with electricity. Everyone, excluding first and second years, could immediately sense another infamous Ron/Hermione quarrel brewing and knew much better than to stick around. After the first twenty arguments, our fighting failed to be a source of amusing entertainment. Every older Gryffindor snuck out at the first hint of my anger- that is, with the exception of the Ice Princess.

Cassandra's frosty blue eyes took in the scene with obvious satisfaction, her pouty red lips turned up in a smug little smirk, as she sat provocatively in the closest armchair to my boyfriend and I, clad in a form-fitting pair of designer slacks and a flowing peasant top. Just the sight of the Barbie made my stomach turn, and as a result, the pumpkin pastry stolen by Ginny threatened toexitfrom my stomach via mouth.

"That too," Ron said hastily, trying to redeem himself. "You're one of the most bloody brilliant people in the world, Hermione!"

"One of the most bloody brilliant people in the world?" I could not help but smiling and softening my earlier anger.

"The most bloody brilliant person in my world, at least." T he adorable redhead smiled sheepishly. " And the only one who I can do this to..."

"Ahem." A high-pitched noise of slight irritation emanating from none other than Cass-Ass.

"Yes, Cassandra?" I simpered. "Do share with us your input to this private discussion."

"Well, Ron, I was wondering if you'd care to join me for a walk around the grounds," she said brightly. "It's a beautiful day outside, and I thought we should take advantage of it."

"Ron and **I** are talking," I smirked. "And then we are going to dinner. And detention."

"Oh, it would just be a short walk, Hermione." Cassandra batted her long, curled eyelashes at the object of my affections. "What do you say, Ron? I'd really like to discuss the openings on Gryffindor's Quidditch team with you." At the word Quidditch, Ron's eyes lit up. Damn. The one thing he could talk about for HOURS- and the one topic we rarely ever discussed, seeing as to me, Quidditch is a pointless, idiotic game that only results in injuries and increasing inter-house rivalries.

"Do you mind terribly?" Ron's cobalt blue eyes pleaded with me to let him go.

"No, no," I did my best to sound nonchalant. "You go ahead. I have to finish the essay on the Blood Replenishing potion now, anyway. I'll save you a seat at dinner, Ron!" As they walked out the portrait door, Cassandra WAY TOO CLOSE to Ron for comfort, I let out a silent scream. Well, not so silent.

"Was the quarrel that bad?" Ginny called as she ran lightly down the steps from her dormitory.

"No," I sighed. "There wasn't an argument at all."

"All clear!" the petite witch yelled, as the rest of the Gryffindor house exited the havens of their dormitories and cautiously reentered the Common Room.

"Then what's bothering you, Hermione?" Ginny asked softly.

"Who else?" I grumbled. "Her."

Ginny's brown eyes darkened as she realized in a split second exactly whom I was speaking of. "What did she do to Ron?' She practically growled.

"They went on a "walk" together," I answered sourly. "The bimbo wanted to "discuss" the openings on the Quidditch team with him."

"That wench!" Ginny snarled. "Thinking she can waltz in here and seduce your boyfriend- my dear brother! After all the trouble it took to make you two bloody stubborn prats to admit your feelings in the first place...5 whole years!"

"Tell me about it," I said morosely.

"Hermione," Ginny began earnestly, "Even amidst the raging war, this past year Ron's been the happiest I've ever seen him. And it's because of you. Everyone can see the strong love you two share. Are you really going to let a little slag from Beauxbatons ruin it?"

"What am I supposed to do, Ginny?" I snapped. "Run Ron's social life? Demand that he does not fraternize with Cassandra? That'll make him go straight into her arms!"

"Tell him the truth," she said simply. "That Cassandra's a bloody pain in the ass!"

"Ginny, you are no help whatsoever." I pulled on a particularly bouncy curl in frustration. "Your brother, along with 99 percent to the male population of Hogwarts, worships the ground that bimbo walks on! It'll be a sin worthy of execution at sundown if I point out any of her major personality flaws..."

"Like being a major pain in the..."

"I comprehend the point. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must be on my way to dinner." And without a further word, I stomped most un-ladylikely out of the Gryffindor Common Room.

"What's eating HER?" I heard a scrawny second year ask Seamus.

"She couldn't get a good shag out of Ron today."

"And I DO NOT SHAG RON!"

"No, he shags you!"

* * *

"Nice of you to finally show up, when we have to be in detention in exactly TEN MINUTES!" I said sarcastically as a red-cheeked, slightly breathless Ron took a seat beside me at exactly 5:50 PM. 

"Sorry." He flashed me a lopsided grin. "Cass and I lost track of time."

_CASS?_ Since when were the French transfer student who had been at Hogwarts for all of one full day and my boyfriend start using NICKNAMES?

"Well, it's your bloody bad luck that all the roast beef is gone," I smirked. "That's simply what happens when you "lose track of time." Though I was trying to sound casual, inwardly I was experiencing multiple panic attacks. What did Ron and the Ice Princess do for one hour, five minutes, and thirty-three seconds?

"Guess what, Hermione?" Cassandra chirped.

"WHAT?" I questioned dully.

"I'm trying out for Chaser! There are two spots open, and Ron thinks I stand a bloody good chance at getting one of them..."

"Charming. But has it occurred to you that Ron has never seen you play, and HARRY, as the team captain, will be the one making the decision- not RON?"

"She's got brilliant potential, 'Mione," the hunky wizard said sincerely. "And why the sudden concern about our Quidditch team?"

"It's nothing," I mumbled, craning my neck to see if that really was Draco attempting to signal to me from across the Great Hall that we needed to talk. His left middle finger was currently up his nostrils; luckily, the other occupants of his table (Crabbe and Goyle) did not bat an eyelash. I rolled my eyes. SO juvenile. While debating if he actually had a booger stuck up his nose, or he truly did need to share something of the utmost importance with me as soon as possible, his next action proved my suspicions correct. He was licking his lips most seductively. Ah, yes. It was time for another Draco/Hermione meeting.

"See you in detention, _Ron,"_ I purposely emphasized his name. "Where we'll be ALL ALONE in Snape's cold dungeons, slicing frog hearts...TOGETHER..." I trailed off as I noticed now Draco was now making sexual, lewd gestures. "Wacked out, that one is," I muttered as I broke into an easy jog outside of the Great Hall. "But dead sexy."

"Couldn't be talking about me, Granger, could you?"

"No, Malfoy," I said solemnly, "I am describing Harry."

"What does Saint Potter have that I don't?" The sexy Slytherin pouted.

"For one thing, he does not sit at the dinner table, with a finger up his nostrils."

"That was a signal!"

"Also, for the past five years he has not made it his life purpose to be bug the hell out of Ron and I..."

"I've changed."

"He does not get manicures, nor does he wear designer robes, slacks, jumpers, shoes, knickers..."

"How do you know I wear designer knickers?"

"Harry doesn't use ten galleons worth of hair gel after every shower..."

"For once in your life, you're wrong Granger-It's only nine galleons."

"He calls me by my first name."

"Sorry, Hermione. Force of habit. I'm not used to this whole "being mates with Hermione Granger" concept."

"Get used to it, _Draco._ And finally, he does not make me be late to both Potions and detention in one day!"

"You have approximately six minutes before your evening with Professor Snape."

"Gag me. You make it sound like we're going to shag or something..."

"Nah, because Weasley would be there too- perhaps you could have a "threesome!"

"Perhaps you can explain to me why it was so important that you had to talk to me that you resorted to licking your lips in a seductive manner, making lewd and sexual gestures towards me, and sticking A FINGER UP YOUR NOSTRILS!"

"Fine."

"Fine."

"I am going to seduce her tonight."

I coughed. "My, you work fast. You've formulated a seduction plan already?"

"Nope."

"Then I fail to see how it will work."

"I didn't have to create a plan- I naturally have a seductive nature. Care me to try it out on you?"

"No thank you. Ron will be passing by any moment."

"Good point. We shall speak in the morning as to how the "encounter" went. Have an enlightening detention." I sighed. Only Mafloy.

"Enlightening?"

"You just may learn a thing or two about Snape that you didn't know before."

"Eww, ewww, EWWWWW!" I shrieked.

"Quiet! Or did you forget my threat of snogging the hell out of your mouth in an effort to keep it closed for once?

"No, sir."

"Good. Go to detention with your precious Weasley and leave everything up to me."

I swallowed hard, wondering why for some reason that didn't seem like an intelligent idea...


	5. Detention

**Howdy folks! 50 REVIEWS! You guys rock! I would like to thank the following people who left excellent, encouraging comments on Chapter 4: slytherin chick, the-insufferable-know-it-all, Kitty Weasley, Alli-Baby, Airi Fairy, Ayantara, xPussyWillowKittenx, kitotterkat, N.C. PysChick, Aladailey, SilentRaven987, Ihateharryandhermioneshippers, uknownspecies, Tria Marie Val, cathyrock, NicciBubbles, waterfaerie15, milky way bar, TheDaughterOfKings, MysteryALASKA, sheltielover, hrrypttrfan, Syd, GreenEyes, Kitt Weasley KW, FairyPrincess, amrawo, Emma-Lynn, Bloody Corsets, xox.Annie Potter.xox, QueenBee14, Endless Potential, silktophat, ShadowHexx771, Ronsreallove, MIDNIGHT-PIXIE, I AM EOWYN, xthedramaqueenx, dancerrdw, suckrromance, Orient Fox, aurorasakura16, aishteru, EponineWeasley, NinitademiBrooke, Huggles4All, and last, but not least, Sweetdeath04. Thanks a million, you guys!**

**Note: If you would like a good Ron/Hermione romance with a fresh, original writing style, read JJMel's "Perfection!" **

* * *

"Late. For yet a second time today, Miss Granger." 

Damn Draco.

"I apologize profusely, Professor."

His thin lips curled up into a smirk. "Indeed. However, I believe I will have to add yet another hour to your detention sentence this evening because of your apparent disregard for promptness."

"That's ludicrous, _sir!_ We're already staying until 11!" Ron protested.

Professor lowered his face until it was mere inches away from my boyfriend. "Did I ask for your opinion, Mr. Weasley? I think not. Now, I want these ten buckets of frog hearts cut into exactly 3-centimeter strips and placed on my desk in four hours. Have I made myself clear?"

"Yes, _sir!"_ I said brightly.

"And Mr. Weasley? Please refrain from expressing physical affection with Miss Granger this evening. I would hate to add yet another detention onto your sentence."

Ron stared at him dumbly.

"He means no snogging, Ron," I whispered, bewildered as to how Ron could be SO DAFT.

"I will return in four hours." Snape gave us a rather nasty glance and made moves towards the dungeon door.

"Excuse me, sir?' Ron called sweetly. "I was just wondering where you were going."

"As if it's any of your business, Mr. Weasley, I must meet with the headmaster and then talk to the Slytherin Prefects."

"That's not such a good idea, Snape," Ron snickered under his breath as he watched the Potions Professor walk down the dungeon hallway. "What if I decide to.."

"You'll do nothing of the sort, Ron," I said firmly, knowing fully well what words were about to come out of his mouth. Something lewd and suggestive, obviously. Although I certainly wouldn't object as long as his intended actions were PG rated- or perhaps PG-13. Naughty, naughty thoughts, Hermione!

"Well, I reckon we ought to get to work," I sighed, placing my hands on my hips as I contemplated the ten buckets of slimy frog organs before us.

"You look cute when you do that." Ron flashed me that adorable lop-sided grin that instantly turned my legs to jelly. However, I firmly stood my ground. There was going to be NO snogging until I found out just what he and the Ice Princess had been doing on their "walk."

"So, what do you think of Cassandra?" I asked casually, tentatively picking up a frog heart and holding it AS FAR AWAY FROM ME AS POSSIBLE.

Ron's whole face lit up. "She's wonderful, Hermione!" He said animatedly. "Honestly, she is! I don't see what you find wrong with her."

I was sorely tempted to share with him my 100-item list, but now was certainly not the time.

"There's nothing WRONG with her," I chose my words carefully. "It's just that our personalities seem to clash a bit."

Ron clearly was not listening to a word I was saying. "She's intelligent, witty, excellent at Quidditch, and, bloody hell, she's hot!"

"Do you forget that you're in the presence of your GIRLFRIEND?" I snapped.

Ron blushed. "Sorry, Hermione. You know I love you. But I am a living, breathing 17-year old bloke. You can't blame me for looking."

"You're not satisfied with what you have?'

Now the tip s of his ears were visibly coloring. "No, no, no!" he squeaked hastily. "You're wonderful, Hermione. It's just that, well, it's something blokes can't help but doing!"

"I surely think you can help it."

"Tell me you've never checked out any other bloke?"

My face burned as I thought of Draco's dashingly sexy good looks.

"That answers my question. And I having seen you doing so. One bloke in particular..." I knew he had me. It was best to admit it, apologize for my mistake, and give him a juicy snog.

"Yes- Draco Malfoy," I sighed.

"Harry," Ron finished, and blanched as the full force of my words hit him. "DRACO MALFOY? ARE YOU CRAZY, HERMIONE? HE'S A BLOODY GIT! THE LOWEST PIECE OF SCUM THAT WALKS THIS EARTH! A BAST..."

"He's also undeniably good-looking," I said softly. And then before I remembered I was talking to a person of the opposite sex, I added, "Don't you think so?"

Ron snorted. "Are you questioning my sexuality? And stop dodging the topic- that YOU THINK MALFOY IS SEXY!"

"He is."

"I would have to agree with Granger. I most certainly am."

_"There is no way in Merlin that is the voice of Draco Malfoy," _I pleaded loudly in my mind. _"It is just my overactive imagination. He is not standing in the doorway, watching me with mild amusement and looking VERY yummy. No bloody way!"_

"Sod off, Malfoy," Ron growled. "I don't remember inviting you to join this discussion."

"But, if it involves me, why not?" Draco smirked. "I do think I ought to have the right to defend myself."

Ron made an odd sort of sound- a snarl intermixed with some choice language. "I do think you ought to get the bloody hell out of here," he sneered, face turning red with fury, "Before I am forced to stick a pointy object up your ferrety ass."

"I can sense that I am not wanted here." Draco winked at me, most fortunately unbeknownst to Ron. "I will be on my way now. I only stopped by on my way to my dormitory to see what in Salazar was the matter- the racket you two were making could be heard halfway across the castle!" He strutted arrogantly out of sight, calling back, "Granger? Remember. Tonight is the night."

Ron pulled me roughly by the shoulder. "What is HE TALKING ABOUT?" the sexy redhead demanded furiously.

"How am I supposed to know?" I struggled to get free from his muscular arms. "I don't associate with Malfoy." I was so, so, SO sorely tempted to inform Ron with a straight face that I was to meet Draco in the Astronomy Tower at midnight for a shag, but considering the circumstances, I didn't think that would be a wise idea.

The youngest Weasley brother visibly relaxed. "I thought- I thought for a second that you- you and Draco- were- were..."

"Don't be silly- we're not!" I rolled my eyes. "_At least not yet,"_ I added silently. "I loathe Malfoy- and you know that!"

"I guess I overreacted." Ron lowered his head sheepishly. "But I did have a valid reason. Just right after you finish saying that's he's sexy..."

"Calm down, Ron." I massaged his neck, hoping to relieve some of his anxiety. "So, you think I check out Harry?" I asked cheerfully, trying to lighten the mood.

"Yes."

"And that does not worry you?"

"Nope."

"Why?"

"Because Harry is currently in love with MY baby sister, and you are currently in love with ME. Is that a good enough answer?" I could detect a hint of doubt in his low voice, though. Ron was SO insecure.

"However, Harry is not hard on the eyes at all, I'm afraid. That irresistibly messy black hair of his...those deep emerald eyes...that lean, muscular, and very sexy body of his..." I ended my spiel many minutes prematurely, seeing the state of distress that Ron was now in.

"But I'm better looking than both Harry, and (he practically spat out the word) Malfoy combined... right?" He asked with a bit of desperation.

"Of course," I lied through my teeth. Just Harry himself beat Ron by over 10 points on the sexiness scale Ginny and I had devised. And Draco? A good 15. Still, there was no real reason to share that with the object of my affections...even if he WAS eyeing up a certain twit. "You have nothing to worry about." "_Unless,"_ I added silently, "_You continue fraternizing with a certain ass-of-a-Cass."_

Fifteen minutes later, I was reassured beyond all doubt that I too had little to worry about.

"Um, Ron," I mumbled against his delicious lips, "You do realize that we would get in BIG trouble if Professor Snape were to walk in on this."

"This?' He raised a red eyebrow innocently. "We're doing nothing inappropriate. Just a little snogging."

"A lot of snogging," I corrected him, just realizing then that during our quarter of an hour of passion he had slowly backed me into the cold, slimy dungeon wall and was now 1.5 centimeters away from my body.

"Is there anything wrong with that?"

"Not exactly..."

"Brilliant. I agree. It's not like we're shagging or anything. That is, unless you want to. We could, right here, right now..."

I laughed nervously as I quickly pulled away from him.

His face took on a wounded expression. "Merlin, Hermione, I was just JOKING! No need to move away from your incredibly sexy boyfriend..."

"It's not that." I inhaled deeply, trying to control my ragged breathing. "I just think we really ought to get to work."

Ron looked at me as though I had lost my mind- or told him that Snape was sexy, which was, in essence, the same thing. "_Work?"_

"Yes. Is that an unfamiliar word to you?"

I heard him audibly give a snort of disgust and gingerly picked up the bucket closest to him. I sighed.

While snogging Ron always felt good- hell, it was bloody brilliant! - it seemed that each session grew longer, more passionate, and more tempting. And that honestly scared me. Although his hands had never moved below my neck (we tried to keep it G-rated-just some light or not-so light snogging), I was a smidgen frightened that one day he'd get carried away. We both would. There was no question about it. The feelings and desires he invoked in me...And while I had joked lightly about shagging, it was definitely an act that I reserved strictly for marriage. Along with all other deep intimacies. And I didn't plan on ever going back on my vow of absistence. Until my wedding night, that is. I didn't want our physical relationship to begin escalating from innocent snogs to "things" not so innocent. (**A/N: Yes, had to put the whole absistence thing in...it's something I firmly believe in, and much too many fanfictions have Hermione and Ron, who in my mind are honorable, upstanding, moral characters, jump in bed together and shag like there's no tomorrow- honestly, do you really think they would do that? Furthermore, is that right? I don't wish to offend anyone with this...I reckon everyone's entitled to their own opinion of what they put into their stories...).**

"I'm sorry Ron," I said softly. "I was just worried for a second."

"Worried?"

"That one day we'll have problems stopping."

"Stopping?"

"Yes, s-t-o-p-p-i-n-g! The opposite of s-t-a-r-t-i-n-g."

He threw a particularly disgusting heart at me, but fortunately missed by three feet. The organ landed with a small splat on the stone floor. "I knew that," he pouted.

"No need to begin launching objects at me," I sniggered. "Once in a while I feel that I have to spell things out for you."

"Are you insinuating I am an idiot?"

"_Compared to Draco, yes!" _That nasty little voice in my head snickered. WHOA! Where in Merlin did THAT come from? "_I must banish all thoughts of a certain delicious Slytherin from my head,"_ I chided myself firmly. "_Especially in the presence of Ron."_

"No, no, no," I said hurriedly. "Far from it." My mind wandered to just what Draco could be doing- or attempting to do- to Cassandra at that very moment. I felt a small flicker of jealousy. "_Eeek! Do I really want Draco to be doing those things to me?"_ Heehee. The answer wasS O obvious.Although I had only known the "good" Draco for a time span of 12 hours, there was something undeniably attractive about him. Alas, he had ALWAYS been very good looking- no doubt about that. He was the one bloke that pratically every single witch at Hogwarts could agree on- from Hufflepuffs to Slytherins.But now that he had seen the light..and had undergone an excellent personality change (at least when in my presence), he was quickly becoming more and more tempting. ."_You have Ron,"_the voice of logic reminded me obnoxiously. "_But for how long?"_I asked myself. Any sense of hope that I had felt while his lips were crashing against mine immediately disappeared as I remembered just who I was up against. Someone just as clever as me. Someone who was drop-dead gorgeous and had an excellent figure and non-poofy hair. Someone who was only sinking her claws deeper into the object of my affections as each hour passed. Someone named Cassandra.

* * *

**A/N: Coming up next Saturday...Draco's "seduction!"**


	6. 5:30 RR

**Howdy folks! TEEHEE! 55 reviews on this chapter! That makes me EXTREMELLY HAPPY! Alas, I am a smidgen hyper right now. I apologize beforehand for any mistakes or confusing things in this chapter...I was on vacation at the beach for the past week, so I typed up this chapter this morning. Anyway, I would like to thank the following fantastic guys and gals who reviewed Chapter 5 (especially those (most of you!) who made positive comments- or some sort of comments- on absistence!). A huge thank-you goes out to: LadySimone123 (you must email me, chica, and tell me how everything's going!), antonia, GreenEyes, FairyPrincess, silktophat, NicciBubbles, Iloveyou064, eckles, N.C. PsyChick, Kitty Weasley, TheDaughterOfKings, cathyrock, YamiNekoKai, Lara Potter, SafetyXPins, kitotterkat, Anna, Loku, the-insufferable-know-it-all, Eponine Weasley, SilentRaven987, aurorasakura16, Ayantara, Emma-Lynn, mim, lacatamar, skysongscry, xPussyWillowKittenx, Aqb Dk, Elemental Water Mistress (I'm a Christian too! You rock, sista!), Syd, true-slytherin05, unknownspecies, goblin monkey, sheltielover, violet snicket, Alli-Baby, I AM EOWYN, MysteryALASKA, ShadowHexx771, MIDNIGHT-PIXIE, Orient Fox, Grim Reaper's Assistant, HiddenSmile, Ellie, NinitademiBrooke, Huggles4All, suckr4romance, love3luvfromCes, aishteru, and last, but not least, dancerrdw. **

**Another apology before you read this chapter: Unfortunately, this chapter does not include the whole "seduction" of Cassandra...but this leads up to Draco's recollection of it...I'm truly sorry about this...I kinda got carried away with everything that happened before Draco actually shares with Hermione if the plan was a success or not...So expect the whole "seduction" next week! I promise! I hope this chapter doesn't disappoint anyone...Ithink it's fairly amusing...As usual, read, review, and above all else, ENJOY!**

* * *

I stumbled blindly into the dormitory five hours later. "Lumos," muttered, using the light from my wand to avoid tripping over all of Parvati, Lavender, and now Cassandra's junk that covered the plush red carpet in a jumble of robes, hair potions, and beauty products.

"Oooh, Hermione!" A shrill voice pierced the darkness. I closed my eyes in frustration and massaged my temples. The tone of Lavender's voice indicated that I was in for some serious teasing- something I was not at all enthused about at half past midnight.

"No time to talk now, Lav," I grumbled. "I just came up to get my Charms book.

"You're not going anywhere, Hermione," she said gleefully. I began to slowly become a smidgen irritated.

"Look. I'm tired, hungry, and grumpy, and I have just spent the past 5 hours in detention with Snape- and I have a 2 ½ foot long essay for Flitwick! I don't need this..."

"But you have a secret admirer!" Lavender cackled.

"I DO NOT! For your information..."

"Oh, this is ridiculous," Parvati snapped from my right. I heard the swish of her wand as two oil lamps suddenly flickered to light. "Now, look at your bed." Perched atop my red velour blanket was a noble-looking grey owl, hooting most dignifiedly and sitting rather primly on top of a piece of expensive, heavy parchment. Lavender cleared her throat impatiently.

"Well, are you going to read it? That ruddy owl's only been there for ten minutes!"

"I really appreciate you two waiting up for me," I broke in.

"Don't flatter yourself. We were painting our nails." Typical Lavender answer.

"In the dark?"

"The polish is supposedly bewitched to glow and change colors in the dark."

"Fascinating. Not that I care or anything, but aren't we disrupting the bimbo's beauty rest with this light and noise?"

"She hasn't come to bed yet."

"Probably off with some sexy bloke or another in a broom closet." Parvati added darkly.

"_Hopefully Draco."_ I crossed my fingers behind my back.

"Now read, Hermione! We haven't got all night!" Parvati crossed her arms across her pink terry cloth bathrobe.

"You two are certainly the most inquisitive witches I've ever met in my life," I grinned.

"Why, thank you," the two Gryffindors replied in unison.

"Patience is a virtue," I reminded them,

"Not at 12:37 AM."

"Fine, fine." I opened the crisp white stationary carefully. In an elegant cursive script were a mere two words: 5:30 RR.

"Who's it from?" Lavender chirped.

"Uh- just Ron," I stuttered.

Parvati narrowed her amber eyes. "I know as well as you do that Ron can't afford that quality of parchment."

"It's a present from Fred and George. Business is really booming at the shop." I smiled weakly.

"A likely story." Lav frowned with open suspicion. "This owl has now been here for 15 minutes. You've been with Ron until 5 minutes ago. When did he have a chance...?"

"Stranger things have happened." I gave a large yawn, summoned my Charms book, my favorite quill, parchment, and pyjamas, and dove into the refuge of my four-poster bed, pulling the scarlet hangings shut.

"And that's definitely not Ron's handwriting," the beautiful black-haired witch called after me. "In fact, if I didn't know any better I'd say..."

"Sod off, Parvati," I snapped, magically sealing the curtains and placing a Silencing Charm on my bed. I fell back on my fluffy purple pillow in the shape of a cat (a 16th birthday present from Mum and Dad) and unfolded the cryptic note once again. I assumed that Draco was unfortunately referring to 5:30 AM in the morning. The "RR," on the other hand, would take some thought and time...I glanced ruefully at my unfinished Charms essay. Neither of which I had a good deal of at the moment. "RR," I pondered as I dipped my quill into the inkpot, swearing under my breath rather loudly as I accidentally splattered a drop of ink on my pristine white sheet.

"Evanesco," I yawned the first spell that came to mind, unfortunately resulting in the disappearance of the whole sheet. "Dammit, I know I'm not a night person, but HONESTLY!" I growled, waving my wand to repair the damage and muttering the correct spell, "Scourgify."

"_The Fidelus Charm is a very complex charm,"_ I scrawled, then shook my head sleepily, and scratched my words out half-heartedly. My opening sentence sounded LOUSY and was, in essence, unacceptable by my standards.

"_The Fidelus Charm, a complicated charm, is more commonly referred to as..."_ Ah, yes. That was better- but still miles away from perfection. I yawned widely, and fortunately remembered to cast a nifty little spell I'd read about in "_101 Useful Spells for the Scholar,"_ which would awaken one at the time he or she desired, which, in my case, was 4:45 AM, before falling into a deep, well-earned rest.

* * *

_"You're looking darn sexy tonight, Hermione," Draco said huskily, running a slender finger down my bare arm. I shivered. "I believe I just may have to snog you bloody senseless."_

_"That really won't be necessary." I said weakly, attempting to inch out of the room. Draco pulled me flush against his muscular, lean body. _

_"You're not going anywhere, Hermione, until I'm finished with you..." I blinked. I could've sworn I recollected someone saying that exact same phrase to me before. A bloke who was adorable, handsome, and MY BOYFRIEND! _

_"Ron!" I yelped. _

_"Oh, don't worry about the Weasel," Draco said silkily, before lowering his mouth to mine._

* * *

"Bloody water! Thinking you can just waltz onto my face at 4:45 in the BLOODY MORNING!" I shrieked at the top of my lungs as indeed the "alarm-clock" spell I had cast less than four hours ago obviously worked- in the form a jet of icy cold water blasting me RIGHT IN THE FACE! Wiping water out of my bleary eyes, I blanched, remembering five quite disturbing things, each more terrible than the last. 

1.) It was 4:45 in the BLOOD MORNING

2.) I had gotten approximately 3 hours and 45 minutes of sleep

3.) In forty-five minutes, I had to meet DRACO MALFOY in an unknown location

4.) My Charms essay consisted of 12 words.

And, finally...

5.) I had quite the erotic dream concerning Draco dong naughty things to me...and I HAD RELISHED EVERY MINUTE OF IT!

Alas, I was not in a very chipper or happy mood as I urged my weary bones out of bed.

"Dear Godric!" I gasped as I felt the unpleasantly cold floor beneath my feet. However, it did properly awake me, and soon I was rattling through a list of the names of places in Hogwarts that contained two r's. It hit me exactly as I was buttoning up my modest white blouse. "That's it! The Room of Requirement!" Although it befuddled me for a few minutes as to how Draco knew about that secret, I remembered that he WAS a Malfoy- and Malfoys always had ways of prying information from people- especially the witches. I pulled on my robes excitedly, hurriedly pulling –er- trying to pull a brush through my tangled mat, but, as usual, with little success. I gave my appearance a final check.

Hair? Tangled and a smidgen on the frizzy side, which indicated a high dew point- perhaps there was going to be rain later in the day. "You'll take no walks with Ron today, Cassandra," I cackled, looking over at her sleeping form.

Clothing? Robes looked the same as usual- long, drab, boring, and completely unflattering to the figure- not that I had any to speak of.

Grabbing my bag crammed with schoolbooks, and practically wrenching my shoulder from the heavy weight, I high-tailed it out of the dormitory, realizing halfway down the girls' staircase that I had forgotten to slip on my bloody loafers...

* * *

"I need a place where I can talk to Hermione about my seduction of that bimo." I heard Draoc's rather loud drawl before I saw him. "And where we can share a delicious breakfast." I stopped dead in my tracks. 

"We're _sharing a breakfast?"_ I asked the sexy Slytherin incredulously. I swear in Merlin that was the absolute first time I had ever seen Draco blush- or become flustered at all, for that matter. It was a most amusing sight. The red tinge rising on his cheeks contrasted sharply with his pale skin, creating quite the picture. "You're blushing!" I helpfully pointed out the obvious.

"I AM NOT! A Malfoy never blushes."

"Well, perhaps you aren't a true Malfoy." I opened the door that just appeared. "After you," I added generously. Then, when I heard no response from him, "That first comment was a compliment, by the way."

"I see."

"You really outdid yourself, Draco," I smiled wryly as I regarded the lavish room with carefully concealed awe. "I like the candles."

Draco flushed. "I didn't ask for candles," he said nervously.

"You wouldn't by any chance be trying to BUTTER ME UP before sharing BAD NEWS with me, would you?" I questioned.

"Here. Stop talking and sit. Or have you, for the hundredth time, forgotten my threat?" He pulled the chair out for me.

"I must be dreaming. You are actually being a COURTEOUS GENTLEMAN for once."

"Don't push your luck. Now, sod off and let me begin my story." He slapped my hand that was creeping towards a particularly delicious looking blueberry Danish on the polished table. "And no breakfast until I'm done talking."

"Listen up, you pratty git. I got up at 4:45 AM for YOU, after 3 hours and 45 minutes of sleep!"

"It's not my fault you and Weasley spent so much time shagging after detention last night," Draco shrugged.

"We didn't shag," I said through gritted teeth. "And nor have we ever shagged before, and we will NOT in the future until our wedding night. That is," I added as an afterthought, "If we both survive this war and decide to become married."

"Don't get your knickers in a twist! There's no need to start fiercely defending your virginity. This crack-of-dawn meeting isn't about your love life- it's concerning a certain favor I am carrying out for you. Anyway, you're the one who announced rather loudly in the Great Hall that you and Ron were going to shag!"

"I'm thoroughly ashamed at that memory, all right? I should've never said that."

"Sure," the Slytherin Seeker smirked.

"What about you?' I asked, suddenly curious.

"Although I may not seem as virtuous and morally upstanding as you, Potty, and Weasel, I didn't sleep with Cassandra last night and never have with any other witch- any night or day. Now, can I please continue?"

"As you wish," I said indifferently.

"It was a dark and stormy night..." As if on cue, the lights went out, and I heard a low rumble of thunder.

I raised my eyebrows. "Nice touch," I snorted through the dark. "That is, if I hadn't seen you flick your wand beforehand."

"I learn only from the best," the handsome blonde answered almost sadly. I sighed, thinking of the Death Eaters, his father, and Voldemort himself.

"Yes, you DID."

"Do." He corrected me. "Although I've come to the side of good, I've chosen to still remain a Death Eater." He sighed. "It's the only way I'm helpful to the Order. Like Snape, I'm a spy."

"If you're ever bored, Draco," I said with all seriousness and a tad bit randomly, "Do me a favor and become an actor. You're excellent."

"Why, thank you. I know I am."

"That performance on the Hogwarts Express when you passionately defended Voldemort...WOW! It was quite impressive."

"Indeed. Now, unless you close your mouth in the next 5 seconds, I really will have to..."

* * *

**Coming next week: THE SEDUCTION!**


	7. The Seduction of Cassandra

**WHEE! 46 reviews! Down a little bit from usual, but who am I to complain? I have wonderful reviewers who leave great comments and give me lots of encouragement and inspiration..so THANK YOU to: Eternally Optimistic, Ayantara, PinkLadyRock, keepsmilin', laura truewood, Lara Potter, NicciBubbles, TheDaughterOfKings, LadySimone, LadySimone123, Kitty Weasley, MysteryALASKA, Bloody Corsets, quidditchgirl13, RainDateChick, goblinmonkey, the-insufferable-know-it-all, waterfaerie15, Loku, Tria Marie Val, dreamchubb, xPussyWillowKittenx, Emma-Lynn, GreenEyes, aishteru, N.C. PysChick, MrsPadfootVerona, eckles, AmyChris, True Slytherin Witch, sheltielover, Aqb DK, Fairy Princess, aurorasakura16, hrrypttrfan, SilentRaven987, slytherin chick, Sweetdeath04, Grim Reaper's Assistant, Huggles4All, dancerrdw, I AM EOWYN, NinitademiBrooke, Orient Fox, Eponine Weasley, and last, but certainly NOT least, the fabulous suckr4romance! **

**Now, I have a sort of problem. I'm traveling to Canada with my Girl Scout troop on Monday, and I won't be back until late Friday night. All day Saturday, I may possibly be at a major league baseball game with the summer jazz band I belong to, because we have a gig there. Thus, depending on how much I get done on Chapter 8 today and tomorrow, I am not sure when I'll be able to get Chapter 8 up. It'll probably not be Saturday, but if we get home too late on Friday from Canada and I don't go to the game, there is a slight chance you will see the usual update. Otherwise, I'll post ASAP after Saturday...perhaps Sunday or even Monday. Again, I apologize for this. Just keep on a lookout in your email if you have me on your Author Alert list!**

**If anyone would like to read a slightly angsty, VERY well-written fiction that is a romance of sorts, try ladyro7's "Icicles in My Heart." It's a GREAT story, but unfortunately has little in the way of reviews...**

**Now, without further ado, I present you...Chapter 7, The Seduction of Cassandra !**

* * *

"Indeed. Now, unless you close your mouth in the next 5 seconds, I really will have to..."

"Have to what?" I asked slyly.

"Do this," he sighed, conjuring a cloth gag and, with a wave of his wand, tying it tightly across my mouth.

"Mmmfff!" I made a loud sound of protest.

"Sorry, couldn't catch what you were saying," Draco sniggered. "Please speak up."

Luckily, I had been fingering my wand the whole time, and quickly removed the gag by whispering a simple spell.

"I said that I don't feel comfortable sitting in a dark room with you, unable to utter a single word or shout for help." I restored the light to the room and looked at Draco with an expression of slight interest. "Do continue."

"It was a dark and stormy night," he repeated, this time without any special sound effects, "when...

"_The handsome, muscular young man strutted down the corridor, running a hand through silky blonde locks that witches always moaned with desire to feel beneath their fingers..."_

_"_Please refrain from sharing with me a wonderful example of your over-inflated ego."

"The last time I checked, Draco Malfoy, not Hermione Granger, was telling this story. And I could share much worse things with you..."

_"His piercing silver eyes glanced over to a shadowy corner- the rendezvous spot for the young Pureblood and his challenge for that night."_

"You sound like a ginormous pimp."

"A good-looking ginormous pimp, nevertheless."

_"Unfortunately, the black-haired beauty was not in the designated meeting spot. Draco furrowed his brow elegantly. There was no way it could have slipped her mind, for he had cornered her three hours previously and whispered most seductively, "Meet me near the statue of Confudus the Constipated at 11 o'clock if you want to be ravished."_

"You did NOT say that," I gasped through uncontrollable giggles. "No wonder she didn't come. Who would want to be _ravished_ by Draco Malfoy?"

"That was an uncalled-for remark."

"Sorry."

_"Actually, the dead sexy Slytherin whispered most seductively something along the lines of, "Meet me near the statue of Confudus the Constipated at 11 o'clock if you would like to have a little 'fun.'"_

"And before you say anything, remember that you can't disagree with the dead sexy description. I heard you with my own two ears..."

"I wasn't going to say anything at all." I blushed violently.

"Hmpph. Quite unusual for you. Does it hurt, keeping your mouth shut for more than 2 minutes?"

I chose not to give him the dignity of a reply.

"Very well then. I ought to continue, I reckon..."

_"After a few minutes Draco started to grow impatient. No witch (except for Gryffindors, Ravenclaws, and Hufflepuffs) ever resisted his advances."_

"Cassandra is a Gryffindor."

"Thanks for pointing out the obvious."

"_Even though his sharp mind knew that Cassandra was indeed a Gryffindor..."_

_"_What sharp mind?" I yawned. "Could you please skip ahead to the action? My stomach is growling rather ferociously."

Draco grabbed the banana nut muffin out of my hand ferociously. "Have patience. We will eat LATER, after I finish my story. And control those hands of yours, for Merlin's sake!"

"I can't."

"Excuse me?" Did I just hear the great Hermione Granger say that she can't do something?"

"Yes." I bowed my head shamefully. "It may come as a shock, but I am a normal, living, breathing, mortal female who has flaws like everyone else."

"Let's see: extreme bossiness, overperfectionism, a lack of a sense of humor, excessively bushy hair.."

"There's really no need to list them all," I said calmly, but inside I was seething. How dare he!

"Now, are you going to keep those hands on your lap, or will I have to HOLD THEM?" Draco smirked.

For yet a second time, I chose not to give him the dignity of a reply.

"_Finally, just as young Draco was about to give up all hope- and mind you, that did not occur on a frequent basis- the sexy-as-heck witch sauntered seductively into the room, her cold blue eyes, well, COLD."_

_"_That last line was most creative."

"I'm not aiming for a Nobel Prize in Literature, you know." Draco's nostrils flared in a way reminiscent of Professor McGonagall.

_"Cassandra," Draco said huskily, tucking a long strand of glossy black hair behind her ear, "I would really like to get to know you better."_

'"_Your reputation precedes you, Mr. Malfoy." The Ice Princess said coolly, putting her perfectly manicured hand on her slim hip."_

_"_You should have felt right at ease, Draco. You were in the company of a fellow manicure-receiver!"

_"What reputation?" the extremely wealthy young man furrowed his brow in confusion."_

"What reputation?' I echoed, before falling into hysterical laughter, only stopping my glee when I began to hyperventilate from lack of air.

"_You're a damn good kisser, or so I've heard from reliable sources," she continued. "But you are very particular in the witches that you choose- choose and then throw away like a dirty rag. And though I am certainly flattered that I am one of the select few, and you are fairly sexy, with a lean, muscular body, silky blonde hair that falls just the right way into your piercing silver eyes, and a knee-weakening smile...""_

"Wait, wait, wait. Back up a second. Is she talking about you?" I snorted incredulously, even though deep down inside I knew it was all true.

'"..._I'm afraid that I cannot have relations of the sexual nature with you."'_

"Blimey, she really is a prostitute! Assuming that you two would shag after knowing each other for a total of 26 hours..."

_"However, I can do this..."_

_"_Are you the one seducing her, or is it the other way around?" I asked curiously.

"_Cassandra leaned forward until she was literally falling out of her low-cut jumper, giving Draco a really, really, REALLY nice look at her quite ample chest."_

"Ugh. Men. How disgusting."

"You wouldn't like me to look down your shirt?"

That was the final straw. "I am sick and tired of your lewd, crude, and socially unacceptable comments!" I cried dramatically. "Just STOP! No, I do NOT want you to look down my shirt, nor do I want you to hold my hands, nor do I want you to snog the hell out of my mouth in an effort to keep it shut. Do you understand?"

Draco just stared incredulously at me, his mouth gaping wordlessly like a fish.

"What an IDIOT," I groaned. "Why, why, WHY in Merlin do I have to rely on DRACO MALFOY to save my love life or lack thereof?" I reached for my satchel, hopped up, and tried frantically to open the door. It was locked. "Alohomora!" I snapped, my spell unfortunately having no effect whatsoever on the condition of the door.

"The door won't open," the sexy beast (whoops! I did NOT just say that!) smiled calmly.

"I don't care if you have to stand here in nothing but your knickers and profess your undying love for Professor Snape," I hissed, blushing when the yummy image of Draco in nothing but his boxers popped into my head. "Make the bloody door open. NOW."

"The door won't open," he repeated, propping his feet up on the table. "Until I am finished. Now, I believe it would be best if you would sit down and make yourself comfortable once again, for there is still more to my story."

"I don't bloody want to HEAR IT!" I screamed.

"You're lucky I put a Silencing Charm on this room. Or else you would've woken up about half the castle by now."

"You're lucky you just Accio-ed my wand from me," I snarled, "Or else you would quickly find yourself a victim of the Bat-Bogey Hex that Ginny has so kindly taught me. On second thought, I reckon I can take you on with my bare hands."

"_I know what you're up to, Malfoy," the witch said silkily in the deadliest of whispers. And with that, she nibbled on a shocked and very pale Draco's ear and pressed a cold kiss to his lips. Without another word, she faded back into the shadows, leaving a disappointed and handsome wizard behind."_

"Last time I trust you to help me," I sighed.

"I tried. And that's what's important." Draco said softly.

"What's important is that you made no progress WHATSOEVER," I grumbled.

"There is another way..."

"Please enlighten me..."

"Now, I do not think you'll like this one..."

* * *

"You're bloody right I won't like this one," I growled, finally taking a bite out of a blueberry muffin without Draco snatching it away. 

"Trust me. It will work. I am a guy. I know these things." He inhaled a strawberry danish.

"You're saying I need to make Ron jealous by finding a sexy bloke to passionately kiss me right before his big blue eyes?"

"Yes."

"My lips are reserved for Ronald Weasley, and Ronald Weasley alone. End of discussion."

"Ah, come on, Hermione. Do you want to keep Ron or not?"

"Perhaps the situation isn't as dire as we believe," I mused, sipping my pumpkin juice.

"Perhaps you can't afford to wait and see if it is."

He had a good point. Who knew what Cassandra would try next? But still...

"Well, what bloke are you thinking of?" I asked tentatively.

"Someone who doesn't have a girlfriend. Someone whose lips you wouldn't feel repulsed to have on your own. Someone who Ron despises SO much that he would surely believe that it was a one-sided kiss and you were not at fault at all. Someone...like me."

* * *

"Bad night, Hermione?" Harry patted my arm sympathetically as I took a seat between him and Ron at breakfast. 

"You could say that," I mumbled. "Although bad day, bad week, bad month, bad year, bad life, bad EXISTENCE would be more accurate."

"Someone's in a testy mood this morning." Ginny piled an unhealthy amount of sausages on her plate and dug in. I literally gagged at the sight. I had devoured much too much breakfast in the Room of Requirement after hearing Draco's disturbing plan in an effort to forget about it, and my stomach was now desperately begging for mercy.

"Crumpet?" Harry offered me one.

"No-no thank you. I'm not feeling too well."

"Well, don't look now, but I think something has arrived that will make you feel MUCH worse." Cass-Ass, obviously.

"Good morning, Ron and Harry. Hermione, where in Merlin were you this morning? I arose at 5 AM to take my shower and you were already out of bed!" she trilled. "I was worried about you. I mean, we are roommates now. And roommates HAVE to look out for each other. Were you ill?" she simply gushed.

Ginny looked like she was on the verge of giving Harry a present of a mouthful of half-chewed sausage as she tried very hard not to explode with laugher. Harry himself was snickering under his breath. Ron, on the other hand, was watching her with a rapt expression on his handsome face, living for each word that she breathed out of her perfectly red lips.

"I was at the library," I muttered, blanching when I realized just what the Barbie was attired in: a scrap of navy plaid that I was positive did not meet an eighth of the length requirement for our uniform skirts, and a blouse magically shrunk so that it fit like a second skin. I looked ruefully at my knee-length skirt and modest yet stylish top.

I jumped about ten feet in the air when Ron poked me hard in the side.

"Cassandra asked you a question." He raised a reddish eyebrow at me. "Aren't you going to answer her?"

'_You obviously didn't hear me over your ragged breath and loud panting that began after seeing her outfit for today.'_

"I said LIBRARY," I snapped. "I was finishing my Charms essay. I fell asleep last night halfway through composing it."

"Oh, perhaps we can compare essays at the beginning of class? I heard that you are an excellent writer, 'Mione. Is it okay if I call you that? Anyway, I believe that it would _inspire_ me on future assignments if I could have but one look at your hard work."

"Where are you going?" Ron looked at me quizzically as I jumped up like someone had told me that Voldemort was currentlyhidingunder the table, looking up my skirt.

"The loo," I called back, as I sped up my steps and began my search for Draco.

* * *

**A/N: Now, please don't be worried that Hermione and Draco will passionately snog...if anything happens, it will be one-sided and completely fake in an effort to make Ron jealous, seething mad at Draco, and very over-protective of Hermione. This WILL NOT turn into a Draco/Hermione romance. If anything romantic happens between those two (holding hands, etc.) it won't even be considered "truly"romantic...it justwill be JUST FOR THE SAKE OF THE PLAN. Nothing more, nothing less. Hermione loves Ron, and although Draco is as sexy as heck, she's loyal to Ron. So do not be afraid!**


	8. Of a JumperLess Harry

**Alas, I am posting, suprisingly,on Saturday (I ended up not going to the game.) Anyway, I had a fabulous- but tiring- time in Toronto, Canada this week. It was a ginormous treat to come home and find all these fabulous reviews in my mailbox! A huge thanks to: cathyrock, AngelicOne, Marina Hydroswim (You rock! And yes, I will review yours later today!), skysongscry, Ryan, Orient Fox, LadySimone123, Alli-Baby, ihateharryandhermioneshippers, Rachel, I AM EOWYN,lacatamar, Kitty Weasley, Endless Potential, SilentRaven987,eckles, Emma-Lynn, N.C. PysChick, hermione-gurl787, kitotterkat, goblin mokey, PhoenixWings13, GreenEyes, WhiteRoseDancer, Grim Reaper's Assistant, Lumos2000, the-insufferable-know-it-all, ladyro7, xox.Annie Potter .xox, NicciBubbles, NinitademiBrooke, Lara Potter, MIDNIGHT-PIXIE, waterfaerie15, aishteru, Ayantara, Just some HP reviewer, hrrypttrfan,Huggles4All, suckr4romance, quidditchgirl13, and last, but not least, dancerrdw. Thanks a BUNCH! Just a note: I will be posting on Friday instead of Saturday next weekend, for I am going camping for a week at a state park up north. But never fear, you will have an update on: July 8th, July 15th or 16th, and every Saturday from then on. One question: Will you all continue reading this even after the sixth book comes out? I hope so... :-)**

**If you would like a wonderful, well-written story, take a peek at my friend Marina Hydroswim's fabulous fic, "The MapleLeaf Summer." There's only one chapter so far, but TRUST me, it's fantastic!**

**Read, review, and above all else, as usual, ENJOY!**

**Note: There will be more Ron in later chapters. TRUST ME. **

* * *

"Relinquish control of your Charms essay right this instant or I will hex you until tomorrow." I pointed my wand right at Draco's neck. 

"Easy, Granger," he drawled, moving my wand away with a slender hand.

_Granger? _There was a loud cough and I saw Justin Finch-Fletchley looking at the two of us with keen interest.

"Am I seeing things wrong, or is Hermione begging Draco Malfoy for his Charms assignment?"

"You're seeing things wrong, mate." Draco performed a nifty little weak Memory Charm on the Hufflepuff and the poor bloke walked away mumbling under his breath.

"That wasn't very nice." I frowned. "Not to mention semi-illegal."

My companion rolled his eyes. "It only wiped his memory for the past five minutes. Don't get your knickers in a twist."

"Well, thank you for saving my reputation," I said grudgingly.

"Any time. Now, if you're going to borrow my two and half feet of parchment, I require you to do something in return."

"Sure, sure. I don't care what it is. Just hand over the assignment!" I cried desperately. This obsession with my marks HAD to stop. I was willing to put myself at the mercy of DRACO MALFOY for one measly grade. PATHETIC.

"You will go along with the plan."

"No bloody way." I paused in the middle of very shamefully using a Cheating spell which copied his words to my parchment and put them in my own handwriting and fixed him with the dirtiest glare I could muster under the circumstances.

"Fine. Then I will just set your piece of parchment on fire. _Incend..."_

_"_Don't!" I quickly grabbed the parchment and hid it behind my back.

"Say yes."

"No," I said firmly. "I will NOT agree to your lame-brained scheme."

"Say yes."

"N-no," I stammered, my resolve weakening.

"SAY YES!"

"Yes!" I reluctantly mumbled a second before he Accio-ed the parchment from my hand.

"That's what I like to hear. We will meet at 11:00 tonight in the Room of Requirement. Got that?"

"Got it," I said shakily.

* * *

"This essay is absolutely exquisite!" Cassandra cooed. "Have you ever considered working for the Witch Weekly when you graduate? Don't you think she'd be _perfect _for that job, Ronald?" 

"I have MUCH better things to do with my time then write articles for a rubbishy news magazine," I said through gritted teeth, viciously murdering a fly that had chosen most unfortunately to land on my desk with the tip of my quill, all the while pretending that it was a certain b-with-an-itch-of-a-witch.

"But you have _true_ talent," she said in her attempt of earnestly. "It would be a shame to see it go to waste."

"Yes, that would be a shame." There was NO way in Godric she could miss the sarcastic edge to my voice.

"A bloody shame," Harry chimed in from my right. From across the Charms classroom, Draco smirked. Now not only did Cassandra think he was sexy, but also that he had TRUE talent in writing. That was, of course, assuming that she was being honest. As I looked over his words for the first time, I reluctantly concluded that for the first time in her wretched life, the Ice Princess was telling the truth. Draco was almost as good as _me. _And that was saying A LOT.

"In fact, I reckon that you are superior to even_ Draco_," she continued, as though reading my mind. My eyes widened.

"Good morning, class!" Professor Flitwick squeaked, thankfully ending a certain conversation that was gradually becoming slightly disturbing.

"Good morning, Professor Flitwick!" I said VERY brightly as the vertically challenged wizard passed by me.

"Well, you certainly are in a chipper mood this morning, Miss Granger." He smiled, blue eyes twinkling.

"It's because of her essay, sir," Cassandra piped in sweetly. "It is WONDERFULLY written. I do feel that she ought to read it aloud to the class, to encourage us to work up to her impressive level."

"And excellent idea, Miss Valet. However, why just limit it to Miss Granger? I'm sure Mr. Malfoy's is just as superb as always. Miss Granger? Mr. Malfoy? Would you both please share your essays with the class?"

I shared a quick, desperate look with Draco. What were we going to do NOW? Even though the words and paragraphs were re-arranged a bit on my parchment, they still clearly bore a very strong resemblance to Draco's composition. Something that Flitwick probably wouldn't have noticed when quickly scanning them over and scrawling hopefully an "O" on the top...but hearing the two with his own ears would be a whole different story.

"Actually, sir, that's not so excellent of an idea," I said rather loudly. "You see, I was wondering if we could discuss the dangers of the Fidelus Charm instead."

"Very well, Miss Granger," Professor Flitwick sighed with disappointment, giving me a strange glance. I could feel Cassandra cold blue eyes boring into the back of my head, and I allowed a small, victorious smirk to cross my face. Hermione: 1, Cassandra: 0. The score was in MY favor.

* * *

"Bloody Malfoy. If it wasn't for that git, I would NOT be flitting through the corridors at 10:45 at night, risking possible detention or expulsion!" I grumbled to myself from underneath the Invisibility Cloak that I had –er- borrowed. Actually, Harry had been nowhere to be seen when I had slipped into the Gryffindor Tower after detention, so I had just helped myself- chances were, he would never notice. 

"If we're caught, you could just say we're doing Prefect duties," a low voice suggested.

"True," I reluctantly agreed, enfolding Draco in the cloak also as we approached the seventh floor corridor. For the third year in a row, both the blond bloke and I had been appointed Prefects- neither of us Head Boy/Head Girl, however. That exalted honor had gone to Justin Finch-Fletchley and Hannah Abott, which had raised many eyebrows-doubly mine. After all, I had reckoned that six years of perfect grades and a nearly flawless discipline record would eventually count for something...but, as usual, Dumbledore had his reasons, as he had explained in a long, detailed letter. "Only problem is, we would NEVER patrol together by our own free will."

"Well, it doesn't really matter, does it?" He pointed to the tapestry of Barnabas the Barmy and said quite unnecessarily, "We're here."

"All right. Now remember, concentrate HARD."

"No need to." My mouth dropped open.

"Blimey, you're good," I said in awe.

"Alas, I am good. At many things." He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. "One of my greatest talents being making secret doors appear instantaneously."

"But not doors that open," I snorted, yanking on the doorknob and my efforts not being rewarded in the least.

"Allow me, Granger." Draco purposely let my last name slip just to bug me. "You, like all witches, are obviously too weak."

"No, allow ME!" I snarled through gritted teeth, trying desperately to keep my temper in check. "Alohomora!" Nothing happened.

"Obviously your attempts have been proven futile. I will demonstrate to you, once again, that males are superior to females. "_Attero!" _He cried, completely demolishing the doorknob and leaving an apple-sized hole in the spell's wake."

"Impressive," I said dryly. "Defiling Hogwarts property with spells learned from Death Eaters."

"I'm not much one for the rules, as you may know."

"Yes, after spending two days in your endearing company I have certainly concluded that."

"Bloody hell!"

"I gave you a compliment of sorts. No need to direct profanity towards me."

"Look in there," Draco whispered from beneath the cloak he had stolen from my hands. And indeed, I saw a very good reason indeed as to what he found worthy of swearing- in his case, at least. Because through the jagged hole in the door a shirtless Harry and a rumpled-clothing clad Ginny were enjoying quite the heavy snogging session.

* * *

"Ginevra Weasley!" I thundered, throwing the door open. "Explain yourself! What in Merlin is going on in here?" 

"What does it look like?" the blushing witch mumbled into her boyfriend's muscular-and may I add NAKED?- chest. I heard a derisive snort from my right and prayed fervently that Draco would be able to control himself.

"It looks like YOU TWO," I pointed to each of them in turn, "are out an hour after curfew, engaging in some activities that I'm sure YOUR mother"- I pointed to Ginny- "and not to mention your six brothers would deem inappropriate for a witch of your age."

"You obviously haven't heard what Fred and Angelina did in their sixth year," Ginny informed me. "And Harry and I were just doing a little kissing." Her large, chocolaty brown eyes stared back at me innocently.

"Then why, may I ask, is HARRY'S JUMPER OFF?"

The object-of-Ginny's-snogs, who had been remaining curiously silent until then, spoke up. "I'll have to be blunt about this, Hermione. She ripped it off me in a fit of passion."

"Ginny," I asked sternly, "is this true?"

"Why, HERMIONE!" she said in shock, "I am simply ASTOUNDED! Harry is ALWAYS honest."

"Except for when he lied about fancying you."

"That was an extenuating circumstance."

"And all those times he has withheld information from Dumbledore. And that time he lied to McGonagall about the dragon. And that time..."

"All right," Ginny relented. "He's lied a few times. But 99 percent of the time he's a honest bloke who also happens to be a damn good kisser. I mean..."

"Spare me the details of Harry's bloody brilliant lips which wreak havoc on your senses," I interjected with a groan.

The petite redhead gaped at me.

"How in Godric did you I was going to say that?" she gasped incredulously.

"Because I would use precisely the same words to describe your brother's kissing ability," I said sadly, realizing that it was possible that soon a time would come when I would no longer be able to feel those wonderful lips on mine.

"Ew, ew, EEEWW! I still DO NOT know whatever in Merlin's name you see in that brother of mine. However, he loves you, you love him, and you make the most adorable couple. And I will NOT let that that little slag steal him from you."

"Don't change the subject, young lady," I said half-heartedly, although her proclamation that she was NOT going to let Cassandra take Ron from me made me feel a smidgen better. "How did Harry's shirt leave his upper torso?"

"It's like Harry said." Ginny shrugged. "I really don't understand why you won't believe us, Hermione. Would we lie to you?" One look at her mouth, which was desperately struggling to remain in a neutral line, confirmed my suspicions.

"You are RIDICULOUS," I giggled.

"Why, thank you." She took a mock-bow.

"I have it half in mind to send an owl to your mother straight away and inform her of these shenanigans." I pretended to change my tune and be dead-serious.

"B-but, HERMIONE! Harry and I weren't shagging or anything. And I didn't tear the his jumper off him in a fit of passion- he took it off by himself because he spilled a goblet of pumpkin all over it."

"It was very wet and sticky," Harry added.

I picked up the dark green button-down shirt that Ginny had given him for his birthday, and felt that, indeed, there was a rather large, sticky stain.

"I do think you both know some handy cleaning spells that would've done the job, however."

Ginny rolled her eyes. "Oh, give me a break Hermione. It's not like you never desired to see Ron's bare chest when given the opportunity."

"You're making Harry blush."

"Anyway, you are on NO grounds to reprimand Harry and I for our nightly activities, for YOU TOO are out of bed after curfew. May I ask as to why?"

"Er- I was looking for you two!" I said lamely, using the first excuse that came to mind and earning myself a sharp kick on the shins from Draco.

"You're a dreadful liar, Hermione." Ginny straightened the collar on her blouse. "Whenever you fib, your nostrils flare most unbecomingly."

"With mates like you, I have no choice but to remain moral and upstanding," I whined.

"We try our very best. Now, will you answer my question in the next few seconds? I really have to use the loo."

"You too are a terrible fibber. I know you just want to find a deserted place to continue your lip-lock with your dear bloke. Now, instead, why don't we make a deal? You can go and snog his brains out for all I care, and I'll go and conduct my business. No questions asked. Deal?"

"Yes. But first you and I are going to have a LONG chat as to what you are doing out this late at night, for I DON'T SEE MY BROTHER AROUND!"

I gulped. That discussion would certainly venture onto dangerous grounds.

"How about I take a raincheck until tomorrow?" I pleaded desperately as I watched my close friend move closer and closer to me until our noses were almost touching.

"How about NOT?"

"How about.." She stopped mid-sentence, staring at a spot on the carpet beside me. I slowly moved my gaze down, fearing the worst. And the worst it was. Alas, about half of one of Draco's expensive leather shoe-clad feet was peeking out from beneath the cloak. BLOODY HELL!


	9. Caught!

**Howdy! 42 reviews...down a little from usual, but who am I to complain? However, that does create a slight setback for my goal...I'd really like to have 500 reviews by a few days after posting Chapter 10! (Please don't think I'm review-hungry or anything...it's just a personal aspiration of mine...I've never reached 500 reviews on a story before, seeing as this is only my second major fanfiction, so any help that you could give would be much appreciated! Especially since I'll be posting Chapter 10 around the time HP6 comes out...hitting the big "500" will make that weekend even more memorable for me!) Anyway, I would to extend a ginormous THANK YOU to the following fabulous readers who reviewed Chapter 8: Ayantara, NotThePoke (you totally made my day!Thanks for the incredibly sweet and uplifting review...just whatI needed!),WhiteRoseDancer, Rachel, unknownspeices, Bloody Corsets, RainDateChick, Mariah, MIDNIGHT-PIXIE, xPussyWillowKittenx, kitotterkat, Huggles4All, the-insufferable-know-it-all, Kitty Weasley KW, Lara Potter, N.C. PysChick, PotterFan92, Marina Hydroswim, hrrypttrfan, Aqb Dk, ShadowHexx771, EponineWeasley, Ronsreallove, True Slytherin Witch, Eowyn Organa, aurora-sakura, goblim monkey, Emma-Lynn, dancerrdw, dreamchubb, AngelicOne, NicciBubbles, aishteru, eckles (Sorry I didn't have a chance to respond to your email! I've been so busy packing for my upcoming camping trip and finishing this chapter that I simply didn't have time! I'll get a reply to you when I return home!), FairyPrincess, Endless Potential, Alli-Baby, skysongcry, SilentRaven987, and last, but not least, the fantastic first reviewer, suckr4romance!**

**Look for an update anywhere from Friday toSunday of next weekend! Although I'm sure you'll all be too busy reading Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince... :-). Merlin, I can't wait to read that! But I ammore than a little bit anxious..what if she totally kills off someone important or makes Harry and Ginny and / or Ron and Hermione get together? Then that will be the end of "fluffy, dancing-around-feelings romance fics!" SOB! Anyway, ya'll have fun reading HP6 and I hope you'll read Chapter 10 (and review!) next weekend, even though this fic may very well be way out of canon! **

**As usual, read, review, and above all else, ENJOY!**

* * *

"What is THAT?" Harry asked with disgust, as though the shoe was a particularly smelly piece of human waste. 

"I don't know!" I feigned shock. "Perhaps we should move slowly away from the object in question."

"It looks like a shoe," Ginny said in a hushed whisper.

"A very expensive shoe," Harry added.

"A size eleven shoe," I chimed in.

"Draco Malfoy's shoe!" The three of us screamed in unison as Harry pulled the Invisibility Cloak off. Within one minute, three wands were pointed at his neck- mine a tad bit on the late side.

"What the bloody hell are you doing here, Malfoy!" Harry growled furiously. "With Hermione- and MY Invisibility Cloak!"

""Isn't it obvious what we're doing, Potter? We're having a secret affair under the oblivious nose of the Weasel King." (**A/N: That wonderful line was used with permission from one of eckles's wonderful reviews...you rock, eckles!)** I closed my eyes in utter horror. Those words DID NOT just leave Draco's mouth. There was no possible, logical way.

But, alas, they did.

"WHAT?"

"You sick little basta..."

"You damn ferret..."

"I am going to take pleasure in killing..."

"How dare you...!"

"You're a fu..."

"QUIET!" I yelled. "Throwing insults at Draco isn't going to get you two anywhere."

"DRACO?"

"Er- I mean Malfoy." But the damage had already been done."

"Neither of you," Harry snarled, pointing to the Slytherin and I in turn, "Are putting a TOE outside of this room until you do some explaining." The Boy-Who-Lived was literally shaking with anger.

"I thought I made myself clear, Potter. Your friend here and I are having a torrid love affair under the oblivious nose of your weasel of a best mate."

"Knock it off, Draco," I snapped.

"I knew you were seeing someone behind Ron's back," Ginny hissed. "I knew it. You betrayed Ron. You betrayed me. You betrayed Harry. You betrayed my whole family! You betrayed the WHOLE DAMN WIZARDING WORLD!"

"I didn't betray ANYONE!" I shouted. "If you would just listen to MY side of the story, you would learn the truth!"

"I believe the truth's obvious, Hermione," Harry said furiously. "You're..."

"_Silencio!" _Draco yelled over the extremely irate voices, and then summoned Harry's and Ginny's wands. "Now, that's better."

"I am NOT cheating on Ron. You HAVE to believe me!" I begged my two red faced mates who looked like they were about to have steam coming out of their ears.

"The truth is, Potter and Weasley," Draco hesitated for a moment, so I picked up where he left off.

"Harry and Ginny, Draco..." I looked to the blond bloke for assurance that I was allowed to reveal the following information and received a firm nod in response. Though he had never explicitly told me that I was to keep his "transformation" a secret, it was understood that only under extenuating circumstances was I to tell anyone. I took a deep breath. "Draco has come to the side of good."

Their reactions were just as I had expected. Harry was making some rude, crude, and socially unacceptable hand gestures that demonstrated just how much he really believed that Draco had changed for the better, and Ginny was miming sticking her wand up the bloke-whose-loyalty-was-in-question's buttocks.

I closed my eyes in frustration. "Maturity would be nice about right now." The two continued their actions, however, and completely ignored my words. Harry, being the very intelligent bloke that he is, suddenly got the brainstorm to pick up a piece of parchment and a quill that were both conveniently located on the wooden table beside him (I really despise capabilities of the Room of Requirement sometimes) and scrawled, "My girlfriend and I would act maturely if Malfoy would be so kind as to give back our ability to speak."

"Not a chance, Potter."

I rolled my eyes. "Unfortunately, we are getting nowhere."

"Precisely. Now, here's the deal, Potter. Although I've come to my senses and am a spy for the Order, that does not mean under any circumstances that I will be civil to your or Weasel. Or even, this Weasely, for that matter."

Harry pointed a firm finger at me.

"And why Hermione, you may ask? Because I am doing a favor for her."

"What kind of favor?" Ginny snarled, as I noticed with a shock that she had somehow stolen my wand right out of my hands and quickly performed the counter-spell.

"Every night, I throw her to a bed in a fit of passion and I shag her until she can no longer move."

"Petrificus Totalus!" I shouted.

Ginny grudgingly gave me a nod of approval.

"I surprised you two aren't using even worse spells on me," I remarked dryly. "Considering some of the things Draco has been telling you."

"You really believe we're that DAFT?" Ginny raised an eyebrow dramatically, and Harry followed suit.

"Well.." I began delicately, "You did think I was cheating on Ron."

"Oh, that." Ginny had the grace to blush. "I jumped to conclusions far too soon. I know you would NEVER do that."

"Right," I drawled. "However, what's with the sudden change of heart? Two minutes ago, you and Harry looked like you were about to jointly murder me with your bare hands-screw wands!"

"It was that twitchy little ferret's remark about 'throwing you onto the bed in a fit of passion and shagging you,'" Harry snapped.

"That was the deciding factor," Ginny added her two cents worth. "We know you well, Hermione. You always, always, ALWAYS want to be in control- the one in charge. Thus, if for some odd reason you were engaging in sexual activities with Malfoy, it's safe to say that you would be the one on top." I blanched, a mental image suddenly entering my mind.

"And also the fact that you would never, in your bloody right mind, let Malfoy shag you under any circumstances." Oh, if only you knew, Harry..."Then again, everyone always believed that you would never, in your bloody right mind, associate with this piece of vermin any more than necessary. We've been proved wrong on that particular aspect. Who knows?"

"Sod off, Harry," Ginny said crossly. "There's no need to second-guess yourself. Since when have we believed the word of MALFOY over HERMIONE"S?"

"Since Hermione has picked up this dreadful habit of fraternizing with the ENEMY behind her FRIENDS' BACKS!

"He's not the ENEMY anymore, Harry," I said shrilly.

"Oh? So now he's a FRIEND?"

"Starting to become one..."

"And just when did this happen, Hermione? In the all of two days since we have been back at Hogwarts? Because I remember VERY clearly what happened on the train with that git proclaiming his allegiance to Voldemort and calling you a mud-"

"That was for appearance's sake, Harry." My voice grew louder and louder as the quarrel escalated. "He simply CAN'T let just ANYONE know that he's now loyal to Dumbledore. Do you realize how the consequences of the wrong people learning that could be?"

"Quite dreadful, I'm afraid," Draco said airily.

The Boy-Who-Lived and I turned around to stare at Ginny, who just shrugged her lean shoulders.

"I reckoned he at least deserved a chance to speak for himself. Besides, your row was quickly becoming awfully bothersome."

"You- you're siding with Hermione!" Harry sputtered.

"True," said Ginny breezily. "Because I have complete faith and trust in her. If she is spending time with Malfoy, I am positive it is for a bloody good reason. Which she will be sharing with us VERY shortly!"

"Or perhaps she's under the IMPERIUS CURSE!" Harry suggested wildly.

I fought desperately not to roll my eyes.

"Or perhaps I am helping her save her relationship with your prat of a best mate," Draco interjected rather loudly.

There was a resounding "huh?" from my companions.

"He's helping me keep Cassandra away from Ron," I elaborated. "_With little in the way of success,"_ I thought ruefully.

Harry's emerald eyes bugged out. "You mean to tell me that out of all the people at Hogwarts you choice HIM to help save your love life?"

"Well, I really had no choice..." I stammered.

"It's like this, Potter. I don't like Cassandra. I don't like Weasley. As a matter of fact, I don't like you either."

"So you're doing this for the benefits," Ginny eyes narrowed as she figured out his plan. "You'll try to seduce Cassandra, which will make HER mad, and Ron will be mad at you for taking his new "friend" away, although he'll try to conceal it."

"That's not much in the way of benefits," Harry pointed out thoughtfully.

"I'm not doing this just for those benefits!" Draco hissed. "Cassandra has to be kept away from Ron at all costs- or else TERRIBLE things will happen!"

"Cut out the dramatics, Malfoy," Ginny snorted. "We all know you don't aid ANYONE in need without some ulterior motive. In fact, you never help anyone. Period."

"And since when did you care what happened to Ron- or Hermione for that matter?" Harry challenged his nemesis, emerald eyes flashing.

"Oh, it's no use." I threw up my hands in frustration. "Clearly, Harry you are not going to listen to reason."

"No, I'm not going to," he agreed snidely. "Now, if you'll excuse us, Ginny and I will don MY Invisibility Cloak and sneak back to the Common Room, leaving you two to your own devices."

"One of the best ideas you've had in a while, Potty. Do go ahead."

I slowly sank down to the ground. My alliance with Draco had nearly caused me a friendship (Harry's- Ginny's anger wasn't directed towards me- only Draco- although she was obviously pondering my poor lack of judgment in placing my faith in him. As was I, at times...).

* * *

"Damn, Granger, you have some temperamental friends."

"Are you going to turn against me too?" I asked wearily in a muffled voice. "Because if you haven't noticed, it's because of YOU that Harry is currently not on the best terms with me."

"Nah. Using your last name just sounded better in the particular sentence."

"That's good to know."

"Now, are you going to sit here all night, wallowing in your grief because your precious Potter is a smidgen angered towards you? And me," he added as an afterthought. "But then again, he always is. So it's nothing to be surprised about."

"Yes, I am." I snapped. "So if you value certain male body parts, I would strongly advise that you leave me alone. Or else, TRUST me, I will castrate you with my own two hands using a butcher knife that will magically appear in this room because I really, really want it. And no pain-numbing spell."

"You're quite feisty this late at night, Hermione," Draco said almost in awe. "It's a pity I've never had the chance..."

I picked the knife up and held it threateningly over his crotch. "Don't make me do this," I said in a deathly whisper.

"It would be amusing to see you try," he chortled. "But, alas, there will be time for that later."

"Unfortunately, there just may be," I sighed, burying my head in my knees. "Seeing as I may not have any better candidates to spend time with. Harry will be ignoring me, and Ron..." I paused, unexpected tears clouding my vision, "Ron will be drooling over that b-with-an-itch-of-a-witch."

"Please don't cry!" The sexy Seeker said in an odd sort of voice. "I'm not too good at giving comfort."

"I'm not crying," I took a deep breath and wiped my eyes. "Especially in front of you!"

"You know, it still bewilders me how after six years of animosity, you and I are sitting in the same room, without throwing curses at each other," he remarked wryly.

"Same here," I yawned. "I honestly don't know what came over me that morning, but something made me trust you- my sworn enemy for six years and the son of Voldemort's right hand man." Draco visibly flinched at hearing the name of the Dark Lord.

"Do you..." I began hesitatingly.

"Have the Dark Mark?" He finished gruffly. "Yes, I do. Or else there's no way I would be allowed into those top-secret meetings that the Order gains SO much information from."

"What are you ever going to do if..."

"I have to fight versus the Order? Reveal my betrayal to the dark side, obviously. It won't matter then, however."

"Why?"

He smiled grimly. "Because the next battle will be the last battle, Hermione. The Final Battle. The duel that will decide the fate of man. It's quickly approaching."

"And Harry's mad at me," I cried in a soft voice.

Draco's whole face softened. "I won't pretend to like Potter, because I really don't. Even if he is our only hope. The one who will save us all. However, I do apologize for his current anger towards you."

"It's not ALL your fault," I admitted grudgingly, rising to my feet. "I reckon we should be heading back to our respective dormitories soon."

"Agreed." We snuck out of the Room of Requirement and jogged as quietly as possible down the corridor.

"Really-wish-Potter-left-his-cloak-with-us!" My companion wheezed through ragged breaths.

"For being such a Quidditch star, I'm surprised you're not in better shape," I chuckled.

"Aw, sod..." the bloke broke off, pulling me hard against the wall. Sensing his sudden anxiety, I efficiently unlit my wand, throwing us into complete and utter darkness.

"Really, Severus, do you really think this is necessary?" We heard the unmistakable voice of Professor McGonagall inquire from further down the corridor.

I stared at Draco, trepidation all over my face, as I heard the footsteps come closer and closer. We were SITTING DUCKS! Discovery by McGonagall and Snape would not be amusing in the least.What in Merlin were we going to do NOW?

* * *

**The big 500!**


	10. Of Broom Closets and Draco Malfoy

**Wheee! 52 reviews! First I would like to thank all the fabulous reviewers who left a comment on Chapter 9! A huge thank-you goes out to: Siriuslyhermione, FairyKisses, kitotterkat, Airi Fairy, Mariah, Who cares what my name is, goblin monkey, unknownspecies, Lara Potter, MrsPadfootVerona, True Slytherin Witch, quidditchgirl13, GreenEyes, MysteryALASKA, lacatamar, NinitademiBrooke, aurora-sakura, LadySimone123, SnowAngel, RandomSmirf13, waterfaerie15, dreamchubb, Ellie, Aqb Dk, N.C.PysChick, Emma-Lynn, aishteru, FairyKisses, Elemental Water Mistress, AGoofyWriter, eckles, EmilyEB, Alli-Baby, MIDNIGHT-PIXIE, Lucy, Huggles4All, SilentRaven987, RainDateChick, hrrypttrfan, Angel-4rom-heaven, ****the-insufferable-know-it-all, xPussyWillowKittenx, NicciBubbles, GerardWay'sFanClub, Eowyn Organa, skysongcry, EponineWeasley, NotThePoke, dancerdw, RubyPhoenixFire, suckr4romance, Ronsreallove, and last, but not least, the first reviewer Sweetdeath04!**

**I do apologize for the late update, but I figured most of you were engrossed in HPB anyway...sighs...that book was most disturbing as so STRANGE and...I dunno...it was a little disappointing at times. All around, I still enjoyed it, I reckoned. I would love to talk about it with any of you great reviewers- most of my friends either don't read Harry Potter or haven't finished the sixth book yet, so please, I would enjoy chatting with someone willing to discuss it- my screename (AIM and AOL) is cellolover17!**

**Because I was so disturbed by the sixth book, for a while I didn't think I really wanted to continue fanfiction..especially since this one is SO ridiculously out of canon now- however, I think most of us- or at least I- need some humor after reading that deep, angst-ridden book. So, even if no one else reads the rest of my story, I'm at least supplying humor and a bit of comfort to myself, if you know what I mean.**

**Anyway, as usual, please read and enjoy this chapter! I'd really appreciate if you would leave a review if you feel that this chapter is worthy of one :-) I'm still striving for that 500!**

**I would like to dedicate this chapter to xhorseriderx4, who I chatted with online last night and gave me some great suggestions for my story!**

* * *

"Broom closet. Pronto." I suddenly found myself dragged by a pair of muscular arms about a foot down the hallway and shoved into a very small, cramped enclosed area. The broom closet, obviously. I could hear Draco's every heavy breath, seeing as I was literally sitting in his lap. _'This is rather nice,'_ that annoying voice in my head snickered.

"If we're caught, then just play along." Draco's breath tickled my ear.

"No, really? I reckoned in that instance I would just lean over and snog your brains out. That would certainly improve the circumstances, wouldn't it?" I said rather snidely. I was NOT in a good mood. Not in a good mood AT ALL, for I was allowing my mind to freely run through all the repercussions of being discovered in broom closet with Draco Malfoy. And not only in a broom closet with Draco Malfoy at half past eleven at night, but SITTING VERY INTIMATELY ON HIS LAP! I could clearly imagine Snape's gleeful smile and his sarcastic drawl: "Well, well, well. Look what we have here..."

Draco elbowed me HARD in the side as the voices drew closer and closer, as if to remind me to not make a single noise. I rolled my eyes. One word. Men. They always underestimate the intelligence of we women.

"Yes, this is necessary, Minerva," Snape snapped from what seemed to be right outside of our hiding spot. "Parkinson swears she saw Potter and Weasley sneaking into the Room of Requirement over an hour ago! Who knows what could be going on right now?"

"This is what you summoned me out of my quarters at this ungodly hour of the night for?" Came Professor McGonagall's incredulous voice. I stifled a giggle. Only Professor McGonagall would consider 11:00 to be an "ungodly hour of the night."

"I highly doubt you were doing anything of importance," he sneered. "Probably just reading one of those bloody Warlock Holmes books all those Muggles love."

"_Sher_lock Holmes, Severus. If you are going to insult my choice of literature, then please at least use the correct name!" Minerva McGonagall rocks. End of discussion.

"Now if you'll excuse me, I am returning to bed at once. I don't know what in Merlin possessed me to follow you before hearing an explanation..."

"You're not going anywhere, Minerva, until I'm finished with you."

"The last time I checked, I don't have to obey your commands." I could imagine the Transfiguration Professor's nostrils flaring in their most unbecoming way as she spoke.

"But it would do you good to obey my wishes for just this once. Just this once, Minerva."

"And what if I am disinclined to acquiesce your request?" Ah, yes. An unlikely fellow fan of the Muggle movie "_Pirates of the Caribbean."_

"For the sake of Godric, Helga, Rowena, and Slytherin, just listen to me for thirty seconds. That's all I'm asking for."

Professor McGonagall yawned loudly. "My goodness! I am most dreadfully tired. I do think it would be best if I retired to bed right now."

"Do me a favor and never, ever, EVER become one of those bloody Muggle actresses. It is quite obvious that you are not in the least bit sleepy. I can read you like an open book, Minerva: Murdo is coming to your quarters tonight! That is why you are so anxious to get away from me!"

"Keep your voice down!" McGonagall hissed. "And stop using Legilimens to your advantage!"

"There's not a student in sight," Snape said lazily, "to hear about your upcoming sexual endeavors."

"You make it sound as though I'm a SCARLET WOMAN!" My favorite teacher said furiously. "He's my husband, for Merlin's sake! Can't I shag him?"

If it wasn't for Draco's strong hand covering my mouth, I surely would've burst out with crazy laughter at that point. However, there was a problem quickly approaching that Draco strong hand couldn't halt: the fact that I was about to pee my knickers from shaking so hard in silent giggles!

"I have to pppppeeeeee," I moaned in a muffled voice into Draco's left ear.

"Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn," he snapped quite rudely.

"Shag him all you want, Minerva. I'm surely not stopping you. One thing is bewildering me, though. Why did you come along with me if the first place if your lover if visiting your bed?"

"He's not coming until midnight," she sputtered, I'm sure blushing a healthy shade of red. "And I came with you to pass the time beforehand. And to see what interested you so. And to keep my nerves from shattering. However, when I realized that you were going to spy on Harry Potter and Ginerva Weasley..."

"This surely cannot be the first time he's ravished you," Snape hastily interrupted. "You have no reason to be nervous."

"I am anxious concerning his safety in his journeys! For Merlin's sake, Severus, I haven't seen him for nearly two weeks- he's been practically living at the Ministry-what if I never see him again? Also, seeing as you have had no experience in the romance department, I fail to comprehend how you could make a remark such as that."

"I've had much more experience than you- or anyone else, for that matter-know!"

"Forgive me if I do not believe that statement. I don't recall you being involved in ANY relationships during your years at Hogwarts."

"That's because that damn, arrogant Potter stole any girl I fancied and shagged her on the spot! He slept with every girl in our year except for Bella and Narcissa!"

"Do you really believe that?" McGonagall inquired softly.

"And his son is following in his footsteps..." Snape continued his rant, ignoring his colleague.

"You fancy Ginerva Weasley?"

"Excuse me?"

That did it. A slow trickle of urine was beginning to seep into my knickers.

"Draco...HELP!" I pleaded desperately.

"Do I have to do everything for you?' He sighed, fortunately quietly, and muttered a quick spell under his breath and waved his wand in my general area of distress. Immediately my problem was solved. I breathed a deep sigh of relief.

"Let me guess," I muttered out of the corner of my mouth. "You learned that from the Death Eaters too?"

"Yes. Drying up the bladder does come in handy sometimes, especially during battles. It's a terrible tactical maneuver to turn your back on your opponent so you can take a..."

"Enough!"

"However, there is one side effect: once the spell wears off in less than a hour, you will be visiting the loo in high frequencies."

"Amusing. Thank you very much for sharing that with me," I whispered.

"I do NOT fancy Ginerva Weasley," the greasy-haired git growled, bringing our attention back to the rather interesting discussion that was taking place a mere four feet away from us.

"Well, you DID say that James stole every girl you ever fancied and shagged her on the spot, and then you mentioned that Harry was following in his father's footsteps! So it's only logical to believe that since you obviously think that Harry is shagging Ginerva, you indeed fancy her!"

Draco turned to me, confusion across his handsome face. I, on the other hand, understood McGonagall's logic perfectly. I shook my head. Once again, MEN!

"You're extremely daft," I said quietly. Unfortunately not quiet enough, as I would learn a few seconds later.

"You are quite mistaken," Snape said silkily, "If you think I fancy Potter's little girlfriend..." He stopped in mid-thought.

Bloody hell.

"Did you just hear a distinctly feminine voice say, "you're extremely daft?" He asked his companion.

"No, I did not. I do believe that you are hearing things, Severus. Might I suggest taking one of those sanity potions you always brag about?"

"I'm not hearing little voices in my head!" The spy snapped. "There's someone in the broom closet- two people, actually."

"And I'm supposed to believe the wizard who makes wild accusations about noble, honorable Harry Potter engaging in inappropriate activities with his girlfriend?"

"Noble and honorable my arse. There's two students in the broom closet, after curfew, doing Merlin knows what! We must take action!"

"Oh, I don't think it's too serious, Severus. You ought to stop making such a big deal out of a small thing. Or, as the old Muggle saying goes, "making a mountain out of a mole hill."

"This is no frivolous matter, Minerva! Those two students are breaking around a thousand Hogwarts school rules. Are you going to just let that slide by?"

"Well, no, but..."

I could imagine Snape's cold eyes narrowing in suspicion.

"You think it's Potter and Weasley in there," he snarled. "You're trying to protect them and not be proved wrong by ME!"

All the time that they were debating about the occupants of the broom closet, Draco and I were doing some quick thinking. And, Merlin, did I really appreciate his intelligence and training with how he handled what unfolded next.

He flitted his wand over my hair, changing it to a straight, coal black, and mumbled some spell in the general direction of my face.

"Pretend you're enjoying this," he whispered, before crashing his lips onto mine just as the door of the closet swung open."

* * *

Pretend you're enjoying this? Heck, I WAS enjoying being snogged by the sexy Slytherin. Even if it was all just an act. His lips wreaked havoc on my senses and made every nerve in my body tingle most deliciously. However, something held me back from responding. As electrifying as his kiss was, it lacked a very important feeling that all of Ron's kisses had in great amounts: true, pure love. I settled for linking my arms around his neck and pulling his body closer to mine as the kiss deepened.

"Mr. Malfoy! Miss Valet! I am absolutely astounded!" Snape gasped.

I took a deep breath as Draco's talented lips left mine. It was time to see if my acting skills were less atrocious as my fibbing. Since the fourth year, when Ron fell for that French bimbo, Fleur, I had been teaching myself the French language, to discover what attracted him so (besides her looks, of course). I put on my most Cass-Ass-y face and prayed feverishly that it would work.

"I am absolutely astounded myself, Professor Snape." I adopted my best French accent. "This bloke here just dragged me into this broom closet and started passionately snogging me! Not that I'm complaining, however...Draco is VERY experienced."

Oh boy. There was going to be hell to pay the next time I was alone with Draco.

"Is this true, Draco?" the head of his house asked tightly.

"Yes, sir," Draco bowed his head in shame. "I simply could not control my lustful urges, so I yanked her into this most convenient closet before I ravished her on the spot."

I heard a VERY loud gasp from Professor McGonagall at his words.

"Why did you two have to interrupt us?" I pouted. The more detentions Cassandra got from this escapade, the better. "Draco was just about to..."

"Enough," Professor McGonagall thundered. "This is growing more and more ridiculous by the moment. Mr. Malfoy, you should know by now that you are NOT allowed to be wandering the corridors after curfew- nor ravishing witches in broom closets. You will serve two weeks of detention with ME! And Miss Valet, although you are new to this school, I'm sure you reviewed the list of rules and regulations I gave you on my first day and know very well that doing anything- especially sexual activities- outside of your dormitory after curfew is strictly forbidden."

"Does that mean Draco and I can continue this inside his dormitory?" I asked gleefully. Merlin, acting like that little slag was FUN!

"No, that does not mean that you can continue this inside his dormitory," my favorite teacher said angrily. "That means that YOU will also have two weeks of detention with me. And an additional three days with Professor Snape for your cheek."

A wonderful thought popped into my head.

"But Professor," I did my best to pretend to be crest-fallen, "Quidditch tryouts are next Friday! I can't miss those! I really want to be Gryffindor's Seeker!"

"Mr. Potter has that position filled quite nicely. And you should've thought of that before rendezvousing with Mr. Malfoy. Now, off to bed you two, before I am forced to give you detention for the rest of the year! And Professor Dumbledore WILL be hearing about this!" She called after us.

After saying a quick goodnight to Draco (and having him perform the counter appearance spell on me- I didn't fancy looking like Cassandra any longer) I sprinted as fast as my legs could carry me to the Gryffindor tower.

"Clever Miss Granger, very clever," a low voice came out of the shadows as I neared the portrait of the Fat Lady. Severus Snape stood there with a smirk, arms folded calmly across his chest.

"What do you mean 'clever'?" I snapped, knowing fully well that he had seen through my disguise.

"You know what I speak of."

"I know no such thing."

"Fine. Then I will have to hear an explanation of what YOU believe gives you the right to freely wander around Hogwarts after lights out. And then I will have to punish you with multiple detentions.

I couldn't think of a single excuse. Snape took my silence as a confirmation.

"You better watch yourself, Miss Granger." He walked towards me, black robes billowing. "You don't know what you're getting yourself into." And with those final words, he departed.

I stared after him, puzzled, and was still pondering what his words meant (and spazzing out more than a tad at the fact that he knew it was actually me in the closet, snogging Draco Malfoy!) as I crawled through the portrait hole.

"Well, well, well. She finally arrives. With swollen lips, no less."


	11. Concerning Draco's Lips

**Teehee! I'm VERY happy that so many of you awesome reviewers stuck around and continued reading this story, even after the sixth book came out :-). I would like to thank those 37 WONDERFUL people who left very uplifting, encouraging comments on Chapter 10: SafetyXPins,silktophat, Angel-4rom-heaven, kitotterkat, AragornLover, xPussyWillowKittenx, Sing-my-heart-out, GreenEyes, bluewaterdemoness, EponineWeasley, Aqb dk, MrsPadfootVerona, mywrldmyrulez, the-insufferable-know-it-all, FairyKisses, Kitty Weasley KW, God..., KrAzYLiKeAFoX, goblin monkey, SilentRaven987, MAGSTER, aliecat, Elemental Water Mistress, True Slytherin Witch, sailorstarryeyes, N.C. PysChick, NicciBubbles, Eowyn Organa, dancerrdw, aishteru, Lara Potter,HiddenSmile, AngelicOne, RandomSmirf13, skysongcry, quidditchgirl13, and last, but certainly not least, NinitademiBrooke! You guys all ROCK!**

**Hmmm...well, there's not much to say except for how appreciative I am of you guys and gals whoare still enjoying this story, even though it's terribly AU...! Again, thank you VERY MUCH!**

**I will dedicate the next chapter to the 500th reviewer, whoever he or she may be! So as usual, read, review, and ENJOY!**

* * *

"Keep your voice down, Ginny," I said rather crossly 

"No, I think I'm going to keep on speaking at the same volume," she snapped.

"B-b-but Harry and Ron! They might hear us!" I whispered.

"Ron has been asleep for ages. Harry went up to bed about ten minutes ago. There's unfortunately no one in the Common Room to hear your bloody excuses except for me. Now, WHERE WERE YOU?"

"I am under no obligation to answer you, for this is a violation of my privacy."

"Don't dance around the issue, Hermione. It makes you look guilty. Which, by the way, you darn are! What took you SO LONG? Having too much fun snogging Ferret Boy?"

A lovely bright red blush very quickly rose on my face, confirming Ginny's suspicions.

"I am anxiously awaiting yet another clever excuse concerning your association with our favorite Death Eater."

I threw my hands up in despair.

"Why should I even attempt to explain the whole story to you? It's so ludicrous that you won't believe me!"

"Try me," Ginny practically growled.

I took a deep breath. "Fine. After you and Harry left, with the Invisibility Cloak, I may remind you, Draco and I began sneaking down the hallway back to our dormitories."

"Together?"

"Yes, together! We didn't have much of a choice."

"Hmmpphh..."

"However, we soon realized that Snape and McGonagall were headed our way!"

"So, you did the first logical thing that would come to mind and immediately pretended that you were doing Prefect rounds."

"With Draco Malfoy? At half-past eleven? You know as well as I do, Ginny, that even Prefects can't walk around the school that late."

The petite redhead scowled.

"Having no other choice, Draco dragged me into the nearest broom closet."

"How convenient. But you resisted, I assume?"

I gave her the evil eye.

"You didn't!" My close friend gasped incredulously. "You actually got in a broom closet with DRACO MALFOY?"

"As difficult as that may be to believe, I certainly did, seeing as I didn't fancy being given a year's worth of detention from Snape and McGonagall."

"True." came her very reluctant voice.

"Anyway," I continued, "Draco and I heard a very interesting discussion about Professor McGonagall's love life, Snape's lack thereof, and the presumption that you and Harry shag. But there's not need to discuss that. After all, I highly doubt you will believe any word that comes out of my mouth. So why should I waste my time?"

"Me and Harry- shagging?" Ginny sputtered, her face a flaming red.

My mouth dropped open, and in a fairly good imitation of Ginny, if I say so myself, I gasped incredulously. "YOU DIDN'T!"

"I did..." Ginny began, dropping her red head in shame...

"Bloody hel..."

"n't! But I have considered it before...wait, why am I telling you this?" The youngest Weasley said angrily, pointing a finger accusingly in my direction. "You purposely made me digress from our very important topic of discussion."

I rolled my eyes. "It was you, not I, who digressed. However, would you like me to continue?"

"Obviously," she snapped.

"So, Draco and I were commenting on the conversation..."

"That's exactly what I would do in a situation like that," Ginny said very sarcastically. "I mean, voices NEVER alert one to your presence."

"...When I accidentally said, 'you're extremely daft' in a rather loud voice, and of course, Snape just HAD to hear it. It was hilarious- McGonagall thought he was hallucinating!"

"I'm sure it was most amusing. Really wish I could've been there."

"Then Snape, with a growing suspicion, decided to throw open the closet door. Having all of five seconds to concoct a plan, Draco performed a nifty little spell that gave me coal-black hair...

"Cassandra," Ginny whispered with barely-concealed hate.

"Yes, Cassandra," I sighed. "I have to admit, it was quite enjoyable, pretending to be that little slag."

"What happened next?" The sister of the object of my affections breathed.

I fought back a grin. It almost seemed as though Ginny was kinda hanging onto my every word- which indicated that there was a chance she actually believed me. Either that or my tale was rather enthralling.

"H-h-he kissed me," I winced as Ginny studied my face with an odd sort of expression. "B-but I didn't kiss back! Trust me! It was all an act on both of our parts."

"Is he a good kisser?" The beautiful witch asked in a strangled sort of voice.

"Well, yes," I admitted, furrowing my brow at her reaction to that news. "Er, I don't mean to push my luck or anything, but just one minute ago you looked as though you fancied using your infamous "Bat-Bogey hex" on me. And now you're asking about Draco's kissing ability?"

"I've been watching your nostrils closely- and they weren't flaring," she said calmly, still staring at me. "Which means you were telling the honest-to-Godric truth- the whole time!"

"I'm glad my nostrils are good for something." I let a small smile work its way across my face.

"Give me details," suggested Ginny casually. "Answering "yes" to my question of 'is he a good kisser?' does not suffice!"

"This is coming from the same girl who was about to murder me on the spot from just FRATERNIZING with Draco? For Merlin's sake, I don't think you DESERVE to hear the details."

"Oh, you'll tell me," the petite redhead said cheerfully, "Or else I will inform my dear brother of just what you do when he's in bed."

"Are you blackmailing me, Ginevra Weasley?" I frowned.

"Of course." Her smile widened as she leaned forward. "Now share with me all the juicy things.."

I still wasn't convinced at her sudden change. "You're going to use this against me, somehow." I folded my arms across my not-so-voluptuous chest (GRRR! I am 17 years old and still waiting for that bloody chest of mine to stop being so darn stubborn and actually GROW, so I will not longer hold the nickname of "Boobless Bookworm"-created by Pansy Parkinson in the fifth year).

"Hermione, I thought I made this clear. Yes, I was mad when you first came into the Common Room, but as the story came out- with no flaring nostrils-, I realized that you only pulled that charade because you REALLY, REALLY had to. And the same goes for associating with Malfoy. Period. Desperate times call for desperate measures, as that old saying goes. And also, if this makes you feel any better, if Malfoy pulled ME into a broom closet and was forced to kiss me as a cover, I sure as hell wouldn't be putting up any resistance!"

"Me either," an amused voice piped in. I whirled around, and to my utter horror saw a figure lurking in one shadowy corner. A figure with a head full of beautiful, curly, coal-black hair...which could only mean one person...

Parvati. Wait.. _Parvati?_ I couldn't believe that fate had _actually dealt me a good hand._ The first time for 5 hours!

"P-parvati!" I sputtered. "What did you do to your hair? And I'm going to kick your sorry arse in about five seconds!"

"Oh, you thought I was Cassandra for a minute there, didn't you?" She smirked, perfectly reading my mind. "I began to get very, very, VERY bored up in the dormitory, because you seemed to be taking an awfully long time to return from detention, so I experimented with some new spells on my hair. Do you like it?"

"It makes you look like that b-with-an-itch-of-a-witch," I grumbled. "And you honestly didn't have to wait up for me."

"Ah, it was no problem." She waved her hand with a flourish. "I couldn't fall asleep anyway- I was having this VERY steamy daydream about Dean..."

Ginny snorted. "I should warn you beforehand, Parvati, that's Dean's rubbish at kissing."

"There's no WAY he can be anything short of wonderful," the Indian beauty pouted. "With those big pouty lips..."

I pretended to gag. "Let's please refrain from discussing the lips of any blokes right now," I begged.

Ginny flashed me a sly grin. "Hermione's still in shock from a bit of a shocking, rare experience she just had. She lowered her voice drastically. "She was kissed by Draco Malfoy!"

"Bloody," Parvati breathed, staring at me in wonder. "You got to feel Malfoy's lips on your own?"

"Yes, yes," I yawned, as thought it was nothing. "I don't see what the big deal is."

"The big deal, Hermione," she began earnestly, "is that no Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, or Ravenclaw girl of any year has EVER been had the pleasure of being snogged by Malfoy!"

"So?" I snickered under my breath, for I knew fully well what she was speaking of. Even though I always had my nose buried in books whenever I was around those two in previous years, I had half-paid attention to their sometimes VERY enlightening discussions pertaining to (what else?) but blokes! And hot blokes in particular. Such as Malfoy from fourth year on.

"So?" My door-mate mimicked. "I don't think you understand! You have done something that no one in three houses has ever done! You're not leaving this room until both Ginny and I get some details. And when I say details, I MEAN detailed DETAILS!"

"First, before I say anything, I am putting a Silencing Charm on the Common Room so certain people will not overhear us." I waved my wand and conjured the charm quite efficiently. "Then, I will ask you Parvati, that instead of a lecture of how I should only let my boyfriend kiss me, I am sensing wild enthusiasm emanating from you?"

"Because I know you would never let ANY other bloke than Ron do something like that unless you were in a VERY sticky situation. And when I mean sticky, I mean VERY sticky."

"Does about to be discovered by both McGonagall and Snape, sitting quite cozily on his lap in a broom closet count as sticky?"

"Definitely!" She shrieked, practically bouncing out of her seat (a red and gold armchair). All I can say is that Parvati gets a smidgen too excited when it comes to hearing about other people's romantic adventures.

I spent the next five minutes summarizing the whole story to her, for I had resigned myself to the fact that if I didn't tell her now, she'd bug me at the most inappropriate moment (i.e., in earshot of Ron!).

"Bloody brilliant," the elder Patil twin sighed after I had got to the point where Draco smashed his mouth against mine.

"Well yes, it was," I admitted. "But not nearly as nice as Ron's kisses- because his are actually full of pure, true love."

There was a resounding chorus of, "awes."

"It's TRUE," I said rather defensively. "While he does indeed have a talented mouth, nothing beats Ron. Nothing. Nothing at all. Wouldn't you say the same?"

"Well, I can't say I would agree with that," Parvati giggled, "seeing as I have neither been kissed by Malfoy or Ron. However, I would place my bets on that darn sexy Slytherin as to who would make my head spin."

"I can't say I would agree with that either, seeing as I don't fancy having an incestuous relationship with my brother." Ginny looked rather ill at the mere thought of that. "However, no matter how experienced that git of a prat is, nothing beats my Harry." Her deep brown eyes took on a rather dreamy expression at that.

"Oh, puh-lease," Parvati made a noise of disgust. "I just have to be talking to two love-sick bimbos..."

My temper flared immediately. "Do not call me a BIMBO!" I hissed. "You may address me by any other name, but NOT BIMBO! Call me "Boobless Bookworm," even. Just not BIMBO! I don't want to be associated with the likes of that piece of vermin!"

Ginny did a rather impressive Umbridge impression- so realistic that in fact Parv and I each jumped about five feet in the air.

"Ladies, ladies, ladies," she tutted sadly. "This is not getting us anywhere."

"Correct. That, I think, is an indication that we should all go to bed." I rose to my feet, and just as I was about to start the interminable journey up the Girl's Staircase...

"Pajama party, eh?" Came a low male voice. One that did NOT sound too happy. Not happy AT ALL. And it only got worse when the owner of the voice came into view. Oh, woe was me! One word...DAMN!

* * *

**A/N: I do apologize for the whole "whose voice is that?" cliffhanger, seeing as my last chapter ended the same way..however, a writer's gotta do what a writer's gotta do...**

**Coming up next Saturday...Chapter 12! By the way, I plan on continuing this fiction until I run out of ideas or you guys get sick and tired of it! **


	12. Of Colette and Clarice

**Yowsers! Over 60 REVIEWS! I am ASTOUNDED and THRILLED BEYOND BELIEF! A HUGE thank you goes out to the following people who left very encouraging and warm comments on Chapter 11: Eowyn Organa, astraeos, HPLover1994, waterfaerie15, Darkmoonfang, goblin monkey, Lara Potter, madammarauder, Rozie, sailorstarryeyes, MIDNIGHT-PIXIE, Sing-my-heart-out, kitotterkat, A tragic Romance, Rachel, suckr4romance, LadySimone123, Elemental Water Mistress, the-insufferable-know-it-all, MysteryALASKA, unknownspeices, FairyKisses, aurora-sakura, Kitty Weasley KW, The Gray Witch, Ronsreallove, N.C. PysChick, aishteru, Tria Marie Val, RandomSmirf13, WhiteRoseDancer, MAGSTER, xhorseriderx4, AngelicOne, Lumos2000, hermione2, sheltielover, skysongcry, Aqb Dk, siktophat, NintademiBrooke, Endless Potential, True Slytherin Witch, Hufflepuff Queen, dreamchubb, NicciBubbles, xthedramaqueenx, xPussyWillowKittenx, dancerrdw, eckles, quidditchgirl13, and last, but certainly not least, Lucy!**

**I would like to dedicate this chapter to skysongcry, the 500th reviewer! You rock! **

**I know some of you have raised concerns about Hermione's actions concerning Draco- and I definitely agree with your opinions. It isn't right to "cheat" on one's boyfriend / girlfriend for ANY reason, nor is it right to fantasize, talk about Draco's lips, etc. Hermione IS being quite foolish and frankly, a bit stupid. However, it will eventually CATCH UP TO HER. I PROMISE. By no means through this story am I saying that the kind of things Hermione's doing and thinking are justified and moral. She is making serious mistakes, and she will soon feel the repercussions from them. There is NO way she will get off the hook. There are consequences for every action. **

**As usual, read, review and ENJOY this chapter! I will dedicate the next chapter to the 600th reviewer!**

**Note: My "Quick Edit" function isn't working on so if anything looks strange in this chapter, it's because I didn't get a chance to preview it.**

I quickly took the Silencing Charm off the area by waving my wand behind my back before saying a single word to my boyfriend, clad in (my cheeks became rosy as I noticed this) only a pair of blue plaid pajama bottoms.

"Ron!" I said with great surprise, jumping to my feet. "What are YOU doing down here? And why do you sound so...disturbed?"

"I couldn't sleep." He flashed me his infamous lopsided grin. "And I am unhappy because you three girls are clearly having a pajama party and didn't invite me!"

I rolled my eyes. Sometimes I really wondered about Ron's intelligence.

"Do you notice me wearing any pajamas?" I raised an eyebrow.

I shivered as his eyes lazily raked over my body.

"Nope," he said breezily. "However, you always have to be different, Hermione. That's one of the things I love most about you."

My heart literally melted at those words. Parvati and Ginny, on the other hand, were doing crude imitations of someone with a bad case of the stomach flu. Hmmph. Whose side were they on?

"We'll leave you two lovebirds to it, then." Ginny winked. "Don't stay up too late and please refrain from shagging in the Common Room."

"Good night to you too," I grumbled.

"So..." Ron said huskily.

"So..." I mimicked him.

"I'm all alone with my girlfriend in the middle of the night in the Common Room. Whatever shall we do?"

"Go to bed."

"Together?" The redhead bloke pretended to be shocked. "Hermione, I do wonder sometimes where your mind is..."

"Right now my mind is in the Land of Sleep," I mumbled. "But my body is not. Thus, I am having difficulty comprehending anything you say and should also not be held responsible for any words that issue from my overly large mouth." What a load of dragon dung. I was bright-eyed and bushy-tailed and not in the least bit fatigued. I was just experiencing a tad bit of discomfort of being around my boyfriend when less than an hour ago I had engaged in lip-lock with a bloke who was certainly NOT Ronald Weasley.

"Well, before you go to bed, can I at least get a kiss good night?"

"Er- NO!" I said a bit loudly and coughed rather dramatically. "Er- I think I'm coming down with the sniffles." In truth, however, I was coming down with a serious case of "guilt-itis." WHY, FOR MERLIN'S SAKE, DID I LET DRACO MALFOY KISS ME? That would've been bad enough, normally, but I HAD A BOYFRIEND AT THE TIME (11:30)! ONE WHO LOVED ME VERY MUCH (and still does!) OH MERLIN, MERLIN, MERLIN...WHAT IN GODRIC'S NAME WAS I THINKING? I COULDN'T KISS RON...NOT AFTER MY LIPS HAD BEEN DEVOURED BY ANOTHER MAN!

"You were perfectly fine earlier this evening," Ron said suspiciously. "Do you not WANT TO KISS ME?"

"I do, really!" I squeaked. "It's just that..."

"Ahem." Oh, of course. She ALWAYS came at the exact, perfect moment.

"Problems, Ronald?" Cassandra asked breathily, sauntering towards us in her scandalizingly skimpy red nightgown.

"Er- no," he stammered, the tips of his ears turning a dark red.

"What are YOU doing down here?" I said a bit harsher than I meant to. After all, it would only turn Ron against me more if I was rude to his new "friend."

"I do believe that I have every right to be down here," she smiled coldly. I looked at Ron, expecting a reaction at her blatant unkindness towards his GIRLFRIEND. However, he was ogling her-or to be more precise, her ample chest.

"Of course you do." My voice simply oozed with sweetness. "I was just wondering WHY you're down here."

"I couldn't sleep." That perked Ron up right away.

"Really? Neither could I! We have something in common." _In about five seconds, you'll have even more in common when I place a most lovely Bat-Bogey Hex on the two of you._

"Perhaps I could help you sleep, Ronald," Cassandra purred, running a hand down his left arm.

"Excuse me," I hissed, my cover forgotten. "Just how are you going to help him sleep?"

"Oh, I know MANY ways," she said suggestively, staring at him straight in the eye.

"Now, if you think for one second that you are going to do anything of the sexual nature with MY boyfriend, you have another one coming," I snapped furiously, stomping right up to her and pointing my finger in her made-up face.

"Your girlfriend is highly excitable, Ronald," the Ice Princess tinkled, fixing me with a look of pity. "Perhaps you should see about getting a Tranquilizing Potion for her from Professor Snape. It's really not healthy..."

"In a few seconds, you are going to be not healthy, after I use a nifty little spell on you that I learned last summer. It gives you a most TERRIBLE case of the runs."

Her laughter this time was forced.

"You wouldn't dare," she said in a low voice.

"Oh, I wouldn't?"

"No, for then I would be forced to inform that old hag McGonagall of your actions and you would end up with yet another pleasant week of detention."

"Oh, you really think she'd believe your word over mine?" I smirked, muttering the incantation under my breath and watching with no small glee as she began shifting with discomfort.

"Er, Ron," she began in a strained voice. "I'm afraid I'll have to bid you goodnight now. I'm not feeling too well."

"Hermione, what did you do?" Ron groaned, watching her scamper up the steps as fast as her long legs could carry her.

"Nothing. Nothing at all," I fibbed. "It must've been those red beets...I'm not feeling so hot myself..." I made my exit.

"You're always hot in my books," the object of my affections called after me.

"Is she EVER going to be done in the bathroom?" Parvati sighed, tapping her foot impatiently on the floor at 6:45 the next morning.

" 'Fraid not," I said airily. "Cass-Ass has a terrible case of the trots."

"And how would you know, seeing as you avoid any conversation with her?"

I leaned over and said very quietly, "I gave it to her."

"This is an OUTRAGE!" Cassandra shrieked at lunchtime, black hair flailing. "An absolute outrage!"

"No, what is an outrage is the fact that she was able to find a counter-spell and stop her horrible diarrhea two hours ago," I confided to Ginny, who nodded her head in agreement.

"I will not stand for this!" She rose to her feet to face Professor McGonagall.

"Then by all means, Miss Valet, please sit down," Professor McGonagall sighed with frustration. "As I have said at least ten times, you have a total of seventeen evenings of detention."

"But WHY!" The-b-with-an-itch-of-witch screeched.

"As I have also said at least a dozen times, you were caught with Mr. Malfoy in a broom closet on the seventh floor around 11:30 last night."

"Why would I, by my own will, jump into a broom closet with HIM?" Cassandra sniffed angrily.

"I do not even try to understand the way your mind works, Miss Valet." Professor McGonagall shook her head. "After the things you said last night..."

"What things DID I SAY?" She stared at my favorite teacher blankly.

Professor McGonagall shook her head.

"That is quite enough of your shenanigans, Miss Valet." she said sternly. "Unless you wish to be even further punished. Detention tonight at 8'o clock in my office. Do try to be on time. I grow quite irate when my students are late for detentions. And when I am irate, I generally..."

"I am NOT going to detention tonight." Cassandra stomped her prissy little foot firmly. "And that's final. I did NOTHING of the sort that I am being of accused of!"

"If she's being accused of being a b-with-an-itch, than she is certainly doing everything of the sort," Parfvati snickered.

"You did everything of the sort so it's no use denying it, Miss Valet," Professor McGonagall snapped. "I saw you with my own two eyes!"

"Professor..." the beautiful witch began, in the blink of an eye adopting her "sweet voice," "You may be wondering why I was not in class this morning."

"Yes, I was about to move on to that. Do continue."

"Well, you see, Hermione Granger used a spell on me last night that gave me a dreadful case of the runs. I simply couldn't leave the loo for more than a few seconds until around 11:00 this morning, when I finally located the counter-spell."

"Most creative." Ooh, FEISTY Professor McGonagall! "Miss Granger," she asked dryly. "Did you curse Miss Valet last night?"

"Certainly not, Professor!" I said, pretending to be aghast. "Why ever would I do that to a fellow house-mate?"

"I thought as much," McGonagall smiled.

"B-but Professor! She DID! You must.." A rather odd expression fell over Cassandra's porcelain face and she grinned wickedly. "You must check her wand!"

"Very well, then. Miss Granger, may I please see your wand?" Her tired brown eyes clearly said, "_humor me."_

"Of course!" I chirped, handing her Ginny's wand (we had switched quickly under the table a few seconds previously when I had a inkling of where the discussion was leading).

"_Prior Incantato,"_ the old Professor said lazily. Smoke in the shape of a headful of curly hair issued from Ginny's wand. "See? The last spell Miss Granger did was a simple beauty spell!"

"But that was this morning!" Cassandra cried. "She did this last night!" She sprang to her feet and exited the Great Hall angrily, the male population watching her swinging hips the whole way. "You will be hearing from my father about this!" She called back.

"Miss Granger?" Professor McGonagall said quietly as she passed by me on her way to the Head Table.

"Yes, Professor?"

"Next time, do make sure that you hide the book that has a counter-spell so she won't be able to find it for a long, long time."

"Certainly."

Cassandra was still fuming in Charms to the only one that would listen- Ron.

"It's ridiculous," she growled, unfortunately using a quick "_Impedimenta" _to slow down the extremely heavy book I had "accidentally" sent her way when my Levitating charm "went wrong." Even though we had already begun our curriculum for the year, Professor Flitwick thought it would be a good idea to take a break and first review all the charms we had learned in the past six years before learning NEWT-level ones.

"I agree." Ron nodded his head excitedly. "I mean, you won't be able to try out for Quidditch! That's bloody terrible!"

"I know!" She moaned, hitting Harry in the back with a "_Rictusempra"_ when Ron wasn't looking. "You said I stood fair chance of getting the open Chaser position!"

"A bloody good chance."

"Even though I haven't played Chaser in ages- as you know, I was Beauxbaton's star Seeker- I'm sure I could refine my skills in a matter of time..."

"This is sickening," I mumbled to Parvati, whose flawless face was currently arranged in a look of disgust.

"I'd say." She aggressively levitated a nearby cushion and dropped it on her head.

"Ouuch!" Came her enraged voice.

"That was pathetic," I informed my fellow seventh-year. "You chose an object that scarcely weighs anything. How was that supposed to hurt her?"

"Annoy, not hurt," the Indian beauty sighed. "Do you really want to see Ron pulling a Florence Nightingale as she lies on a hospital bed?"

"Er- not really." I was secretly impressed by the slightly-ditzy-at-time-witch's knowledge of mid-eighteenth century British history.

"Ronald, it HURTS..." Cassandra whined.

"I'll give her something to really complain about." I clenched my fists and resisted the strong urge to remove her breasts using a particularly nasty spell I had found in one of the ancient books in the Black library. I whispered my desire to my companion who found the idea very, very, VERY tempting.

"Sometimes you have to say, 'what the hell,'" I smirked.

"What happened to MY chest!" A blood-curdling scream ricocheted through the Charms classroom, drawing the attention of all of my classmates-and Professor Flitwick.

"It seems to have disappeared," Ron gasped most intelligently.

"Colette and Clarice do NOT just get up and walk away!" The now- boob-less witch hissed.

Parvati and I just stared at each other, and unison snorted, "She named them?"

"Well, with boobs that big I reckon they each are like another person," Lavender suggested.

"What am I going to DO?" Cassandra wailed. "I can't go around like THIS!"

"C'est la vie, cher !" I drawled. (_Translation : That's life, dearie!)_


	13. Of Realizations

**A/N: Wow! 53 reviews! I would like to thank the following reviewers who left a comment on Chapter 12: KittyWeasleyKW, FairyKisses, lacatamar, CassieLupin, Elemental Water Mistress, aurora-sakura, ranydyz07, doublelily, MIDNIGHT-PIXIE, Sing-my-heart-out, silktophat, Hayls221, Lumos2000, Tinkerbell Faerie 2, Huggles4All, Bloody Corsets, Darkmoonfang, Cassondra, aishteru, RandomSmirf13, Tria Marie Val, Aqb Dk, kitotterkat, GreenEyes, the-insufferable-know-it-all, laura truewood, eckles, hermione2, madammarauder, skysongscry, RainDateChick, NicciBubbles, xhorseriderx4, dancerrdw, Lara Potter, EponineWeasley, AngelicOne, Nina-del-rio, True Slytherin Witch, cheekymonekyrulz, suckr4romrance, xPussyWillowKittenx, HufflepuffQueen, quidditchgirl13, Ronsreallove, Endless Potential, Eowyn Organa, and last, but certainly not least, -x-Holly-Berry-x-!**

**I would like to dedicate this chapter to lacatamar, who was the 600th reviewer! You rock!**

**I now present to you Chapter 13! Read, review, and above all else, enjoy!**

* * *

"Professor Flitwick, DO SOMETHING!" Ron said quickly. 

"I'm afraid there is nothing I can do," Professor Flitwick shook his tiny head dismally. "A very advanced, complicated spell caused this to occur. It is beyond my skill to reverse. You must all understand the gravity of this situation. Someone in this classroom used a terrible, bordering on illegal spell on Miss Valet. And when I discover who it was, I'm afraid the culprit will be facing serious punishment(s)."

Ooops. I should've known the spell was bordering on Dark Magic, seeing as I had located it in a dusty old book in the Most Noble House of Black.

Professor Flitwick stared at each of us in turn. I put on the most innocent expression as possible.

"Miss Granger," he said finally.

Oh, dam...

"Will you please take Miss Valet to the Hospital Wing?" He quickly wrote something down on a spare piece of parchment and sealed it. "And give this to Madame Pomfrey."

Pheesh. I was off the hook. Flitwick would never, EVER suspect me as the perpetrator for a crime like this.

"There's no need for Hermione to miss any Charms class," Cassandra said sweetly. "I am perfectly capable of finding my way to the Hospital Wing myself."

Or, maybe not.

"No, Miss Valet, you are new to Hogwarts, and even though you possess a great amount of intelligence..." (I coughed at that!) ..."it is easy for even the smartest witches and wizards to get lost in this huge castle. Miss Granger, didn't you have a bit of trouble locating your classrooms for your first few days?"

"Certainly, Professor," I beamed, lying through my teeth. I'd read _Hogwarts, A History_ extensively before boarding the Hogwarts Express for the first time, and had spent many hours memorizing the general layout of the important classrooms (there was a detailed 10-page map at the end of the wonderful book!). So, alas, I had encountered little in the way of trouble. But Flitwick- and _Miss Valet_- certainly didn't need to know that.

"That's dreadful, what some awful witch or wizard did to you," I remarked casually as I tried to keep up with her VERY fast pace down the corridor.

"Please don't even pretend you care," Cassandra snapped, "because it's obvious that you don't."

"No, honestly, that wasn't very nice what someone did to you."

"Do I need to add 'hard of hearing' to your growing list of problems?"

"My growing list of problems? You for one should certainly NOT be talking. You have SO many issues that one could grow quite old, trying to name them all."

"At least _I_ am not a bossy, arrogant know-it-all," Cassandra cackled.

"At least _I _am not a conceited, superficial, b-with-an-itch-y little slag," I countered.

"At least _I_ do not insist on engaging in ridiculous catfights the way you girls do."

"Hello, Dr –er-Malfoy," I snapped, remembering at the last minute that Draco and I were supposed to still be sworn enemies for all intensive purposes.

"Hello, ladies."

"Is there a reason you are following us?" I snarled.

"Yes. I was afraid you two would kill each other, having to spend 10 minutes together."

"That's VERY touching," I snorted.

"Of course," he drawled. "You see, Granger, as much as I dislike you, it would be dreadful if you were to die. Life would be most boring without your know-it-all self around for me torture relentlessly."

"I'm flattered that you would miss me so much."

"And Cassandra and her damn sexy body- well, let's just say that 99.9 percent of the blokes of Hogwarts would have my head if anything happened to her that I could have stopped."

"You could've stopped Hermione from removing my chest."

Draco chortled. "Granger? Doing Dark Magic? You must be kidding! That prim and proper Mudblood? She couldn't cast a spell like that, even if she tried!" Alas, I could. And Draco knew that darn well. He was putting on a pretty good show, though. However, it was yet to be seen if Cassandra actually believed a word that came out of his mouth.

"It's obvious where your true allegiances lie," the black-haired bimbo smiled wickedly.

"Yes, it is. With my mates and my family."

"No, with this filthy piece of scum walking beside us."

The dead sexy Slytherin rolled his slate grey eyes. "You really reckon that I would ally myself with someone of HER likes?"

"Prove it," Cassandra whispered. "Prove that you really despise Hermione."

"Why do you care?" I suddenly growled.

"Oh, 'Mione, are we getting _jealous?"_ She adopted a "baby-voice." "Just because I fancy Draco and want to know for sure that he doesn't enjoy associating with ugly girls such as you?"

"No, "we" is not getting jealous," I smirked. '_And it's clear you don't fancy Draco,"_ I added silently. I had an inkling what she was truly up to...

"So you wouldn't mind terribly if I were to kiss Draco right now, in front of you?"

"Of course not," I said with a laugh. "I loathe Malfoy more than you would know."

Cassandra sauntered over to Draco and laid a manicured hand on his chest. I saw the smirk on his face as she began to purr.

"Er- I thought you didn't fancy me," he said, putting a fake look of bewilderment on his face as her lips came closer and closer to his.

She gave a tinkling laugh. "I didn't fancy you seducing me. I have to be the seductress, not the seductee."

That was certainly a lame excuse. Even I could figure out that she had something up her sleeve- after all, from what Draco told me, she'd blatantly refused his attempts and hinted that she knew exactly what he was doing.

"I thought this was what you wanted," she added throatily. "After all, you did yank "me" in a broom closet late last night and proceed to snog me senseless, didn't you?"

"This is exactly what I wanted," he said huskily, before slamming his lips into Cass Ass's perfectly ruby red ones. They kissed passionately for a bloody long time. Alas, then the best person imaginable in that particular situation gasped. I whirled around to see...Ron.

* * *

"You look disturbed- why?" I asked in a bored sort of tone as I watched the two wealthy teenagers continue to engage in a battle of the tongues. 

"N-n-no reason," Ron stammered, the tips of his ears turning a bright red. "It's just that I never expected THOSE two to hook up. I mean, Cassandra's SO nice and Malfoy is a twitchy little ferret!"

"Stranger things have happened." I wrapped my arm around his waist. "Oi, Cassandra!" I yelled. "Get your non-existent buttocks over here this instant! Unless you don't want Madame Pomfrey to help you re-grow your breasts!"

_Crack._ The sound of a harsh slap reverberated through the air.

"You sick basta..." Bimbo Barbie shrieked, pushing away from the Seeker-who-currently-had-a-red-mark-on-his-face-in-the-shape-of-a-hand with all her might. "Ronald! Oh, Ronald!" She ran sobbing into Ron's arms. "H-h-he tried to hit on me!" I glanced over to Draco, who sneered.

"What's the matter, Granger, got some dragon dung under your nose?" Ah, how I missed those insults. Unfortunately, Ron didn't even rise to my defense- seeing as he was currently occupied with soothing a frazzled Cassandra Valet.

"That's what the matter is," I whispered, cocking my head towards the redhead and Ice Princess.

"That was not the desired effect- believe me," he confided to me quietly. "I started kissing her in an effort to make her believe that I really do like her, and it's not just part of some "plan." I continued at it when Ron came into view, in the hopes that it'd make him supremely angry- at both of us. Seeing your worst sworn nemesis snogging the hell out of a hot transfer student usually works- especially if said transfer student doesn't put up any resistance."

"But she did."

"I was not planning on her seeing Ron until it was too late. You see, she was seducing me in the hopes that YOU would become very jealous and say or do something that she could use against you. However, once again she outsmarted me. When she caught sight of Ron, she pretended that I had thrown myself at her- when in reality, we both kissed by our own free will- for our own different reasons."

"I know I'm supposed to be clever and everything," I shook my head in a smidgen of frustration, "but, quite frankly, I'm not really understanding what's going on."

"Are you two talking CIVILLY?" An incredulous voice interrupted our conversation.

"Of course not, Ron," I sighed, tucking an errant strand of vivid red hair behind his ears. "I am just informing Malfoy as calmly as possible just what will happen to him the next time he messes with one of the Gryffindor girls."

"Good," he said with obvious relief. "I just thought for a second that- well the idea is SO crazy-hell, it scares me to even think of it-I thought that you-you and Malfoy-never mind, it could never happen- I thought-I thought.."

"You thought WHAT?" I asked impatiently.

"I thought you were actually FRIENDS with the smarmy git!" Ron said softly, looking terrified at the very thought.

I gave a nervous laugh. "Me, _friends_ with MALFOY? Surely you jest!"

"He doesn't jest," Draco said smoothly, slinging an arm over my shoulders. "Hermione and I- well, we're friends. Very good friends. Quite _intimate_ friends! In fact, we're more than friends!"

"Get off me, you slimy ferret!" I yelled, trying my best not to crack a grin.

"That's not the tune you were singing last night in my dormitory," Draco said slyly.

"You evil prat!" I growled. "I wouldn't sleep with you if you were the last wizard on Earth!"

Suddenly, the tip of Ron's wand was placed directly at Ron's neck. "You stop talking about MY girlfriend like she's a scarlet woman, or else I'll hex you so badly that you won't be able to even take a pi.."

"Ron!" I admonished his swearing, but secretly I felt all warm and fuzzy inside at his strong possessiveness of yours truly. The object of my affections put his muscular arm around my shoulders, pulled me flush against him, and looked at Draco intently, as if challenging him.

"No need to get your knickers in a twist, Weasley. I was joking."

"Ha ha. Very funny," the redhead said stiffly, still fingering his wand. "Come on Hermione- we're leaving."

"What about ME, Ronald?" Cassandra pouted. "Are you going to leave ME here with Malfoy, after he tried to SEDUCE ME?"

"Hermione and I will walk you to the Hospital Wing," Ron flashed her his infamous lopsided grin. The one that was reserved for ME. And only for ME. Always for me. Grrr...!

"Good," she smiled with relief.

"Er- you two go right on ahead,"I said weakly. "I'm not feeling so well myself." The truth was, I simply couldn't stomach watching another good half-hour of the Ice Princess's shameless flirting with Ronas her boobs were re-growing. "_Take a close look, Ronald. Aren't they getting bigger?"_

Knut for your thoughts," a voice broke through my thoughts as I watched the figures of Ron and Cassandra diminish in the distance.

"They're scarcely worth that," I frowned, not really in the mood to talk to Draco.

"You have to admit, my whole 'pretending that we're lovers' scheme worked bloody brilliantly."

"Yes, it did," I admitted grudgingly. "Now, if you'll excuse me, seeing as I have detention in two hours, I'd really fancy getting a good start on all my homework."

"You're not going to catch up with them and chaperone?"

"It would be a fruitless endeavor. Whether or not I'm there, Ron will still gaze at that slag adoringly."

"But you have to admit, it's obvious that he still loves you."

"Yes, it is." I stared off into the distance. "However, it is also obvious that his eyes are wandering a bit too much."

"Hey, you did say that I'm quite sexy." Draco winked roguishly. "Your eyes are certainly wandering as much as his."

That certainly stopped me dead in my tracks.

"They are NOT," I snapped, knowing in my heart that every word that exited the Death Eater's mouth was 100 percent true, unfortunately.

"Yes, they are," he said airily, patting me on the shoulder consolingly. "I reckon I ought to get my twitchy little ferret self out of here, before someone sees YOU associating with ME! Or, even worse, ME associating with YOU! Oh, the horrors!"

"You do have an evil reputation to uphold," I shrugged. "I don't take that offensively. See you around."

"Later," he nodded to me in acknowledgement. As he left, I sank down to the cold stone floor, hugging my knees to my non-ample chest, his earlier words echoing through my head._"Your eyes are certainly wandering as much as his."_ Was I really just as bad as my boyfriend? Or was I _worse?_

Hmmm. Whereas Ron was captivated by her sultry good looks and responded to her shameless flirting just with kindness and friendliness,I had met another bloke who I met at strange hours behind my boyfriend's back, had snogged in a broom closet, and fantasized about his lips! (Not saying that Ron never had any "dreams" about Cassandra-I'm certain he did!). Ooops! Although Cassandra was obviously a threat, I had to stop blaming Ron so much. He was just doing what came natural to him- being the fantastic, friendly bloke that he was. The fantastic, friendly, and unbelievingably DAFT bloke that he was. I had to watch my step and change my strategy. If Ron's reaction to me possibly being mates with Draco was any indication of things to come, if he ever, ever, EVER found out about my alliance with him and some of the things that we had done, it would be over. All over. I would lose my boyfriend for "seeing" Draco Malfoy behind his back, when in reality the reason I began fratenizing with Draco Malfoy in the first place was to save my relationship with him!

"Miss Granger?" Professor McGonagall inquired. "Are you all right?"

"I'm find. Just pondering the meaning of life." I managed to crack a rather pathetic grin- but a grin, nevertheless.

"Will you please accompany me to my office?" she asked.

"S-sure," I answered shakily. The horror must've shown on my face, because...

"Oh, I assure you that you're not in trouble. Unless..." The corners of her lips turned up. "...Unless you've done something that has warranted a punishment."

"_Want me to start making a list?"_ I thought wryly.

"Oh, no, Professor, I have been very well-behaved these past few days." I gave her a small wink. "_Besides giving Cassandra diarheaa, removing her breasts using a Dark spell, and associating with Draco Malfoy quite frequently, even letting him KISS ME one time. Well, it was for a cover-up, but STILL!"_

"Then, by all means, do not worry and follow me!" My favorite teacher beckoned for me to follow. Hmmm. What did McGonagall want with me?

* * *

**A/N: I know this chapter was probably boring compared to some of the other ones, but I've realized (through some reviewers' comments and on my own) that one ofthese chapters actually has to show hints of a plot, not just 2,000 wordsof witty insults thrown back and forth, etc. So, trust me when I say that the next chapters may be a bit more interesting- this one was just necessary!**

**Coming up next Saturday: Chapter 14!**


	14. Of Mentors and Quarrels

**Wow! Fifty-one reviews! I'd like to extend a huge thank-you to the following fabulous guys and gals who reviewed Chapter 13: MysteryALASKA, lacatamar, astraeos, goblin monkey, Sing-my-heart-out, aurora-sakura, waterfaerie15, Fionaflamingo, unknownspecies, CassieLupin, laura truewood, N.C. PysChick, Gene Kelly, EponineWeasley, Cassondra, Lara Potter, True Slytherin Witch, Hayls221, Ronsreallove, Aqb Dk, eckles, Loku, Tinkerbell Faerie 2, RubyPhoenixFire, FairyKisses, doublelily, aishteru, Elemental Water Mistress, Eise, rainydyz07, Kitty Weasley KW, Lumos2000, LadySimone123, the-insufferable-know-it-all, silktophat, PhoenixWings13, Tria Marie Val, Nina-del-rio, Huggles4All, dancerrdw, Endless Potential, xPussyWillowKittenx, skysongcry, NicciBubbles, AngelicOne, quidditchgirl13, suckr4romance, RandomSmirf13, and last, but certainly not least, hermione256. **

**I will dedicate the 15th chapter to the 700th reviewer. As usual, please read, review, and above all else, ENJOY!**

**Forewarning: There is actually plot in this chapter:gasps: LOL!**

* * *

"Take a seat, Miss Granger," Professor McGonagall said gently as we entered her prim and proper office. I sat hesitantly on a stiff-backed red and gold chair. "And please cease your unnecessary worrying! Do you not trust me when I say that you are not in trouble? After all, you have seemed to place your trust in one particularly shady Draco Malfoy!" 

I gasped. "You know about that?"

"Of course, Miss Granger. Since I am the Deputy Headmistress of this school, Professor Dumbledore keeps me well-informed concerning all the significant events that happen beneath our very noses."

I gulped. For some reason, that knowledge in the hands of Minerva McGonagall frightened me more than a smidgen for some odd reason. Probably because of all the professors, she was the one who seemed to understand me the best. And was able to see through any façade that I put up.

"Now, first of all, Miss Granger, you've been looking a bit stressed these first few days back at school. Is there anything you wish to talk about?"

I literally choked on the Fig Newton she had offered me a minute earlier. Professor McGonagall was my absolute favorite teacher and role model...but still! She was so much older and wiser than me, and slightly on the intimidating side. I honestly didn't know if I'd feel comfortable confiding things to her...especially the current _stuff_ that was bothering me.

Professor McGonagall chuckled. Yes, she CHUCKLED, at the expression on my face.

"I do understand if the prospect of that makes you uncomfortable right now. I would just like you to know that the offer is always open ANYTIME this year- day or night- if you ever need some one to talk to. I'm going to be blunt about this, Miss Granger. Most unfortunately, this year isn't going to be easy for anyone. Especially you."

"I know," I said softly, secretly flattered that a woman of her caliber would be interested in listening to the woes of a 17-year old teenage girl. "I will certainly keep that in mind."

"You may be wondering why I am saying this."

I blinked. The last time I checked, Severus Snape, not Minerva McGonagall, was the accomplished Legilemens at Hogwarts.

"Yes, I am," I admitted.

"You see, Miss Granger, while Ron, Harry, and Ginny are wonderful friends for you, a witch of your potential sometimes needs guidance from a person older than herself. A mentor, to be specific."

Now I choked on my very own saliva. Pathetic.

"You want to be MY mentor?"

"Why not?" Minerva McGonagall smiled broadly. "You are without a doubt one of the most clever witches to ever grace the halls of Hogwarts- and, may I add, my favorite student."

Scratch choking on saliva- I was somehow now choking on my very own breath, if that was even medically possible.

Between coughs I managed to convey somehow to the Transfiguration professor that she was indeed going slightly off her rocker.

"No, Miss Granger, I will assure you than I am NOT going crazy."

I simply had to get out the room. This woman could READ MY MIND!

"Well, thank you very much, but I do have to be going now," I said hastily, rising to my feet.

"Sit down, please," Professor McGonagall sighed. "By the way, your face very clearly shows your emotions, Miss Granger. It isn't too hard to hard to make a reasonable guess at what you are thinking."

"I'm THAT transparent?" I asked incredulously.

"No. We just share many similarities. Why, Miss Granger, when I was your age I had your exact personality. I was clever, witty, fairly introverted, prim, and proper. Because of that, I can easily hypothesize your reactions to most anything. Do you understand what I am saying?"

I nodded my head. It made perfect sense- and it was a smidgen on the disturbing side. Did that mean that there was no hope for me? If Professor McGonagall was the same type of girl in her teenage years that I was now, would I grow up to be EXACTLY LIKE HER- a stern witch who never let her hair down? (Ever. It was always in a tight little knot of the top of her head. ) But, then again, if what Draco and I had overhead in the seventh corridor the previous night was any indication, she DID occasionally let her "wild side" break through. So maybe it wouldn't be so dreadful of a fate, turning into Minerva McGonagall when I became an adult. After all, she had CHUCKLED-actually chuckled- in the few minutes since I had entered her office. It was certainly a start- and a quite promising one at that.

"To continue, I'd like to explain fully the role of a mentor. Although, I'm sure you could tell me yourself."

"A mentor gives her mentee advice, access, and advocacy," I recited word from word from some old dusty book or another. "In the Wizarding World, that translates to giving advice regarding anything in the young witch's life, especially the magical aspects, helping the teenage girl hone her magical talents, and giving her opportunities that would never otherwise be available."

"Precisely. Which is exactly why I have chosen you, Miss Granger. You have an immeasurable amount of talent and potential, and will be able to very soon be of a huge asset to the Order. And also, I think we will be able to get along wonderfully and develop a strong friendship. That is of great importance in this particular type of mentoring relationship. So, do you agree to my proposition?"

By this time, I was beginning to feel slightly light-headed. The person I admired most in absolutely the WHOLE world was offering to mentor me- guide me in my journey of magical learning, teach me new things, like...The pieces all came together as I realized just exactly what we were going to concentrate on first, as my last sentence echoed loudly in my head, "_giving her opportunities that would never otherwise be available."_

"Professor," I said, unable to keep the excitement out of my voice, "You're going to teach me to become an Animagus!"

"I knew there was a reason I chose you," she beamed with pride as my exhilaration mounted.

* * *

"Bloody hell!" Ron swore as we were scrubbing the dungeons- by hand, I may add- that night during detention. "She's going to teach you to be an Animagus? That's brilliant! But aren't you a little young?" 

"If the Marauders can do, I can do it," I shrugged, a bit insulted by his lack of confidence in me. "And Professor McGonagall contacted the Ministry and they made an age exception on my part."

"So, what animal are you going to be?" He flashed me a lopsided grin and flicked some suds off his sponge that landed directly on my nose.

"I haven't quite decided yet," I mused, sticking out my tongue playfully.

"You know, you really should talk to Cassandra," Ron said thoughtfully. "She says that in Beauxbatons they spent 3 months studying Animagi! I'm sure she'd love to help you choose."

"That's quite alright," I said frostily, any good mood vanishing at the mention of Cass Ass's name. "I reckon Professor McGonagall knows just a smidgen more about that topic than she does." If Ron noticed the heavy sarcasm in my voice, he didn't comment on it.

"Wait until everyone hears about this!" My boyfriend said ecstatically. "They'll all be SO impressed!"

"Er, Ron? One slight problem. I have to keep this a secret."

His handsome face fell visibly. There went his chance to flaunt his clever girlfriend. "But WHY?" he pouted.

"Because there's a good possibility that I will use my new ability to the benefit of the Order- that's why," I smiled triumphantly. "Isn't that exciting?"

"It's too dangerous," Ron said abruptly, throwing his sponge back into the bucket of soapy water. "I'm not letting you do anything like that. No WAY!"

I felt my temper begin to rise. I had expected Ron to be bursting of pride and support at my thrilling news, but instead- this?

"You can't stop me," I snapped. "The last time I checked, I am over 10 months older than you, and may I add, wiser?" The instant I said wiser, I knew I'd made a terrible mistake. It was time for another infamous Ron and Hermione row. An insult to Ron's intelligence was guaranteed to spark off a quarrel of enormous proportions.

His blue eyes darkened dramatically- no, unfortunately not with lust, but anger.

"Are you insinuating something?" he growled. And when I mean growled, I mean literally GROWLED.

"Er-no! Certainly not," I said quite lamely.

He glared at me suspiciously.

"You think you're cleverer than me," the object of my affections said furiously.

"I DO NOT," I said even more weakly, when in reality I did. Even Ron knew the truth- that when brains were handed out, he didn't get a ginormous amount. However, he did have an decent head on his shoulders- don't get me wrong-it was just that he never used it. Laziness and procrastination were allowed to take over, most unfortunately.

"Yes, you do," he sneered. "It's written all over your face."

I inwardly groaned. "Ron, why don't we.."

"You know, Hermione, not every intelligent witch insists on being a total know-it-all the way you do," he said snidely. "You act as though you're superior to the rest of us mere mortals. I'm surprised that you haven't started hanging out with Malfoy. You two would make a perfect match. Snobby know-it-all and snobby-know-it-all."

"Ron, stop it!" I said shrilly, by this time close to tears. "Why are you saying this?"

Ron, like most men, completely ignored me.

"It is possible to still be a normal, fun-loving, teenage girl, even if you do happen to be a genius. Take Cassandra, for example. She doesn't feel the need to harp on her mates about getting their assignments done, or remind them constantly how much better she is than them by waving her completed, 5 and a half foot essay right in front of their eyes. Or raise her hand and practically wet her knickers with excitement at knowing an answer.."

"Do NOT mention THAT b-with-an-itch-of-a-witch's name in front of me," I hissed.

"Why don't you like her?" Ron snapped, his face steadily growing redder and redder. "Is it because an attractive person of the opposite sex is actually paying attention to me? Is that it? Because besides Harry, NO guy even spares you a second glance. NO one. You're just jealous. It's as simple as that."

That did it. It a dangerously low whisper, and shaking so hard with rage that I could barely stand up on my own two legs, I said, "I don't know what the bloody hell your damn issue is, Ronald, but perhaps, since you obviously don't think so highly of me, maybe I will just go and associate with Malfoy, as you suggested."

And without a glance back, I stalked out of the Potions classroom, almost running in Snape who was gaping at the two us with an expression bordering on awed, for once the corners of his mouth not turning up in a smirk at the sight of me.

"Really, Miss Granger, I do not know where you're going," he drawled, "seeing as you have another 2 ½ hours of detention to finish."

"Frankly, I don't give a damn," I yelled. Which, of course, earned me yet another week in detention- and worst of all, at the same exact time that Cassandra had it. Whee. What fun.

* * *

"Hermione, a strong witch doesn't cry over some git of bloke," Parvati said gently, rubbing my back as I sobbed into my pillow. 

"Then I'll admit it. I'm a weak witch. A pathetically weak witch, to be precise. A pathetically weak know-it-all witch, actually," I managed to gasp out between sobs. Out of the corner of my right eye I saw the two best friends exchange glances. "Well, tell me the truth. Am I a snobby know-it-all?"

"Er- Hermione, of course not!" Parvati said brightly. "You're the most clever witch of this age, but you don't act like it!"

I growled. "Are you implying that I act daft and dumb like that Ronald Weasley?"

"No, no, no! Of course not! What I mean is, you don't going around PURPOSELY flaunting your intelligence. It just sorta happens..." the beautiful witch trailed off.

"That's a comforting thought."

"What she means, Hermione, is that while you don't go around bragging about your insanely high marks, people still become very jealous. Such as your dear boyfriend." Lavender piped in.

"Ron? Jealous of me?What reason does he have to be jealous of MOI? He,who is bloody brilliant at Quidditch andWizard's chess, unflinchingly loyal, courageous, hilarious, attractive, willing to lay his life down for others, popular..." I trailed off. "I, on the other hand, am a insufferable-know-it-all who always has her nose in some boring ol' book or another, and doesn't know how to have fun. Hmm... that makes PERFECT sense."

"Oh, you just don't get it, Hermione." Parvati threw her arms up in despair. "You know how low Ron's self esteem is. He constantly feels inferior when compared to his two best mates in the world. Harry, the Boy-Who-Lived is the most famous 17-year old in the world, super-popular, rich, and the best Seeker Gryffindor has seen in AGES. You are perhaps the smartest person in this school right now- except for Professor Dumbledore. Your marks are out of this world, and you know ABSOLUTELY everything. Don't take this the wrong way, Hermione, but I don't think I could stand being one of your-or Harry's- close mates. I'd simply feel second-rate all the time."

I did take her last remark the wrong way, and it certainly stung. However, I tried not to let it show. After all, it was a compliment of sorts, in a strange way.

"You see, Ron always feels like he's living in the shadow of you and Harry," Lavender picked up where her fellow queen gossiper left off. "That's why he became SO defensive when you accidentally let it slip that you are "wiser" than him. Our favorite redhead took that very hard, because he felt as though even you-his girlfriend- agreed with the his idea of the popular belief that you are better than him. You can see why he would very quickly become irritated."

My mind was whirling, but what my two dorm mates said seemed to make perfect sense. It was certainly something I'd had an inkling of over the years, but never until now had I really examined it from every angle.

"So, I made a mistake," I sighed. "The blame's all on me."

"No, your boyfriend didn't handle the situation in the best way possible. However-no pun intended- you can't _blame_ him for reacting the way he did."

"I am beginning to develop the most dreadful headache," I groaned. "I need something wickedly strong- and fast!"

Parvati and Lavender watched me, shock written across their faces, as I rummaged throught my trunk.

"You don't mean that..."

"I would never believe..."

"Are you finally loosening up?"

"Don't worry, we won't tell anyone...it might ruin your reputation..."

"Are you looking for a bottle of ODGEN'S FIREWHISKEY?" Camethe unison gasp.

* * *

**A/N: Pathetic little cliffhanger, I know. And boring chapter in general. But things will start to get exciting soon. I promise. This was just another necessary chapter of sorts.**

**Coming up sometime next weekend-ish...Chapter 15!**


	15. Of Grape Juice

**Wow! 44 reviews...down a little bit from normal, but who am I to complain when 42 awesome readers left a comment on Chapter 14? I'd like to thank the following fab people:Lost in Land, MIDNIGHT-PIXIE, DeadSexyDraco, lacatamar, Angel-4rom-heaven, ShadowHexx771, skysongscry, Sing-my-heart-out, goblin monkey, Nina-del-rio, the-insufferable-know-it-all, kitotterkat, N.C. PysChick, Kitty Weasley KW, Elemental Water Mistress, Darkmoonfang, quidditchgirl13, unknownspecies, Hayls221, Lumos2000, FairyKisses, Ron Lover 2005, cassondrs, RandomSmirf13, True Slytherin Witch, raindyz07, Rachel, rgluvr13, SafetyXPins, hermione256, ageek, Eowyn Organa, Tinkerbell Faerie 2, EponineWeasley, Huggles4All, aishteru, doublelily, xPussyWillowKittenx, Gene Kelly, suckr4romance, AngelicOne, Ronsreallove, and last, but certainly not least, dancerrdw. **

**I've been thinking. My next update will be the Saturday before high school starts. Since I plan on writing at LEAST 5 more chapters (hopefullly) in this fic, I will have to juggle this story with all my schoolwork (I'm takingquite a heavy courseload for asophomore)and extracurricular activities. I WILL try my very best to update every Saturday, but I can't guarentee you 100 percent that every Saturday you'll see a new chapter up. There is a VERY good chance of that, however, because I'll work my butt off in any spare time I have. Just thought I'd let you guys know. By the way, after this story is completed, I am considering starting another fanfiction...how would that sound? I'm not exactly sure what the pairing will bejust quite yet, because I have SO many plot bunnies hopping around in my head, but it is something I am thinking about.**

**Since the reviews fell a smidgen short of 700, I've chosen to dedicate this chapter to all of my loyal, kind, and wonderful reviewers. You guys absolutely ROCK, and I love you all to pieces. This chapter is for YOU...read, review, and above all else...ENJOY :-)**

* * *

_"Are you looking for a bottle of OGDEN'S FIRE WHISKEY?" Came the unison gasp._

Despite the fact that Ron and I had just had a rather nasty quarrel, in which I had been sobbing over for the past fifteen minutes, I –honest-to-Merlin-truth- almost lost it at Parvati and Lavender's question. And I do not mean "losing it" as in having a nervous breakdown or something of the sort- I am referring to succumbing to the sudden urge to laugh the you-know-what out of myself. And when I mean laugh, I am referring to the gut-wrenching fit of chuckles that one experiences every once in a while that completely takes over their body, heart, mind and soul and they practically cry with mirth. The situation was THAT amusing.

"Oh, ye of little faith in Hermione Granger," I sighed, as I waved my bottle of Welsch's grape juice in front of their shocked eyes.

"G-grape juice?" Lavender eeped.

"Yes. It's bloody good stuff- very sweet and concentrated. I would offer you some, but this is all I have and it has to last me for while, seeing as since it is a Muggle fruit juice-100 percent juice, may I add, and none of the stores in Hogsmeade carry it." I said brightly as I poured myself a glass and moaned in happiness as the delicious liquid slid down my throat. "Mmm...it's SO good!"

Parvati and Lavender looked, to put it mildly, disappointed.

"Ah, you two finally thought that your attempts for the past six years have worked and I am now rebelling against the high standards which I set when I first stepped into Hogwarts?" The two nodded their non-bushy heads of hair almost ashamedly. I smirked. "Well, you were wrong. I may swear every once in a while, or have the occasional naughty thought, but I do not- I repeat, I DO NOT drink Fire whiskey. Or any other alcoholic beverage, for that matter. Except for a sip or two of champagne on New Year's. Do I make myself clear?" They both nodded, strangely mute. Until the corner of Parvati's mouth began to twitch. That did it. Within seconds, the three of us were absolutely HOWLING with laughter and a few unlady-like snorts.

"Grape juice!" Parv screamed, before dissolving into another giggling fit. Obviously forgetting that it was close to midnight and our dormitory certainly WAS NOT soundproof. I chimed in with a very loud, "And you thought it was FIREWHISKEY," accenting the last word, of course. Meanwhile, in the Boy's Dormitory...

* * *

"Am I hearing what I think I'm hearing?" Seamus asked sleepily, sitting up in bed. 

"Dunno what you're hearing. It would be kind if you would enlighten us, mate," Harry said grumpily, aggravated at his very steam dream involving him, a certain redhead (not Ron, you perverts!), and a refrigerator (Harry can be VERY creative at times!) being interrupted.

"I distinctly heard the word 'grape juice' and then 'Firewhiskey.' I think it's coming from a Girl's Dormitory!" Seamus almost urinated his boxers with excitement. "Well, what are we waiting for?" he wiggled his eyebrows, rolling out of bed. "To the Girl's Dormitory!"

"Count me in," Dean said mischievously, now fully awake. "Harry?"

"Go away!" the Boy-Who-Lived snapped, trying to bury himself deeper in his four-poster bed.

"The voices might've been coming from the Sixth Year's dormitory," Seamus hinted meaningfully.

Moaning and groaning, Harry rubbed his emerald eyes and slipped on his glasses. The prospect of seeing Ginny, in the flesh, in that short, skimpy nightgown of hers outweighed continuing his erotic dream with his girlfriend doing certain things to him-and with him- that she'd never dream of doing until their wedding night. Grabbing his prized Firebolt, Harry joined the two boys in their mission.

"What about Ron?" Dean inclined his head towards the second youngest Weasley's bed with the drawn curtains.

Harry sighed. By the fact that Ron had came storming into the dormitory after detention, slamming the door SO hard that the whole room literally shook, he had determined that his best mate had had yet another tiff with Hermione. Harry wasn't too keen on experiencing the towering temper of Ronald Weasley at 12:03 at night, but he figured that the redhead needed something to keep his mind off of his relationship problems. This would be the perfect thing- at least he hoped.

"Ron?" He gently shook his best friend's broad shoulder.

"Umm, Hermione, that feels GOOD," Ron moaned, as Harry had to bite his cheeks to keep from guffawing.

"Mate, it's me, Harry. Not your lovely girlfriend."

Harry was a bit taken aback when he found himself being pulled down towards the bed as a result of unusual arm strength displayed by his best mate.

"Mmm, _Hermione,_ you're awfully heavy. But it feels BLOODY BRILLIANT! Touch me there...heck, that would feel good..." Ron smiled as Harry, with obvious disgust, scrambled to get off the second-youngest Weasley's body. (Now, if it was the youngest Weasley beneath him that would be a completely different story. However, we are digressing from the original topic, so to continue...) Harry sighed as he realized just what he had to do.

"Darnit, Harry, what was THAT for?" Ron said sourly, rubbing the bright red mark on the side of his face that the Boy-Who-Lived's hand had caused.

"Sorry, mate." Harry shrugged. "I was left with no choice. You were fantasizing about Hermione, and when I tried to wake you up, you seemed to think that I was her and, er, well..."

"Oh, bugger!" Ron attempted to hide his red face, but with no avail. Dean and Seamus were finding the situation most amusing, as they sniggered and snorted quite loudly from the other side of the dormitory. "Apologies, mate. I honestly must've thought that you were Hermione..."

"I would question your sexuality," Harry grinned, "If it were not for the fact that I have heard you moaning Hermione's name so many other times in your sleep, along with some choice phrases that I will not repeat in fear of corrupting innocent minds. Not to mention all the lovely snogging sessions you participate in with Herms herself. Trust me, Ron, we all know that you are straight. Even if you DID drag me on top of you."

Seamus and Dean – the first in particular- were both highly affronted by Harry's use of the phrase, "corrupting innocent minds."

"Are you insinuating that _I _have an innocent mind?" Seamus asked crossly. "Because I will assure you that I DO NOT, and I certainly DO NOT want you going around and spreading untrue rumors about me. It'd simply RUIN my reputation FOR GOOD!"

"Lemme guess, you are currently dating quite the intelligent witch," Harry said pensively.

"Padma Patil." Seamus puffed his muscular chest out in pride. "Just asked her out last night. How did you know?"

"Because you used the words, 'insinuating,' 'assure,' 'certainly,' and 'simply' all in one breath, that's why, mate." Harry gave him a manly clap on the shoulder. "Congrats. Perhaps she'll be a good influence on you."

Seamus face quickly filled with horror while he contemplated his dorm mate's last sentence.

"I surely HOPE NOT!" He shuddered at the very thought. "That's my absolute WORST FEAR! I have nightmares about such dreadful things..."

"There he goes again," Dean whispered in an undertone to Harry and Ron. "Using 'surely,' 'absolute,' and 'dreadful' in a span on 14.5 seconds!"

"We feel for you, mate," Harry patted the Irish lad's shoulder sympathetically as the four boys filed out the door and embarked on their incredibly long, exhausting journey, all of 45 seconds of it.

* * *

"It's coming from the...Seventh Year's dormitory," Seamus said bewilderedly. "From Hermione, Lavender, Parvati, and _Cassandra."_

"Ah, I knew that sexy witch would be a good influence on them." Dean rubbed his hands together in glee.

"Er, I reckon I'll be going back to bed now," Ron stuttered, no doubt not looking forward to seeing his girlfriend.

"You're going NOWHERE, mate." Harry stepped in front of him to block his way. "Actually, you're going to be the one to fly up to the dormitory."

"Uh-uh," Ron stammered. Then, sounding SO much like his stubborn sister, he said, "I refuse to."

"I believe you have NO choice in the matter," Harry smirked, as he and Ron's other two doormats physically lifted the lean redhead up and onto Harry's waiting Firebolt.

"Okay, Ron. When you get to the top of the staircase, there's a tiny button on the wall to the right of you, around an inch up from the floor. Press this button and the rest of us will be able to walk up the staircase without it turning into a slide." Harry continued.

"I would rather NOT know how you know this," Ron muttered as he kicked off the ground. "Seeing as it was probably my dear, not-so-innocent baby sister who told you."

Harry fortunately chose not to validate that insinuation, which was a rather smart move on his part. He was positive Ron wouldn't take so kindly to that particular bit of news...

* * *

"Ladies, we need to quite down," I said hastily, sobering up. "I think I hear footsteps." 

"Oh, it's probably just Cassandra, coming back from a shag with one of Hogwart's eligible bachelors," Parvati scowled. "Perhaps we should put up a sign on the door saying, "Bitc--- not welcome."

"An excellent idea," I agreed, nodding my head, "if the door wasn't opening right this moment." However, our jaws simply dropped in shock when we saw just who was standing outside of our dormitory.

"So, you really think you can get away with this," Seamus smirked, plopping on my bed like he had every right in the world to. His three other dorm mates joined him- also on MY very own PERSONAL BED!

"Get away with WHAT?" I snapped, although a bit on the weak side, for I had just noticed that not ONE of them had a shirt on. I concluded that it must have been some strange Gryffindor male tradition that every bloke in the house just HAD to have rip-roaring abs which he was deeply obsessed with. (I'd only overheard Ron and Harry discussing their chests around a hundred times.) (Or perhaps it was a strange male tradition in general). Obviously, I'd seen Harry and Ron without their shirts on before (not in that context, those of you with oh-so-dirty minds!), but Seamus and Dean having such muscular upper torsos was a bit of a shock to me. However, they didn't have anything on my two best mates- especially Harry. Oh, if only one certain Ginevra Weasley could be here right now...even just LOOKING at the chiseled, sculpted, etc, etc. chest of my _almost-brother _made color rise in my cheeks.

"Having a party including alcohol and NOT inviting us!" Seamus said triumphantly.

"Where's Cassandra?" Ron broke in randomly, lifting up my bedspread as if she was HIDING under my bed, and drawing my attention to HIS presence in MY dormitory. Now, I had obviously KNOWN he had followed the other seventh-year boys in here to investigate, but I was trying my darnest to ignore him. Therefore, I gave him the iciest glare I could muster at 12:15 AM and sniffed.

"Why do YOU care?"

"She's off shagging Malfoy or some other unlucky bloke," Lavender said sweetly, eying Seamus's chest appreciatively. Oh, boy. Wait until she heard that her on-and-off boyfriend was now dating the twin of her best mate... (I'd overheard Padma talking to Hannah Abott in the loo).

The four boys all coughed simultaneously.

"UNLUCKY BLOKE?" Dean and Seamus chorused in unison. Ron, thank Merlin, did not vocalize his disagreement to Lav's words, but I could tell by his expression that if I was not in the room, he would've certainly spoken up.

"Yes, UNLUCKY BLOKE!" Lavender said shrilly, glaring at Seamus. "Have you ever actually taken your eyes off Cassandra's body for a second and actually considered her PERSONALITY?" This was pretty big, coming from the girl who dated blokes SOLELY for their looks and wealth. Need I name some of the wizards she has dated just because they were drop-dead gorgeous? It would take many hours...

"Of course we both have," Dean said quite defensively. "After all, we are NOT shallow blokes."

"Mmm Hmmm." Parvati narrowed her eyes in obvious suspicion.

"It's just that- well, to be blunt about it, Cassandra is 'fresh blood,'" Seamus grinned. That was certainly NOT a very smart comment to make in front of Parvati Patil.

"Are you insinuating that my sister ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU, COMPARED TO THAT BIMBO?" She snarled. That's one thing I have to say about Parvati- she's very loyal to her sister and close mates.

"You're dating PADMA?" Lavender stared at the object-of-her-affections incredulously, before whirling around and facing Parv. "And you- my best friend in the whole world..just when were YOU going to tell me this? Or were you planning on letting me hear about it through the grapevine? I thoughtI was one of the "Gossip Queens" of Hogwarts...I'm the one who issupposed to START the gossip! Not hear about it three days later!"

"It isn't gossip, Lav, it's the truth! And he just asked her out last night!"

"Parvati, you know that I..." she trailed off, after glancing at Seamus, deciding it wouldn't be a brilliant idea to bring up the fact that she STILL liked him, even after their terrible breakup in the sixth year. "Come on, Seamus. We NEED to talk," she said firmly. "You too, Parv."

"I'm going along with those three, to make sure you won't stumble upon any corpses outside the door tomorrow morning." Dean winked.

"But the FIREWHISKEY," Seamus moaned. "You girls have FIREWHISKEY."

"I will assure you that we DO NOT have Firewhiskey of any form in this dormitory," I sighed. "I do apologize for bursting your bubble. You must have misunderstood." I ushered the protesting Irish wizard out the door.

"But my ears weren't CHEATING me!" He wailed. "You were at least TALKING about alcohol."

"Maybe we were, maybe we weren't," I said cryptically. "Now GO!"

"Er, goodnight, Ron, Hermione," Harry said hastily, obviously not fancying being caught in another one of our rows.

"Ron," I said quietly, "You should go. Imagine how bad it would look if you were caught in here."

My boyfriend just kept on staring at me with his handsome features arranged in a rather odd expression. Something between a cross of hurt and guilt..and _LUST?_

"Hey, just so you know, I really didn't go hang out with Malfoy after I stormed out of the Dungeons," I said airily, trying to lighten the mood. "You know I don't fancy heartless Slytherin prats. And- well, I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings during our row. I honestly didn't mean to and-" I thought back to the discussions my roommates and I had-" I truly don't think that I am any wiser than you. Although I am 7 months older. I didn't realize how sensitive you are to things like that. Honestly, Ron, I NEVER think that I am superior to you- or that Harry is to you."

Ron just kept on those darn sexy cobalt blue eyes fixed on me. I felt my face grow hot during his leisurely perusal. Within 5 seconds I found myself pressed up against the nearby wall, his mouth a mere 3 inches away from mine. Ah...this was more like it. Within 7 seconds I found myself being hungrily kissed by an incredibly sexy redhead. Within 15 seconds, I found myself losing every scrap of common sense as my legs began to shake with the intensity of his passionate, hot snogs. Within 30 seconds...well, there's no need to go there.

* * *

"Damn you, Ronald," I sighed10 minutes later, "being able to have such power over me with those yummy lips of yours." 

"There's more where that came from," he said huskily.

I blocked my mouth with one slender hand. "Not so fast, mister. First of all, YOU are going to apologize to me for saying such cruel things during our row."

"I'm sorry," he said gruffly.

I cupped a hand around one ear.

"What did you say, Ron? I don't think I could hear you."

"I said, I'm SORRY!" He practically yelled, and then broke into a huge, lopsided grin. "There. Happy?"

"Again, damn you for being able to dissolve all my anger towards you- and trust me, there was plenty- with your talented mouth," I grumbled. It just WASN'T FAIR! I had cried over his hurtful words for the past 3 hours and here I was, completely having forgiven him, just because he was a BLOODY good kisser who could set my every nerve on fire. Scratch that- he could set my every nerve, muscle, bone, organ, blood cell, etc. on fire. Was I pathetic, or what?

"Your lips can certainly be considered a weapon," I sighed.

"I'd say." Cassandra strode into the dormitory, clad in a scandalizing short jean skirt and a red spaghetti strap top, both of which were quite wrinkled.

"And just where were you,Cassandra?" I sneered.

"That would be NONE of your business, Hermione," she smirked."And I would have to agree with you- Ron's lips can be a deadly weapon at times...but delightfully deadly!"

My mouth opened and closed wordlessly as I felt fury as I had never experienced before rise up in my petite body. WHAT THE BLOODY HELL WAS SHE TALKING ABOUT?

**

* * *

A/N:I hope ya'll enjoyed this.. **

Coming up next week...Chapter 16!


	16. Of Delightfully Deadly Weapons

**Fizzing Whizbees! 53 reviews! I'd like to thank the follow people for leaving such uplifting comments on Chapter 15: rainydyz07, Lumos2000, Huggles4All, quidditchgurl07, Maria A, waterfaerie15, FairyKisses, ThePhamtomIt14, Liz 3, Loku, Azu Luna, Ayantara, unknownspecies, GreenEyes, lacatamar, AshEllie, SafetyXPins, Elemental Water Mistress, WhiteRoseDancer, gobin monkey, dancerrdw, xmisscutiepiex, Ron Lover 2005, Angelic One, NicciBubbles, Sing-my-heart-out, TrueBluePotterFan, random person you don't know, suckr4romance, chanel09 , the-insufferable-know-it-all, endowed with insanity, MIDNIGHT-PIXIE, Endless Potential, RubyPhoenixFire, ShadowHexx771, IluvLost9393, doublelily, True Slytherin Witch, Gene Kelly, Tria Marie Val, aishteru, kitotterkat, RandomSmirf13, Nina-del-rio, rgluvr13, xPussyWillowKittenx, hermione256, quidditchgirl13, Eowyn Organa, skysongscry, Ronsreallove, and last, but certainly not least, MysteryALASKA. **

**I'd like to dedicate this chapter to Sing-my-heart-out, who I chat with online- she recently gave me some fab ideas for this chapter! You rock, gurl!**

**I'm _hoping_ that I'll be posting Chapter 17 on Saturday. Luckily, I'm ahead of schedule with this chapter, so I should be able to get a good start on the next one before (da da dum) school (eek!) starts and have little problems meeting the deadline. That said, please read, review, and above all else, ENJOY!**

* * *

_"Your lips can certainly be considered a weapon," I sighed._

_"I'd say." Cassandra strode into the dormitory, clad in a scandalizing short jean skirt and a red spaghetti strap top, both of which were quite wrinkled._

_"And just where were you, Cassandra?" I sneered._

_"That would be NONE of your business, Hermione," she smirked." And I would have to agree with you- Ron's lips can be a deadly weapon at times...but delightfully deadly!"_

_My mouth opened and closed wordlessly as I felt fury as I had never experienced before rise up in my petite body. WHAT IN MERLIN WAS SHE TALKING ABOUT?_

* * *

Cassandra smiled sweetly at my absolutely furious and shocked expression. 

"If I were you, Hermione, I'd go and break up the fight between your two lovely roommates and Dean and Seamus before there are any casualties."

"I am NOT moving from this spot," I hissed, "Until you tell me just what you meant by that little remark of yours."

"Oh, when I said that Ronald's lips are a delightfully deadly weapon?" She asked offhandedly, and then gave a light little titter. "Oh, _please_, Hermione. Don't tell me that you actually thought that your boyfriend and I actually kissed! I would never DREAM of coming between you two- it is obvious that you are SO in love with each other! It's quite sweet, actually!"

"You LIE!" I snarled. "Ever since you've come to Hogwarts, all you've been trying to do is break Ron and I up!"

Ron stared at me as though I was utterly crazy and deranged.

"Hermione, what is your problem? Give her a chance to explain herself!"

"What is MY PROBLEM? How would you feel if some other bloke was here with us, saying over and over again how my lips are a delightfully deadly weapon? Oh, I'm sure you would feel all warm and fuzzy inside, wouldn't you?"

"Hermione." Cassandra put a cold hand on my shoulder in a gesture of consolation. Consolation my arse. I shivered at her touch. This girl was EVIL beyond belief- absolutely PURE EVIL.

"Get your hand off of me RIGHT THIS INSTANT!" I growled.

"How I know that Ron's lips can wreak havoc on any girl's senses," she began ever so sweetly, "is by just watching him."

"Well, aren't you _extremely_ talented," I said quite sarcastically, flashing her an obviously-fake smile. "I stand here in utter awe of your innumerable gifts, to be honest. Were you born like that?"

"Please, Hermione, be reasonable," Ron sighed.

"When I watch him," Cassandra continued, completely ignoring our little exchange, "I see that he is a passionate, fiery bloke, and thus I conclude that he kisses in much of the same manner- very rough and passionate, pouring his whole soul into each meeting of the lips."

I absolutely, absolutely, ABSOLUTELY hated myself for this, but I agreed 100 percent with the sleazy bimbo.

"Perhaps you're right," I said airily, laying my head on Ron's shoulder. "But that doesn't mean I appreciate YOU discussing what MY boyfriend's lips can do."

"Blimey, Hermione, don't get your knickers in a twist," Ron muttered.

Ha. By the looks of the reddened tips of his (I'm sorry to say) rather large ears, he was quite enjoying having a sultry witch compliment him on his lips and certainly found it flattering.

"I'm NOT getting my knickers in a twist," I said hotly. Suddenly I found a headful of silky black hair in my face as Cassandra forcefully ushered me to the door.

"You must go out there RIGHT this instance and break up that quarrel," she insisted, as though she actually CARED what happened to her fellow Gryffindors.

"Why can't YOU do it?" I whined, attempting to hold my ground, but unfortunately, Cassandra possessed a LOT more strength in those delicate arms of hers than I would ever had imagined. Within 5 seconds, I found myself watching Lavender yell at Seamus until her face turned purple while Dean and Parvati were both pretending not to know the two or acknowledge the other's existence.

"Those two have been going at it for AGES," Parvati yawned. "And I don't know either of their names, or else I would certainly scream both of them in a highly colorful sentence that would make my grandmother roll over in her grave."

"Did I hear someone say something? Or was that just the wind?" Dean said snidely, watching as Lavender started yanking on Seamus's short hair.

I looked at Parvati. "I know why those two are fighting, but your problem is..."

My roommate sniffed.

"He..." she pointed a finger accusingly at Dean, "insinuated that I am a disloyal person when I chose NOT to pick sides in the argument."

"For Merlin's sake, Parv, Padma's your sister! Don't you want to protect her boyfriend from the likes of _HER?"_

"The name that you just spoke with great distaste also happens to be my best friend," the Indian beauty said crossly, "So I'd appreciate if you would keep your opinion to yourself."

"So much for sisterly love," Dean sniggered. "And I thought you were better than that, Parv. You really think that it's justified for Lavender to inflict bodily harm on Seamus just because she's jealous that he's going out with your twin sister? It may have slipped her mind that it was SHE who initiated that huge break-up last year..."

"Kiss him," I whispered into Parvati's ear. "Right now, hard on the lips. It's the only thing that will shut him up AND distract our two rowing mates."

"Are you SERIOUS?' She hissed back. "He would NEVER want that!"

"Look, Parvati, I'm experienced in these matters. Ron and I shared our very first kiss during a quite heated argument..."

"You lie," she snorted under her breath.

"Yes, I do," I admitted. "But we came SO very close to doing so many, many times at the apex of anger."

"That doesn't count."

"Who gives a Fizzing Whizbee? I sure as Merlin don't. The point I am trying to make is, when you quarrel with a bloke often, usually that is an indication that you both fancy each other. There is a fine line between love and hate, you know. And in the heat of anger, your furious passion can turn into another type. Quite the delightful type, if I say so myself..."

"But we don't quarrel often," Parvati said with confusion. Her bewilderment was justified. I was puzzling even myself with my logic- something that seemed to be happening more and more often.

"It doesn't MATTER," I sighed. "Just DO IT or else I will tell the whole school about your short fling with a certain Vincent Crabbe..."

"That happened in FOURTH YEAR!" Parvati protested. "And it lasted for all of 5 minutes- I was on a dare!"

"I don't care what you were on...I will blab unless YOU snog!"

"Fine." Cheeks VERY rosy (one of the few times I have EVER seen the collected, self-assured Parvati Patil blush), the witch aggressively slammed her mouth into Dean's plump lips. The receiver-of-her-snogs, I noticed with no little satisfaction, seemed to be enjoying himself QUITE much, as indicated by the little moans and sounds of contentment he was making.

* * *

"Parvati! Dean!" Lavender gasped, letting go of her ex-boyfriend's hair as watching her two good friends with surprise written across he face. 

"Yes, that WOULD be their names," I smiled sweetly.

"When I heard the sounds of snogging, I assumed that it was you and Ron!" Lavender informed me. "Where is he, by the way?"

My eyes widened. In trying to convince Parv to kiss Dean, who she had fancied for YEARS but never worked up the nerve to do anything about, I'd forgotten all about the fact that Ron was alone with a seductress in MY dormitory. A seductress who had 99 percent of the male population of Hogwarts wrapped around her little finger (the exception, of course, being Draco and Harry).

Before I could do anything, however, my legs were swept out from beneath me.

"Bloody, Hermione, I didn't know you were there!" Ron apologized, helping me get up from the wooden floor (the door to the dormitory had hit the back of my legs as he had opened it).

"I'm fine," I murmured, trying to figure out how much of a social faux pas it would be to rub my aching buttocks in front of six other people.

"Well then, good-night, Love." He rubbed my arm lightly as he and Seamus attempted to pry Dean away from Parvati.

"That's not FAIR," Dean griped.

"Yes it is, mate. None of us fancy seeing any little Parvatis or Deans running around 9 months from now, k?" Parvati looked HIGHLY affronted as she rebuttoned the first three buttons of her blouse.

"Have you any propriety, Parv?" I asked the dazed black-haired witch as, extremely puffy lips and all, she climbed into bed. "I mean, putting on a display like that..."

"You told me to kiss him." She shrugged before pulling her hangings shut.

"But not practically SHAG him," I grinned, before shooting Cassandra an icy glare- and when I mean icy, I am referring to SO cold that I'm surprised her face didn't freeze over as she received my VERY frosty look.

"Your boyfriend is SUCH a dear," Cass-Ass chuckled, before turning the lights out with a wave of her slender wand.

* * *

"A cat? Very clever choice, Miss Granger." 

"Well, you said at our second session that my animal should be something quite abundant in most habited areas and of a fairly small size." I blushed. "I reckoned that was a good choice."

"One of the best," Professor McGonagall winked as right before my eyes she turned into a stiff tabby cat.

Once she returned to her human form, I commented, "That fascinates even more than the first time I ever saw you do that because now I know just HOW difficult it is to be an Animagus."

"I see you've been doing your homework." Professor McGonagall nodded approvingly at the vast array of books in my messenger bag.

"Of course," I smiled politely. I needed SOMETHING to keep my mind off other things. It was late Sunday afternoon- 5 days had passed since the "delightfully deadly weapon" incident and the life had NOT gotten any better. Harry was still FURIOUS at me, Ginny was stuck in the middle, and Ron- well Ron was daft Ron as usual. He noticed something was up between Harry and I, but was too busy reading up on advanced Quidditch moves to comment on it. (He'd just found out that McGonagall had made him Captain). Cassandra was still dropping suggestive comments left and right, and constantly cozying up to Ron, but I was powerless to do anything about it. If I even mentioned to Ron my discomfort, he'd COMPLETELY blow up at me. Cassandra had become a rather touchy subject between us in the past few days. And worst of all, it was WAY too risky to meet up with Draco. And, to top it all off, Harry was STILL mad at me. Hmmphh.

Professor McGonagall must've noticed the look of unhappiness on my face, because she said uncharacterisitcally gently, "You know, Hermione, that we can discuss more things than Animaguses in this classroom. If there's anything- anything you wish to confide in me, I'm all ears. And, I would like to share with you that- excuse my lack of modesty- I'm rather good at giving advice."

"Oh, no. Nothing's wrong." I grinned weakly. "Honestly."

"It's not a very smart idea to refuse help when it's offered," my favorite teacher sighed, "but I will let it slip for just this one time. I know you have your pride, Hermione- you insist on figure things out on your own- but sometimes pride can get in the way of reasonable, logical thinking. You're not always alone in the battles you fight."

That thought followed me as I walked as slowly as possible to detention four hours later, not look forward to spending hours in the company of Cassandra, Draco, and Snape. Ha! Here was one battle I was going to be truly alone in- Draco had to pretend to still hate my slimy Mudblood guts, Snape DID hate my slimy Mudblood guts, and I don't even want to mention that arse of bimbo...

* * *

"I really don't feel too comorftable leaving you three alone." Snape cleared his throat. 

"Oh, don't worry Professor, I'll keep Draco from violently shagging Hermione on the lab table," Cassandra cooed.

"Funny. The last time I checked, Miss Granger was dating Mr. Weasley and absolutely loathed Mr. Malfoy. I was referring to _you,_ Miss Valet,and Mr. Malfoy. After the shennagins you pulled a few nights ago in a broom closet, I wouldn't be suprised if you and your companion have a hard time from restraining yourselves from copulating right here, in the dungeons, on one of MY lab tables instead of grading these first-year essays as I have assigned you."

I had bite my cheeks to keep from giggling. Even though Snape knew darn well that it had been ME, not Cass-Ass that night, he was pretending to the contrary and increasing my opinion of him by100 percent! Perhaps there was hope for that barmy old bat after all...

"All I ask that if you decide to participate in any sexual endeavors," Snape drawled, "Please keep the moaning to a minimum and do it right after I leave. I really don't fancy to be mentally scarred when I return in two hours. And do not allow Miss Granger to feel left out.I'm sure she would be MUCH obliged to join in and make it a _lovely_ threesome, don't you think?"

Or, maybe not. That bast...

Smirking, he went off to some unknown location or another, as he had done the past 7 days that I'd had detention.I was starting to get the idea that perhaps Snape didn't appreciate my company...


	17. Of Detentions

**53 reviews! I feel loved:-) I'd like to extend a huge thank-you to the following superb people who gave me much inspiration and happiness this past week with their fab reviews: FairyKisses, Angel-4rom-heaven, Margaret, Katie, Lor'sEvilRumour, Kurama'sfoxykitstune, milky way bar, cucu4cocopuffs, Debbie, Ron Lover 2005, Miss Hermione Granger17, Kitty Weasley KW, Mikayala Peterson, TrueBluePotterFan, wandless, terrifictypingtrio, Azu Luna, sailinmad, Tina, skysongscry, Lumos2000, xPussyWillowKittenx, NicciBubbles, the-insufferable-know-it-all, nennen, MIDNIGHT-PIXIE, unknownspecies, dancerrdw, aishteru, Nina-del-rio, suckr4romance, Huggles4All, weasleyandmoneylover, AshEllie, quidditchgurl07, Tria Marie Val, Sing-my-heart-out, Eowyn Organa, RandomSmirf13, WhiteRoseDancer, Ronsreallove, ThePhamtomIt14, quidditchgirl13, NotThePoke, and last, but not least, the anonymous reviewer who didn't type in a name. **

**Wheeew! This was _quite_ the busy and frustrating first week. With tons of homework and tests to study for every night, I was forced to write most of this chapter last night and this morning. But, hey, at least I got it done. That's how it's going to have to be most weeks,typing the chapter up the night before I post,so as long as the quality of the chapters I crank out doesn't decrease (I'm not saying that any of my chapters are high-quality to begin with, because I don't think they are- I just don't want my chapters to get any worse writing-wise) I don't mind. So, I'm not trying to make excuses, but if anything seems a little off in this chapter, it 's because I didn't write it over a course of 6 days, which I usually do, a bit a day. **

**This may seem to be a random question, but can anyone think of a good, original (not coined by anyone else), witty aphorism? I need to make up five for an English assignment and I can barely think of one...help would be appreciated if any of you readers know what I'm talking about! Just email me the aphorism or include it in your review. You don't know how much I would appreciate it... :-)**

**I'd like to dedicate this chapter to FairyKisses, who is one of my most loyal and favorite reviewers! She leaves long, very inspiring reviews every week which truly make my day. Rock on, FairyKisses! This chapter is for YOU!**

**As usual, read, review, and, above all else, ENJOY! This story is semi-winding down...I'm thinking 4-ish more chapters.**

* * *

"Well, are you ladies ready to get down and dirty?" Draco wiggled his pale eyebrows suggestively. 

"Perhaps Cassandra is, Malfoy," I sniffed. "Unlike her, I actually have morals, common sense, and I'm not a slag. Also, I do not, by my own will, spend time with the likes of you."

"All least I'm not a prune," the bimbo sniggered.

"The feeling's mutual, Granger," Draco drawled. "I would rather be kissing Parkinson than sitting in detention with YOU for a week."

"Well, that should come as no shock, seeing as you and Pansy are _quite_ tight," I sniggered. "Have you impregnated her yet?"

"No, I have certainly NOT, Granger, considering I find her to be the most despicable creature on this mortal Earth. After you, of course."

"Who would you rather shag- Hermione or Pansy?" Cassandra asked sweetly.

"Neither, but if I had to choose it would have to Pansy. At least she isn't a hoity-toity know-it-all Mudblood," Draco sneered.

The Slytherin was EXCELLENT at this sort of thing- then again he had a LOT of practice. Such as the past six years. His acting skills were absolutely SUPERB. They HAD to be, seeing as he had Voldemort thought that his right-hand man's son was one hundred percent loyal to him...I felt a new, deep sense of respect well up in me for Draco- and, well Snape. Both were risking their lives every day in order to give the Order secret information that could turn the tide of the battle- and in the end, probably save the world. I admired Draco even more than that barmy old bat, because Snape, was, well, _Snape. _A middle-aged man who had been doing this for _years_ and actually had become a Death Eater in the first place by his own choice. Draco, on the other hand, was an innocent 17-year old who had his whole life ahead of him and yet had to pretend to worship the Darkest Wizard in all of history. No teenager should have to bear the burdens that were on the sexy blonde's rather sculpted chest at the moment- then again, Harry, Ron and I were in the same boat- our lives could be extinguished ANY moment. That thought rather dampened my already wet spirits, and I sighed.

"Oh, Hermione, does that offend you?"

"No, Cassandra, it does NOT, seeing as I would choose even SNAPE over Malfoy ANY day."

"I find that quite disturbing." Professor Snape smirked as he leaned against the doorjamb.

"Where did YOU come from?" I snapped, my face turning an unbecoming shade of red at the fact that Severus Snape actually thought that I would rather have a heavy snogging session with him rather than Malfoy. Heck, any living, breathing female at Hogwarts would have to be CRAZY to want Snape's slimy, cold lips instead of Draco's extremely talented ones. He was THAT sexy- absolutely DROP-DEAD SEXY. And all of my peers were pathetically superficial, as was I at times, to be honest.

"I come from the hallway, Miss Granger," he said greasily. "I forgot my quill. I certainly do NOT appreciate your lack of respect towards me. Especially since you seem to think so...highly of me, may I say?"

"Oh, she does, Professor." Cass nodded her head emphatically. "You should hear how she talks about you in the dormitory. I've told her over and over again that it is DOWNRIGHT inappropriate, not to mention ILLEGAL to pursue a relationship with you, but she SIMPLY doesn't listen!"

Bimbo Barbie was certainly going to find some nasty surprises the next morning, one being that all her scanty little miniskirts would be gone and in their place would be ankle-length Laura Ingalls Wilder-style skirts. _"Nah,_" I mentally scratched that idea out. She would sooner go to breakfast with nothing but her knickers and blouse under her robes, much to the happiness of all the teenage wizards- and that pervert of a Potions professor- than actually dress _modestly. _

"Tsk, tsk, I'm sure Mr. Weasley would _love_ to hear this particular bit of news, wouldn't he?' Snape smiled extremely wickedly as for the second time in the evening he exited the room, jet-black (figures) quill in hand.

"I don't like you, you slimy git," I hissed after his back as Cassandra cackled. "In fact, I bloody loathe you..."

"Oh, we truly do need to work on our anger management skills, don't we?" The Ice Princess adopted a baby-voice.

"Some of us clearly need to work on our not being a ... skills" ( A long list of expletives _perfectly_ describing Cass followed, which I need not go into great detail about for obvious reasons.)

"You're a feisty one, Granger, I'll have to give you that," Draco remarked grudgingly as I finished and stood there gasping for breath, thoroughly winded after using profanity non-stop for ten minutes.

"I try my very best- all in the hopes of pleasing you, of course," I growled.

* * *

"You owe me BIG, Hermione. REAL big." 

"I do? That is certainly news to me because I don't remember asking you to do anything for me that would put me in your debt."

"Harry...is NOT mad at you any more!" Ginny said triumphantly.

"That's rich of you, taking credit for a wizard's own personal choice."

"Ah, but I _deserve_ the credit," Ginny said mysteriously.

I threw down my Transfiguration essay in frustration.

"Why, may I ask?" I asked crossly.

"You see, Hermione, one of my many gifts is convincing guys to change their minds. Especially my _boyfriend."_ She put a special emphasis on the word "boyfriend" and wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

"Spare me the explicit details; I already feel quite ill," I said sourly as I watched Cassandra give a tinkling laugh at something Ron said and purposely leaned over so she was falling out of her magenta blouse. Thank Merlin it was now Thursday- only two more nights of resisting the urge to use the most Unforgivable Curse of all on that bimbo.

* * *

"I can't BELIEVE IT!" I slammed my messenger bag down in detention Friday night. 

"You better believe it, love," Draco drawled as he peered out the grimy window over my shoulder. "Somehow, or some way, using one of her innumerable talents, Cassandra wrangled her way out of detention tonight."

"She probably seduced Snape," I hypothesized, before blanching at the VERY disturbing image that rose in my mind.

"I wouldn't put it past her," Draco said bitterly, running a slender hand through his silky locks of blonde as he leaned against the windowsill, wrinkling his nose when his expensive black robes acquired a layer of dust from contact with the obviously-not-cleaned-for-awhile- surface.

"So, do you have any more bright ideas?" I asked half-heartedly, writing a huge "D" at the top of one particularly atrociously written essay by a second-year Hufflepuff.

"I've been thinking." He shrugged his lean shoulders. Dang, he was incredibly SEXY. This was getting slightly ridiculous. It should've certainly NOT been allowed for SO much attractiveness to belong to one_ bloke._ Hmmph. If I was half as good-looking as him, I could _easily_ model for any of the agencies described in Witch Weekly.

"Ideas, please," I sighed, dipping my quill back into the red inkpot.

"Non-existent, unfortunately." Draco frowned and continued watching the Gryffindor tryouts. After a few minutes he let out a rather large groan.

"Well? Care to enlighten me?"

"She's every good bit as bloody brilliant at Quidditch as I'd suspected," he said darkly. "Not like I expected anything different..."

My suspicions rose.

"Just what DID you expect?" I asked curiously. "And you've obviously known Cassandra from before, haven't you?"

His handsome features were contorted into a look a pain, as though he was struggling to tell me something but simply _couldn't. _

"I can't tell you, Hermione," he said weakly. "If I could, I would. But I honestly can't..."

"Yes, you can tell me," I snapped, the frustrations of the week catching up to me. "It's not too difficult- you just open up your mouth and allow the words to come out..."

I was caught off with an intense intake of breath from Draco as he clutched his forearm.

"He's calling to us," he breathed unnecessarily, for I had already had a keen idea of what was going on.

"Oh, Merlin!" I started shivering uncontrollably.

"I'll be alright, Hermione." Draco tried to comfort me, although his face was the deathliest shade of white. Taking a deep breath, he pulled out his wand and cleaned the dust off his robes, his hand shaking.

"We've got to leave, Draco." An also-extremely -paler-than-usual Snape came running into the Dungeons three minutes later without a glance at my direction. (I assumed that Dumbledore had informed him that I knew about Draco's true allegiance.). "Miss Granger, you're to stay here for another two hours to finish your detention and do NOT, I repeat, DO NOT tell anyone of what you have seen here tonight." With a final glance in my direction, Draco donned the Invisibility Cloak that his fellow Death Eater (and fellow spy) handed him and disappeared into thin air. I sank to the floor and pulling my knees to my chest, I cried. Cried for the fact that my friends and I were forced to become mature beyond our years. Cried for our loss of childhood- and innocence. Cried for the terrible truth that this was supposed to be the BEST time of our lives- our teenage years- and instead, it was the absolute worst. Cried that there was a bloody good chance (around 83 percent, I calculated) that none of us would live to see the year 1998. Cried that this could very well be the absolute last time I ever saw the leaves of fall change from a light green to a fiery red. Blood red.

* * *

"Oh, _Ronald,_ thank you SO MUCH!" Cassandra threw her arms around a blushing Ron's neck after she saw the new Quidditch roster. 

"Oh, it was nothing on MY part," Ron said modestly, puffing his muscular chest out. "It was you who did the bloody brilliant job at flying and earned yourself the position!"

"Kill me now," I ordered Ginny, who grimaced.

"Kill _me,"_ she said bleakly. "I have to actually _cooperate_ with HER! And I have to resist the urge at every practice and game to launch the Quaffle with all my might at her pretty little face!"

"Gin, there is absolutely NO reason to restrain yourself from doing so," I said gloomily. "Please do go right ahead."

"Yes, if I want to be kicked off the team and spend the rest of the year in detention with Snape," she snorted. "Count me out."

"Harry would certainly support you," I whispered, shooting a glance at the handsome bespectacled young man who was glaring at Cassandra with obvious dislike.

"Fat lot of help that would be. Now, do you want to be the one to go over there and break up that little love-fest, or should I?"

"Both of us," I stated firmly.

"Hermione, isn't this great?" Ron asked me excitedly.

"It's _wonderful._" I pasted a large grin on my face as I turned to Bimbo Barbie. "Great job, Cass. I only wish that _I _could fly as good as you!"

"Oh, I'm nothing special." She giggled in an unsuccessful attempt at modesty.

Ron opened his large mouth. "Yes, she..."

I didn't let him finish his sentence (which I was bloody sure would end with the word 'is').

"Ron, are we leaving for Hogsmeade soon?" I inquired, possessively putting my arm around his waist. "It's almost 9 o'clock."

"Soon, love," he grinned. "Patience is a virtue."

Cassandra was now looking at Ron and I "timidly." Ha. Timidly my arse.

"Er, if it wouldn't be a huge bother..." she began "shyly"..."could I perhaps go with you guys to Hogsmeade? No one has asked me, and I simply don't want to walk around alone..."

"No problem!" Ron said cheerfully. "You can come with me, 'Mione, Gin and Harry! The more the merrier!'

I stared at him in disbelief. This was supposed to be a _double date- _and the first real date Ron and I had been on for MONTHS. WHAT in merlin _WAS HE THINKING?"_


	18. Of a Quite Irate Ronald Weasley

**Woot! 43 reviews! I'd first like to thank the following awesome guys and gals who really uplifted me during this frustrating and challenging second week of school:Kurama'sfoxykitsune,goblin monkey, Nina-del-rio, fran, lacatamar, rainydyz07, unknownspecies, Huggles4All, Things-One-and-Two, Kitty Weasley KW, Sing-my-heart-out, katie, debbie, Ron Lover 2005, anonymous r/hr shipper, Sailor Piglet, Azu Luna, CassieLupin, AshEllie, FairyKisses, Eowyn Organa, xPussyWillowKittenx, Warlock, nycegurl, aishteru, milky way bar, CG, TrueBluePotterFan, gryffinquill94, Tria Marie Val, Endless Potential, Elise, the-insufferable-know-it-all, SafetyXPins, Darkmoonfang, Lumos2000, doublelily, dancerrdw, rgluvr13, RandomSmirf13, Ronsreallove, ThePhantomIt14, Lucy, EponineWeasley, and last, but certainly not least, quidditchgirl13. I love you fabulous people to pieces!**

**Happy early birthday to me! I'm turning the big 15 on Wednesday, so...I dunno..birthday wishes would be appreciated? Eeeek, I sound pathetic..and shameless! And I do apologize for that. But you know what I mean!**

**As I have mentioned before, I'm nearing the end of this fiction. Around 3 to 5 more chapters to go (I increased the number), approximately, depending on many factors. Anyway, so that's anywhere from 3 to 5 weeks to go, so I'm already starting to think of my next story idea. I have ZILLIONS of plot bunnies, and the following are a few of my favorite and the ones which I think are most do-able. Your opinion(s) would be valued greatly!**

**- A collection of fluffy one-shots focusing on various pairings (Ron and Hermione, Harry and Ginny, Lily and James) entitled "Redhead Love" or something along those lines.**

**- Another "fluffy-in-total-denial-dancing-around-feelings" Ron / Hermione romance, only this time it'll be Post-Hogwarts- either Ron and Hermione are training to be Aurors or they're flat mates. But both of those ideas are SO overdone, so I'm no longer too crazy about this...however, if I could somehow do a clever twist on it, such as a parody...which brings me to my next and second-to-last idea...**

**- A parody of some sorts, parodying (for lack of a better word!) either Ron / Hermione or Draco / Hermione romances. Now this could be quite fun! Bwahaha! I have so many ideas for this one... and, finally...**

**- A humorous romance / drama featuring..the journals of the professors at Hogwarts! This one would also be VERY amusing to write. Each chapter would be a witty excerpt from the journal of one of the professors (the first chapter, which I have quite a good start on, would be entitled "The Musings of Minerva."). It would take place in Harry's fourth year and include (obviously!) lots of humor, romance, drama, etc...right now, I'm leaning towards this one, but...**

**I need to know your honest opinions! I don't want to write something that you fabulous reviewers will not enjoy! So give me suggestions or comment on the ones I have mentioned! I can't make any promises, but I will try to make my next story one that you will support!**

**I'd like to dedicate this chapter to my extremely loyal and wonderful reviewer, suckr4romance, who unfortunately was a victim of Hurricane Katrina and was forced to abandon her home and live elsewhere for a while. She doesn't know what she'll encounter when she finally returne to her house in Louisiana and is going through a tough time. So PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE! keep her and all the other victims of that terrible catastrophe in your prayers and donate money to an excellent organization such as the Red Cross! **

* * *

At the exact time that my hero, Harry, was about to open his mouth to hopefully say something along the lines of, "Ron, can I speak with you for a moment?" in a rather tight voice, I made a split-second decision. 

"Er, that sounds great Ron, because then there'll be four people in the group!" I chirped. "Perfect amount for a booth at the Three Broomsticks!"

"Four?" He furrowed his red brow. "That means that..."

"Yes, I'm not going," I let out a laugh. "Go on without me. I just remembered that I'm extremely behind on my school work. I'll spend the day in the library. Don't worry a single bit about me!" Ha. I'd stayed up until 1 o'clock nearly every night to finish all my essays after detention, and was completely caught-up. The truth was, there was NO way in Godric that I was going to stomach EIGHT hours of constant Cassandra / Ron interactions if I could help it. I'd pray feverishly that Ginny would do her duty and keep those two apart in my absence, because, quite frankly, if I went along, by the end of the day I'd be vomiting and heart-broken. It would be best to avoid it.

If Ron actually bought that, he would have to be even dafter that I had originally believed.

"If you say so," he said, his face falling. My own face fell too. He REALLY didn't have a clue whatsoever. Hmmph. "But it won't be the same without you."

Duh. We were supposed to be going on a DATE- I would hope that it wouldn't be the same without me.

"Bye, guys! See you at dinner!" I made to dash to the dormitory when Ginny grabbed my arm.

"Do you really think this is a smart idea, 'Mione, leaving those two without a chaperone?"

"Ron is a big boy," I said in a high voice. "He is quite capable of behaving himself. And I assumed that YOU could keep an eye on them."

"B-but Harry and I wanted to sneak off for some 'alone time,'" Ginny whispered.

"Well, you'll have to change your plans. Please, Gin, it'll be for you own good. You're much too young to get pregnant."

Ginny blushed a violent red.

"Harry and I wouldn't go THAT far," she hissed. "For the love of Godric, do you think I'm some sort of scarlet woman?"

The corners of my mouth twitched, despite my mood.

"No, not _really_, Ginny. But you certainly do need to watch yourself. I know how difficult it can be..."

"All right, all right I get the idea. I will my very best NOT to do anything greater than a PG-13 rating with Harry AND to keep Cassandra from jumping Ron," she vowed. "Happy?"

"No, but it'll do. Have a lovely day in the only all-Wizarding village in all of Britain!" I said loudly as I shooed them out the portrait hole and then collapsed on the couch in misery.

"Er, are you all right?" A timid voice asked me. I grouchily raised my eyes to see a pretty girl of about twelve years with beautiful ash blonde hair and hazel eyes.

"Hello, Ashley," I sighed, mustering a smile for the petite second-year. "I'm fine."

"No, you are NOT," she insisted.

"Yes I AM," I said crossly, massaging my forehead in frustration.

"C'mon, Hermione, you can tell me what's wrong."

"It's nothing. Girl problems."

"_I'm _a girl," Ashley said stubbornly. "You can tell ME!"

"_Older_ girl problems, Ashley." I emphasized the word "older."

"Oh, you mean like menstruation? Mum got me a book about the birds and the bees AGES ago- I know everything! I can help you!"

Ashley Carson was WAY too clever for her own good. Still, I felt a sisterly kind of affection towards the girl- we talked on the occasion, I helped her with particularly tricky assignments, and I comforted her in the first year after a particularly nasty Slytherin boy made fun of her extremely cute pigtails. We were friends of a sort, I reckon you could say, - even though there was a 6-year age difference between us.

"No, no, it's not that...it has to do with my boyfriend."

"Is Ron being incredibly daft again?"

Merlin, this gal should've seriously been pushed up a year.

"Yes, unfortunately," I groaned. "And no offense meant to you at all, but I REALLY don't want to talk about it."

"Fine, fine," she pouted. The her young face brightened. "Then you can help me with my Transfiguration assignment, right?"

I resigned myself to spending the morning in the Common Room, helping the wee little Gryffindors with their essays. Hey, I wasn't complaining. At least it kept my mind off of particular..._other things._

* * *

After eating a meager amount of lunch (I scarcely had an appetite) and finishing an extra-credit essay for Charms, it was around 3 o'clock. I had a good 45 minutes before students would start trickling back in from their day out, so I decided to go to- where else?- but the library. 

"Draco!" I gasped with surprise. "What are YOU doing here? Shouldn't you be at Hogsmeade?"

"I could ask you the same question," Draco said grumpily. "And please keep your voice down. I don't want to advertise the fact that _I'm_ sitting at a table in the Hogwarts library, with _Hermione Granger,_ when I could be frittering my money away at that ridiculous candy shop." He dragged me by the arm into the most secluded corner in the whole library- one that was well-known as to have hidden many a snogging couple from the watchful eyes of Madame Pince.

"Just because my boyfriend is being idiotic," I snapped, "doesn't mean that you're entitled to KISS me."

"You flatter yourself WAY too much, Hermione." Draco put a companionable arm around my shoulders. "Yes, you may look and feel like dragon dung at the moment, but I DO NOT plan on snogging those luscious lips of your in order to cheer you up. Even though you are a brilliant kisser. Frankly, I would MUCH rather shag you- you need a good shag DESPERATELY."

Suddenly, all of the color drained from his face, as had happened the previous night when he was summoned by Voldemort.

"Draco!" I said urgently. "What's wrong?" I gulped when he just mouthed wordlessly, and I quickly whipped out my wand. Did _Voldemort himself_ somehow sneak into Hogwarts or something? For rarely did one see the usually cocky-and-self-confident 17-year so frightened.

"B-b-behind you, Hermione," he stuttered, pointing a shaky finger over my right shoulder.

"Yes, I've gathered that whatever is behind me is invoking fear in you," I pointed out. "Now why don't you just tell..." But, alas, I never got the chance to finish my sentence, for the mystery person was now standing in FRONT of me. And, Merlin, by the absolutely FURIOUS expression across his extremely enraged face, I concluded that he was rather angry at Draco...and I...

In the most eloquent words ever known to mankind, I said...

* * *

"Dammnit! Ron!" 

"Dammnit is right, Hermione," my-soon-to-be-ex-boyfriend sneered.

"Why are you back so early?" I asked lamely. "And where's everyone else?"

"I left the other three early so I could come back and see how _YOU _were doing_," _he growled. "Am I interrupting something?"

"Oh, no, no, no, Weasley," Draco laughed. "You really think I would associate with the likes of HER by my own free choice? We were just working on an Ancient Runes project."

"_Hermione_ doesn't take Ancient Runes this year," Ron scowled. "_I_ should know- I used to be her boyfriend."

I winced at his usage of the word "used to be."

"Honestly, Weasley , NOTHING was happening. I can assure you of that. I would never dream of moving in on YOUR girlfriend."

"Oh? Nothing was happening? Should I really believe that, especially since YOUR arm is around HER shoulders?"

Ooops. Draco hurriedly removed his muscular arm.

"And furthermore, you two were discussing KISSING and shagging. And YOU..." he pointed to Draco... "said that HERMIONE is a brilliant KISSER! It doesn't take a GENIUS to figure out that HERMIONE has been CHEATING on ME behind MY BACK!"

I was quite impressed that Ron only had sworn ONE TIME in the past three minutes, but it also depressed me greatly. Did I mean that little to him?

"Ron..." I began, close to tears. "You HAVE to have faith in me. Draco and I are only friends- nothing more and nothing less. We both happened to be working on essays in the library when we ran into each other..."

"_FRIENDS?"_ Ron spat. "You are FRIENDS with this low-lying piece of scum?"

"Yes, I am," I said in a quivery voice, holding my head high.

His cobalt blue eyes were alight with fury.

"Funny, I recollected you swearing UP AND DOWN that you weren't mates with Malfoy and would NEVER EVER do so quite a few times in the past two weeks," Ron sneered. "So you expect me to believe ANY word that comes out of your mouth? You've lied to me SO many times, Hermione. Cassandra was right..."

"Cassandra? Just what did Cassandra say?" I growled.

"She hinted that you were cheating on me!" The redhead cried. "And then I find out that it was with bloody Draco Malfoy, no less! At least if you were going to be unfaithful to me, go after some bloke that doesn't want you, your two best mates, and everyone on the side of Light dead!"

"Don't talk about things you don't understand, Ronald," I snapped, nodding my head towards the blond Slytherin who trying to sneak out of the corner unnoticed. "Draco isn't..."

"I don't bloody CARE what Draco isn't! What I care about is that behind my back, you snogged and did Merlin-knows-what-else with this bas...! You BETRAYED ME!"

"I didn't do ANYTHING with him," I said quietly. "And if you don't think I'm being truthful..."

"Hell, I KNOW you're not being truthful," Ron snorted, violently shaking me. "I heard Malfoy with my own two ears! He thinks you're a brilliant kisser!"

"Well, Cassandra says the same of you!" I retorted, removing myself from his tight grasp. "And you don't see ME going around falsely accusing YOU of having a romantic relationship with Cassandra!"

His accusing eyes narrowed.

"So THAT'S what this is all about," he said slowly. "Cassandra. You thought you'd be able to make me insanely jealous by kissing this git when I wasn't looking. Well, you've succeeded- I AM insanely jealous. But also insanely beside myself with anger. We're over, Hermione. For GOOD! If you can't respect that fact that I can have other female acquaintances, then I certainly want OUT of this relationship." And with those final ever-so-kind words, Ronald Weasley stepped out of the secluded corner- and my life.

"Sucks to be you," Draco said in his attempt at sympathetically.

"Yes, it certainly sucks to be me." I burst into gut-wrenching sobs.

* * *

"Ron and Cassandra. Ron and Cassandra. You don't know how sick and tired I'm getting of hearing that phrase OVER and OVER again," I said through gritted teeth tears still filling my eyes as the terrible truth hit me with a hard blow, even after 21 days of enduring my ex-boyfriend (and ex-best mate) and that slag swapping spit 24 / 7. 

"Tell me about it." Ginny rolled her eyes in exasperation. "It's bloody all he talks about these days."

Harry rubbed my shoulder.

"You know, Hermione, they'll have to break up _eventually,"_ he said in his version of a consoling manner.

"Fat lot of comfort that is," I snapped. "For in case you've forgotten, Ron ever-so gently told me that we were over for GOOD. " For good" usually translates to mean "FOREVER."

"At least you don't have to hear about every single detail of each of their snogging sessions," Harry groaned. "Let me tell you, the way he talks, Cassandra must be nearly a PROFESSIONAL at it!"

"You insensitive wart," Ginny admonished him, hitting him over the head with her Transfiguration book as I fled to the safe haven of my dormitory, full-fledged tears streaming down my cheeks. Er, let me re-phrase myself there. I was _planning_ on fleeing to the safe haven of my dormitory, but quickly changed my mind when I heard the most some rather suspicious moaning and groaning sounds that insinuated something of a rather intimate manner was occurring in the room. And I had quite the keen suspicion of just who the witch and wizard were who were engaging in such inappropriate acts...


	19. Of the Ball

**64 reviews! Fizzing Whizbees! I'd like to thank the following wonderful guys and gals who left such inspiring comments on Chapter 18: Katie, SafetyXPins, sailorstarryeyes, True Slytherin Witch, kArlITaLUna, Lucy, lenadeansgrl13, ShadowHexx771, hermione256, Blackness Angel,Sailor Piglet, FairyKisses, kitotterkat, Nina-del-rio, Kitty Weasley KW, prettigurl7, Lucy The Rat, whatevs, suckr4romance, Darkmoonfang, Sing-my-heart-out, Hayls21, xox.Annie Potter.xox, Elise, laura truewood, rainydyz07, -TheSinging Blob-, weasleyandmoneylover, goblin monkey, Ron Lover 2005, Liz, Fidelian, rgluvr13, waterfaerie15, unknownspecies, doublelily, skysongscry, Cassondra, ThePhantomIt14, Things-One-and-Two, NicciBubbles, ladyro7, Katie, Huggles4All, the-insufferable-know-it-all, AshEllie, blackrose713, Endless Potentail, nycegurl, hermione256, Eowyn Organa, RandomSmirf13, aishteru, TrueBluePotterFan, gryffinquill94, xPussyWillowKittenx, dancerrdw, EponineWeasley, quiddithgirl13, Rachel, and last, but CERTAINLY not least, Lumos2000.**

**I really do apologize for posting this close to 8 hours later than I normally do (winces). I had a busy week and basically had to try to finish this chapter this morning, but I worked at my school district's used instrument sale from 9 until 12 and I wasn't completely done with Chapter 19 by 9 and I really didn't want tojust hastily scribble a few lines to finish itoff, so I had to wait until I got home from the sale,eating out with my parents, and shopping for a dress for Homecoming (haha..what an interesting experience! My first time ever buying a "real" dress...do you realize how hard it is to find a MODEST dress? Ridiculously! ) until I could post. So I am sincerely sorry- next week I should be posting more around a normal time.**

**Thank you VERY much for the awesome feedback! The majority of reviewers either said the teachers' journals or "Redheaded Love," so I think I'll go with either of those- probably with the former!**

**Now, without further ado, I present you Chapter 19! Read, review, and, above all else, ENJOY:-)**

* * *

"He was completely all over her," I miserably informed the petite redhead. 

Ginny raised an eyebrow.

"I'm sorry, I simply must've misheard you. Did you say "he? Because the last time I checked, my brother wasn't the most aggressive of blokes."

"Well, he could be- at times," I said sadly, my cheeks reddening as I remembered some of our more passionate snogging sessions.

"Where there any clothes removed?"

"No, thank MERLIN!" I sighed. "But they looked like they were bloody close to it. And worst of all, they were on MY BED!"

"You can sleep in here tonight," Ginny suggested kindly. "I can conjure a cot up for you or something. The other girls won't mind- honestly!"

"Thanks, Gin," I said with no small relief.

"Eh, don't mention it," she grinned. "After all, what are friends for?"

I winced.

"I do need to apologize for something," I said morosely. "I really haven't been a great friend to either you or Harry these past few weeks."

"Well, you HAVE been rather distracted," Ginny said delicately, scrunching up her nose as she removed a moldy sandwich from underneath her four-poster bed. "Ick, where did THIS come from?"

"This is the first time you've cleaned under your bed since school started?" I asked her incredulously.

"Yes," the youngest Weasley said rather defensively, vanishing the disease-carrying organism with a flick of her wand. "Unlike SOME people, I'm not cleanliness and organizationally obsessive!"

"I haven't had much else to occupy my time with," I said quietly. "Seeing as my wonderful snogging partner has purposely walked out of my life."

"Oh, Hermione," Ginny said softly, "You really do need to stop dwelling on that so much and just GO ON with life!"

"Just _go on?"_ I snapped, my temper rising. "Would you just "go on" with life if Harry dumped you for a twit like _Cassandra? _I _highly_ doubt that, Gin. I REALLY do."

"Well, NO," she admitted, "But you do realize that you ARE partially to blame for the break-up."

"Yes, there really is a DIRE need for me to hear that, especially since that particular thought runs through my mind EVERY SINGLE TIME I SEE THOSE TWO TOGETHER!" I said, my voice laced with heavy sarcasm.

"I'm sorry," Ginny apologized. "And, honestly, Hermione, if it wouldn't get me thrown in Azkaban, I'd _Avada Kedavra_ Cassandra in a split-second."

"Eh, you can murder her, here at Hogwarts. TRUST ME, Dumbledore will NOT care in the least. It's obvious that he doesn't think too highly of her. Neither does McGonagall. And the Ministry has MUCH more important things to worry about than suspicious death of a bloody slaggy bimbo," I said darkly.

"You certainly are violent, Hermione. I never knew this side of you before Cassandra entered the picture!"

"You sure as heck haven't seen the last of it, dear."

* * *

"A BALL?" My mouth dropped open. "You have GOT to be kidding me." 

Professor McGonagall had dropped the bombshell at the end of our twelfth mentoring session.

"Hermione, do I ever lie?" She sighed. "I just heard it from Albus today. He feels that it will promote inter-house unity."

"Well, no offense, Professor, but he is right out of his mind!" I informed her boldly. "A Christmas Ball, helping the inter-house unity? Phpt. It's more likely to increase the animosity between the Slytherins and us..."

"Headmaster Dumbledore ALWAYS has a reason behind his madness," Professor McGonagall said fondly. "However, you did not allow me to finish what I was saying! It will be an_ EXTREMELY formal _ball, and you girls are allowed to, if you choose, wear Muggle dress."

"Oh, that makes it even BETTER," I said dismally, imagining the incredibly sexy and immodest slinky red little number that Cassandra would choose to wear and how Ron would be mentally undressing her with his eyes...and perhaps physically with his hands. Ick.

"I do understand why you're not too thrilled about this, Hermione," McGonagall said knowledgeably. "But really, dear, you will have to try to put that out of your mind and just enjoy the evening!"

"ENJOY the evening?" I stared at her incredulously. "You know the kind of girl Cassandra Valet is, Professor. And you KNOW how she will dress. Do you really think I'd fancy watching Ron- who still happens to be the LOVE OF MY LIFE- have to physically restrain himself from ravishing her on the dance floor?"

"That is QUITE enough, Hermione," my favorite teacher said sternly. "Since when did strong, independent Hermione let a WIZARD rule HER life?"

"Since she fell in love. Six and half years ago."

"Many, many years ago," McGonagall began in a dreamy voice, "when I first started teaching at Hogwarts, I fell head-over-heels for a certain member of the staff..."

"Dumbledore," I suggested. Her nod confirmed my beliefs.

"Oh, how I loved Albus, once upon a time. I knew every minute of his schedule, how he ate treacle tarts (the last time I checked, there really was only ONE way, but I didn't feel like pointing that out), even at what times he visited the loo!"

"If you'll excuse me for saying this, Professor," I began hesitantly, "That's a smidgen pathetic."

"Love can _certainly_ make even the most sensible women slightly pathetic," she agreed. "Anyway, as you know, Albus Dumbledore is- and always was- quite in-tune to the world around him and can sense things that few can. Well, I can't be giving him TOO much credit- I certainly did not conceal my feelings that well, because after all, I was a naïve 25 year old, falling in love for the very first time. However, one evening he pulled me aside...

_"I cannot give you what you seek, Minerva,"_ _he toldme gently. "We must just remain friends- and nothing more."_

"How did you EVER go on with life?" I asked, imagining if Ron- Ron who I still loved more than life itself- would've told me that summer between fifth and sixth year that we could never pursue a romantic relationship. Heck, I'd be feeling a thousand times worse than I did right now- and that was certainly saying something!

My wise mentor sighed.

"I just did, Hermione. Somehow, somewhere within me I found a pool of strength that I never even knew existed that enabled me to continue living. Oh, I was devastated for quite some time, but eventually I began to smile again and chuckle."

"But you don't understand, Professor- I've loved Ron with a passion ever since I laid eyes on him that first fateful time on the Hogwarts Express! I dreamt about him every night for five years, until he finally got up the guts to admit his feelings to me! Whenever I picture my future, there is absolutely NO other man than Ronald Weasley walking up the aisle with me. I imagine waking up in the morning in his embrace- our little bushy-red-haired children running into our bedroom, asking what's for breakfast..." I, with no little embarrassment, accepted the handkerchief that Professor McGonagall handed me and dabbed at my eyes. "Don't you see? I can't just "go on" with life! It's _impossible!"_ My heart belongs to Ronald Weasley and Ronald Weasley alone!"

"I never said that you have to stop loving him," McGonagall corrected me quietly. "I still held love for Albus, in the deepest chamber of my heart, until I met Murdo. I'm just saying that you can't let this ruin your life. Hermione, if Ron truly is your one-and-only, you two WILL be together again. It may be 3 months, may be five years."

"Thank you, Professor," I managed to crack a weak grin in the direction of my mentor, who in turn did something quite uncharacteristic for her normally stoic personality. She pulled me into a quick hug and whispered, "I will be quite disturbed if I'm not invited to the wedding."

* * *

"We can go to the ball together!" Draco informed me. 

"Why, isn't that most exciting!" I chirped. "Whatever happened? If I can recall, at the beginning of the year you said that we simply could NOT be seen together at ANY TIME. So, why the sudden change of heart?"

"Perhaps I would just like to go to the Christmas Ball with you," Draco said huskily.

"Uh-uh. I'm not going to buy that line," I laughed. "There's a reason for this, isn't there?"

"Yes- but it's very complicated and I- I can't tell you," he stammered, now looking quite uncomfortable.

"Yes you can! It's not too difficult- you simply open up your mouth..." I trailed off, watching Draco's face grow paler and paler.

"I can't tell you, Hermione," he said shakily. "Honestly, if I could I would..."

It was as though a light bulb had gone off in my head.

"Voldemort," I breathed. "This has something to do with Voldemort, doesn't it?"

The sexy Slytherin flinched but did not answer me.

"I'll see you at the ball," he muttered, before fading back into the shadows of the Dungeon hallway.

* * *

"You look- there is no other word for it- HOT, Hermione," Ginny said approvingly as she did a final touch-up on my hair and makeup. 

"I reckon I do." I stole a glance at my reflection in the mirror of the dormitory and what quite pleased by the beautiful young woman I saw. She was wearing a delicate deep blue Muggle dress with spaghetti straps . Her normally bushy, rebellious hair was tamed into an attractive bun with two curly tendrils left out. A bit of lipstick and eye shadow, and her look was complete. "But you look even better. Harry is going to be _quite_ pleased with what he sees." Ginny was clad in a slightly risquésilky purple strapless Muggle dress. Her fiery hair flowed in beautiful waves down her back.

"He better bloody be," she winked. "After all, this dress did NOT come cheap."

"Well, Gin, are we ready to make some jaws drop?"

"You betcha."

Some jaws certainly did drop as we made our way down the Girl's staircase. Harry's, obviously. He pulled Ginny into his arms and gave her quite the passionate kiss the second he saw her.

"Harry, you ruined my lipstick," she fake-pouted.

Ron's mouth fell wide open too. I allowed myself a small smirk as I walked gracefully past him.

"You're looking particularly spiffy today," I whispered. All Ron did was give a slight nod, the tips of his ears turning a bright red.

'_HA! Victory!'_ I thought triumphantly. However, I deduced five seconds later that it wasn't my appearance that made the object-of-my-affections turn a becoming shade of red- it was seeing his girlfriend walk seductively down the staircase, clad in my absolute worst nightmare- a VERY skimpy, sparkly red Muggle dress.

"Oh _RONALD!"_ You look SO HANDSOME!" She cooed, swiveling her hips and engaging him in quite the furious kiss.

I turned to Parvati.

"I think I'm going to vomit," I confided. I'm sure Parvati would have answered, but I had chosen the most inopportune moment to talk to her, seeing as Dean was currently devouring her lips.

"I think I'm going to vomit," I tried to tell Lavender, but she was sucking face with a rather arrogant sixth year bloke.

Out of desperation, I turned to Ashley. "I think I'm going to vomit." Ashley, however- 12 year old Ashley!- was snogging her current boyfriend. Well, it _was_ just on the cheek. But still...kissing was kissing.

This was going to be one heck of a night.

* * *

"You're an excellent dancer," I sighed, leaning my head against Draco's incredibly muscular chest. 

"As are you," he smiled. "That has to be the reason why everyone's staring at us.They're obviously in awe of our brilliant talent at moving in small circles while holding on to each other.As you know, it takes SO much skill!"

"Nah," I giggled, trying desperately NOT to look over at the Cassandra-who-physically-could-not-be-pressed-up-any-closer-to-Ron's-body. "They're just all in shock about how Hermione Granger, bookworm extraordinaire, got the sexiest bloke at Hogwarts as a date!"

"Or, perhaps WHY the most clever witch at Hogwarts is choosing to dance with the biggest bleep bleep bleep bleep in the world," Harry said stiffly."May I cut in?" Even though Harry had grudgingly accepted my secret friendship with Draco, he still loathed the bloke with a passion.

"Only if I'm allowed to dance with your Weaslette," Draco smirked."She's looking delicious this fine evening."

"Why, you little..." Harry snapped, sneering. "I take back my offer."

"You do that, Potter. That way I have Hermione _all to myself_," he said suggestively, tracing my lips with one slender finger. "And, oh, the things I'm going to do with her..." The Boy-Who-Lived was simultaneously turning green around the gills and a bright red in the face, so I shut Draco up the only way I knew to- with a kiss.

"Well, don't you look _SWEET,"_ Cassandra said with a tinkling laugh, interrupting our lovely- and loveless-little kiss. "That dress really is divine- where did you buy it?"

I simply couldn't help myself.

"I'd ask YOU the same question about your absolutely _adorable_ dress, but I know that you purchased it at a shop specifically aimed towards prostitutes." I resumed my kiss with Draco, noticing with a bit of satisfaction that Ron was going more than a bit red in the face. The shade of red that was SO cute on him- and always had occured during our raging rows, especially those involving a certain Bulgarian with the initials V. K.

"He's JEALOUS!" I whispered excitedly to Draco when the two were out of earshot.

"I noticed," the dead sexy bloke said in a strained voice. "Now, are we going to dance more, or what?"

* * *

"Ron and Cassandra! They're GONE!" I said with dread an hour later, wringing my hands. "Where do you think they went?" 

"It's not where I think they went," Draco said grimly. "It's where I know they went. Hermione, follow me. We have a search-and-rescue mission to complete."

"Search-and-rescue?" I stared at him, my blood suddenly running cold.

"Yes, search-and-rescue. And please keep your voice down. And follow EVERY single instruction I give you. And I mean EVERY. Do I make myself crystal clear?"

"Draco, what's going on?" I asked in confusion.

"Plenty. And none of it's good. In fact, there is a chance that neither of us will ever see Hogwarts again in life."

* * *

**Ooooh...cliffhanger! We're quickly approaching the climax of the story, where the plot is unraveled and you learn everything! Please stick around- I know this chapter wasn't terribly exciting, but it was essential! **

**Coming up next Saturday morning..the third or fourth to last chapter!**


	20. Of Shrunken Wands

**Yeehaw! 56 reviews...thank you, thank you, THANK YOU to...: MysteryALASKA, sailorstarryeyes, lacatamar, doodlebug19, The Lady Luthien, TheDaughterOfKings, Lucy the Rat, skysongscry, rainydyz07, Phillyactress, Azu Luna, Kurama'sfoxykitsune, debbie, iluvspazmcgee, goblin monkey, Sing-my-heart-out, unknownspecies, the-insufferable-know-it-all, MIDNIGHT-PIXIE, xPussyWillowKittenx, kitotterkat, quidditchgirl13, AshEllie, waterfaerie15, Liz, Tria Marie Val, prettigurl7, Angel-4rom-heaven, Kitty Weasley KW, Lumos 2000, Huggles4All, milkywaybar, Katie, EponineWeasley, Ronsreallove, Blackness Angel, '.'.'.JessIca'.'.'., Endless Potential, FairyKisses, SafetyXPins, hermione-gurl787, Eowyn Organa, dancerrdw, HufflepuffQueen, NicciBubbles, weasleyandmoneylover, GerardWay'sFanClub, rgluvr13, RandomSmirf13, TrueBluePotterFan, Ron Lover 2005, aurora-sakura, True Slytherin Witch, Nina-del-rio, doublelily, suckr4romance, Lucy, and last, but _certainly_ not least, the awesome ThePhantomIt14!**

**Merlin, I'm almost in tears when I think that there's only about 2 chapters left to go in this fiction! You awesome guys and gals have given me SO much inspiration for the past FIVE months and have been unbelievably WONDERFUL, KIND, SWEET, FABULOUS, etc..! I love EVERY SINGLE one of you to pieces! Without your strong support, there is no way I would've EVER got this far! **

**This chapter is the beginning of the climax of the story where you will find most of everything out. It's a quite complicated plot, and I hope I made it seem believable, because I've been having a good deal of trouble with it. Anyway, that said, please, read, review, and above all else, enjoy! Two more chapters to go, baby! And then, of course, a chapter of thank-yous!**

* * *

"You know, you are MOST comforting in times of distress," I said breathlessly, attempting with little success to keep up with Draco's long strides as we hurried across the grounds of Hogwarts. 

"Look, I'm just trying to be blunt with you," he sighed, grabbing my hand and urging me on. "Come ON! Can't you walk a little bit faster?"

"I'm TRYING," I said through gritted teeth. "I'm just having some serious difficulties doing so with my two inch high heels on! AND this damn dress!"

"Then take it off," Draco shrugged. "And stop your bloody complaining!"

I was aghast.

"Look, buddy, if you mean to think that for one minute I'm going to _strip_ in front of you while the LOVE OF MY LIFE is in the clutches of that...that..."

"Foul, loathsome and awful creature?" Draco suggested.

"Yes, that was _exactly_ what I was looking for," I wheezed, increasing my pace even more. "Funny, I seem to remember saying that to YOU many years ago..."

"I'm really glad that you've formed a much more positive opinion of me over these past few months, Hermione," my companion said seriously. "You don't know how much I have really valued your friendship."

Bugger. That sounded like a good-bye speech if I had ever heard one. Then again, if we were walking straight into Voldemort's lair, as I suspected, it very well could be...

I was seriously questioning my sanity as we reached the outskirts of Hogwart's grounds. Why, oh WHY, for Merlin's sake, was I following DRACO MALFOY to certain death? Why hadn't I just told _Dumbledore_ about the disappearance of Ron and Cassandra? Why was I basically, by my own will, walking STRAIGHT into a trap?

One word answered my question: LOVE. I loved Ron so much that my heart literally ached. I refused to just sit back and let others do the job of rescuing him- _I _had to be there. And I had a suspicious feeling that that was EXACTLY Voldemort's intentions, and he was using Ron as the means to lure me there. And then...it dawned on me.

"HARRY!" I gasped, frantically tugging on Draco's silky robe sleeves. "Draco, we HAVE to go back! Harry MUST be warned! I know what's going on...Voldemort is going to use Ron and I as bait to capture Harry! You KNOW he'll rush after us to save the day- his two best mates! He loves us deeply. And that's EXACTLY what Voldemort wants, isn't it? To murder the Boy-Who-Lived, once and for all! And his two best friends, while he's at it!" I was beginning to become more than a smidgen hysterical. "And YOU! Why didn't you do anything to prevent this? Don't tell me you didn't know about this plan...you're practically in his inner circle..."

Draco answered with only two words.

"Trust me," he said shakily, before quickly grasping my hand and Apparating us to not just mine, but _our _doom. (I had a funny feeling that Voldemort had keen suspicions of a spy in his midst...especially since the sexy bloke kept on hinting at both HIS and my death).

* * *

"Here." Draco quickly replicated my wand and shrank the original. "Hide this somewhere in that dress of yours- how about your bosom? You sure as heck have enough cleavagethere to create a decent-sized valley...it'll be concealed well." 

I was too worried and scared for my life- and Ron's and Draco's, of course, to even give the scathing reply that his comment certainly deserved. I unceremoniously stuffed the wand in the middle of my bra.

"All right. The Dark Lord's hideout is up there." He pointed to a Gothicmansion around a ten-minute walk away. "I need you to play along with whatever I say, whatever I do..." He broke off, nodding his head meaningfully towards a tall, black-robe clad figure that was swiftly making his way towards us.

"Father, I have the Mudblood!" Draco announced triumphantly, violently pinning my wrists behind my back and grabbing the fake wand from my shaking hands.

"Excellent job, Draco," Lucius Malfoy said approvingly. "The Dark Lord will be VERY pleased."

It was time for the best acting of my whole entire life.

"You BASTARD!" I screamed at Draco. "You BETRAYED ME! All this time, you've just been PRETENDING to be my friend, PRETENDING to be on the side of good, PRETENDING that you actually CARED what happened to me! You kissed me. Held me. Danced with me. Tried to help me with my relationship problems. And now, THIS? I assumed that you would HELP me rescue Ron- maybe sneak me through the back door or something. But NOW I find out that YOU LIED to me and PLANNED on leading me STRAIGHT INTO A TRAP-AND MY DEATH? I HATE YOU! You SET ME UP!"

"Oh, she is a fiesty one, Draco," Lucius smirked, running an ice cold finger down my cheek. "It's a pity that the Dark Lord wishes to kill her- she could be SO much fun."

"Get of me, you..." I was cut off by a perfectly placed Silencing Charm by Draco.

"Draco, why did you do that?" Lucius asked silkily. "It was quite entertaining watching Granger get so worked up...the effects it has on her body are quite a turn-on. I do hope that the Dark Lord allows me to have my way with her before her death..."

I did the only thing any respecting, wandless, mute woman could do at the time- I kneed him VERY hard in the crotch.

* * *

"Ah, Miss Granger, it is WONDERFUL for you to grace us with your presence this fine evening," Voldemort drawled, his red eyes, well, _red. _"Cassandra, why don't you show our guest just who you really are?" 

"I know EXACTLY who she is," I spat as the bimbo sauntered towards me, rolling up one sleeve of her skintight red top that she'd obviously changed into. "She's a real bi--- of a Death Eater."

"Exactly," the Ice Princess smirked, the burnt black Dark Mark on her forearm looking even more pronounced against her flawless ivory skin. "Took you long enough to catch on."

"Well, I always knew you were a b----..." I was cut off by the most inconsiderate prodding of a slim wand at my throat.

"Enough talk, Hermione," Cassandra said sickeningly sweetly. "We have a little treat for you. Boys?"

I watched in utter disbelief as Rudolphus Lestrange and Augustus Rookwood, both burly men a good 35 years her senior, quickly obeyed her order and exited the room, obviously to get my "treat." Then my surprise disappeared when I realized that she'd probably slept with them multiple times...the little slag that she was.

"Ron!" I whimpered as my quite dirty, exhausted, and in obvious-pain love came into view. I could only imagine the number of times he had to endure the Crutascius Curse...

"Hermione," he said quietly, but with so much emotion poured into that one word that I practically weeped. "I love you."

"I love you too, Ron," I breathed, as the world disapperared for a few moments and all that existed was the object-of-my-affections and I. His dark blue eyes stared at me with an intensity I had never experienced before as he was able to conjure a small, genuine smile in my direction.

"Marry me, Hermione," he said hoarsely, the smile growing wider. "When all this madness is over, be my wife. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I _need _you."

"Oh, _Ron,_" I sobbed. "I will. I WILL marry you..."

"Oh, isn't this most touching," Cassandra sneered. Ron stared at her with the utmost loathing.

"Well, I bloody reckon it should be. You see, Cassandra, we have something you certainly don't. LOVE. And, correct me if I'm wrong, but you're JEALOUS of the bond that we share."

"Oh, I'm SUPER-jealous," the beautiful witch said sarcastically. "I really am. I have always desired to spend the rest of my life with a dirt-poor, lazy, unintelligent, daft, untalented, and all-around bothersome bloke who is crass at Quidditch and snogging."

"You take that back," I hissed. "You take that back right now..."

"Enough!" Voldemort drawled. "As amusing as this may be, I have other plans for the way to spend this December evening. And at the top of my list is to kill that bloody Potter boy, "Savior of the Wizarding World.""

"You won't be able to kill him," I said defiantly. "He escaped you four times, he can do it again. Only this time, he'll MURDER you first."

Voldemort began advancing on me like a hunter stalking his prey.

"Get away from her, you bas---" Ron screamed. The darkest wizard in a century merely silenced him with a _Crucio_.

"You have WAY to much faith in that arrogant little friend of yours," he said silkily, 3 inches away from my face. I fought the strong urge to wrinkle my nose. Merlin, did Voldemort have bad breath! Don't tell me someone as intelligent as him didn't know about the existence of Morishina's Magical Mouthwash...

"No, I most certainly don't." I crossed my shaking arms across my chest. "I just know that good always conquers evil, in the end. It's been that way for thousands of years." I really could not figure out where I was channeling all this courage from...

"You know, Mudblood, it certainly is a pity that you never chose to join us," Voldemort said almost regretfully. "You would've been SUCH and asset to the Dark side, with your intelligence, good looks, and courage."

Dear Godric. I was being..._complimented?_ By _Voldemort? _What was this world coming to? I was just about to open my mouth with a scathing reply when...

"Traitor! I smell a TRAITOR," Voldemort hissed, whirling away from me to face his assembled followers. "One of you standing here tonight, as I have suspected for a long time, means to betray me." A murmur broke out from the crowd of Death Eaters and they obviously tried to figure out just WHO the spy was...

"SILENCE!" Roared Voldemort. A malicious grin crossed his hideous features as he uttered one word: "**_MALFOY."_**

* * *

"Yes, my Lord?" Lucius Malfoy inquired confidently. 

Bad-Breath-Boy rolled his eyes so fast that all I could see were two pinpoints of red, bouncing up and down.

"Not you, Lucius," he sighed. "Your son."

"Draco has _only_ ever been loyal to you, my Lord," the elder Malfoy said firmly. "I can assure you of that."

"I don't recollect asking for your opinon. Draco, come over here. NOW!"

Draco swaggered over, as self-assured and arrogant as always. I could only imagine, however, the mortal terror that was racing through his body...

"Yes, my Lord?' He asked in a perfect imitation of my father.

"Please stick your hand down the Mudblood's dress and retrieve the wand that you have hidden there," the Dark Lord said lazily.

"Your Lordship, if there is ANYTHING down Granger's dress, I promise to you she put it there herself, without my knowledge," Draco said without batting a pale-blond eyelash.

"I didn't ask _who_ put it there. I simply want you to REACH in her cleavage and bring it out to ME!"

"As you wish, my Lord," Draco shrugged, with a slender hand invading the neckline of my dress. Bloody, this was awkward. But in a weird, perverted way, if felt kind of good...(having the attractive bloke's hand in near proximity to my boobs...teehee).

Draco obviously knew the game was up, because he presented the shrunken wand to Voldemort with a flourish.

"There. I betrayed you. Are you happy?"

I seemed to have missed Bad-Breath-Boy's reply because Cassandra had most rudely delivered quite the hard and possibly fatal blow to my head, throwing me into almost- immediate unconcsiousness. My last conscious, quite morbid thought was, "Well, at least this way I won't have to watch Ron and Draco die," before completely blacking out.

* * *

**A/N: Now, I know there may still be a LOT of confusion as to what exactly Voldemort had instructed Draco to do throughout the year with regards to Hermione, and what Cassandra's duties specifically were (although the latter should be quite easy to figure out) but I promise you any remaining questions will be answered in the next chapter.**

**Coming up next Saturday...**

**Will Hermione ever see Ron again in life?**

**Will the Order come in time to save the day?**

**Will Harry defeat Voldemort?**

**Will Draco be murdered?**

**etc, etc, blah blah blee blee...**

**:-) **

**Hope to see ya'll next weekend!**


	21. In Voldemort's Lair

**Hola! First off, I'd like to thank the 53 fantastic guys and gals who left such uplifting and wonderful comments on Chapter 20: FairyKisses (you ROCK!), aishteru, nycegurl, Angel-4rom-heaven, hplovesme, kitotterkat, lacatamar, Sing-my-heart-out, Nina-del-rio, unknownspecies, Darkmoonfang, rainydyz07, phunkymunky, SheSaysWhaa, quidditchgurl07, Lucy the Rat, MysteryALASKA, Eowyn Organa, fran, Lucy, xPussyWillowKittenx, '.'.'.JessIca'.'.'., Blackness Angel, Rachel, fruitkiss, Kitty Weasley KW, True Slytherin Witch, debbie, waterfaerie15, the-insufferable-know-it-all, Azu Luna, Ron Lover 2005, Ronluver13, ShuShakinUp, EponineWeasley, NicciBubbles, prettigrul7, ThePhantomIt14, aurora-sakura, Huggles4All, RandomSmirf13, Endless Potential, sailorstarryeyes, Lumos2000, SafetyXPins, AshEllie, rgluvr13, dancerrdw, weasleyandmoneylover, suckr4romance, The Lady Luthien, Ronsreallove, and last, but certainly not least, TrueBluePotterFan!**

**Since the end unfortunately is approaching quickly (I'd say 2 more chapters), I'm starting to think even more about what I'm going to do next! I REALLY need your honest opinions- the teachers' journal or the collection of fluffy one-shots? I have many ideas for either one, but whichever the majority of you- the readers- choose will be the one that I will write. **

**I'd like to dedicate this chapter to all my wonderful reviewers, both new and old! Your support is overwhelming...I never dreamed when I began this story thatit'd be so popular...ever singleone of you out there who have reviewed one or more chapters or even havejust read one or more chapters of this story I say to you...ROCK ON!**

**I now present to you Capitulo Numero Veinte y Uno. Read, review, and, above all else, enjoy:-)**

* * *

"Well well. Sleeping Beauty finally awakens." 

"I was not _asleep,_ for your information," I said crossly, gingerly fingering the ginormous bump on the back of my head. "I was _unconscious_. There is a rather large difference between the two."

"You were **_asleep_** for the past hour and forty-five minutes," Draco smirked. "And I do think we have more important things to discuss."

"Let me guess." I quickly took in my surroundings. "We're in a prison cell in the lowest dungeons of Bad-Breath Boy's hideout."

Draco nodded his fair head approvingly.

"Brilliant nickname, Hermione. Couldn't have put it better myself. There were SO many times that I was sorely tempted to throw that prat a bagful of Peppermint Toads..."

I giggled, imagining the expression on Voldemort's pale face after receiving that "gift." Then I sobered immediately, remembering the predicament we were in.

"Where's Ron?" I asked with no little guilt, for those should've certainly obviously been the FIRST words out of my mouth following my return to consciousness.

"Eh, somewhere around here," Draco shrugged, waving his hand vaguely.

"Somewhere around here doesn't cut it," I snapped.

"I sure as heck hope you're asking this in order to formulate an escape plan, since I am absolutely stumped concerning that.."

"I'm asking this because I am absolutely worried SICK about the love of my life," I informed the Slytherin angrily. "And if you don't tell me RIGHT now, I'm afraid I'll be forced to..."

"He's over there," Draco yawned, pointing to a prison cell across the room.

"Oh, _Ron,_" I cried, staring at the crumpled figure around three hundred feet away. I grasped the strong metal bars of our jail so tightly that my knuckles turned white. "What have they _done_ to you?"

"Took the Cruciatus a good ten times after you blacked out." Draco winced. "It's a miracle he's even alive."

"And the reason we're alive is..."

"Yet another thing you missed while you were _asleep. _The Dark Lord plans on enjoying the company of one Saint Potter quite soon and has some lovely plans that just so happen to include us. Until that cheery time, we have been thrown into this Godforsaken cell to ponder our last thoughts."

"Ponder our _last_ thoughts?" I asked with dread.

"He means to murder us, Hermione," Draco informed me hoarsely.

* * *

"I'm only 18!" I sobbed. "I'm too young to be murdered!" 

"I never said we were _going_ to be murdered," Draco sighed. "That is just his _intention._ Neither you, nor I, nor Ron, nor Harry should die this evening if all goes according to plan."

"Plan?"

"And they call you _clever._ Honestly, Hermione, you really think that Order would allow the Golden Trio- and I, their greatest spy- to walk to their deaths? I think not. There is a back-up plan. A bloody good one, if I say myself. I helped create it, by the way."

"I'm very proud of you. But if there is a so-called 'back-up' plan, why were you hoping so feverishly that I was going to think up some brilliant way of escaping our imprisonment?"

"Back-up plans can fail. Now, since we will be here for at least a half an hour longer, I reckon I should start at the beginning of the story..."

"That'd be good."

The handsome bloke took a deep breath, his musuclar chest expanding and contracting.

"Well, as you know, Cassandra is a Death Eater."

"Duh."

"I didn't ask for any comments, did I?"

"No."

"That's better. Anyway, she is the illegitimate daughter of Bellatrix Black. You know, that wonderful aunt of mine..."

"Eww...you tried to seduce your _first cousin_?"

"Well, I obviously didn't know she was my first cousin at the time. Do you remember what I said about making comments?"

"Sorry."

"Apology not accepted, but who gives a ----? So, Cassandra is the result of the Dark Lord, Aunt Bella, and too many Firewhiskeys."

DEAR MERLIN! My mind was going to be corrupted for DAYS! Scratch that, WEEKS! MONTHS! YEARS!

"But, as you see, I only learned that much much _later _in the year, because obviously neither Aunt Bella nor the Dark Lord wanted that information publicly known. Anyway, this past summer shewas introduced to the Death Eater circle as a young woman very skilled in Dark Magic and the bedroom. As you can probably guess, her popularity grew quite quickly and she was accepted and trusted immediately by the others. The Dark Lord..."

"Can you _please_ stop saying 'the Dark Lord'?" I asked politely. "Voldemort is a sick bast---, not a 'lord.'"

"Fine, fine. _Voldemort_ gave her an assignment right away- to pose as an exchange student at Hogwarts..."

"And this slipped past Dumbledore.._how?_"

"Because she actually did come from Beauxbatons, that's how. She'd gone there for the past six years. Anyhow, you can easily hypothesize what her exact job was..."

"To break Ron and I up," I said quietly. "To divide the Golden Trio. Then to lure Ron out here, which in turn would lure me, which in turn would lure Harry, which in turn..."

"Precisely."

"But how do YOU fit into this equation?"

"Eh, I scarcely had any role at all at first- for either the Death Eaters or the Order. You see, the main problem was that Voldemort suspected a traitor in his midst the whole time and had thus placed an extremely complicated charm on the whole plan in general. None of us could speak of it to those without the Dark Mark. We literally _could not_. We could hint, yes. But reveal the full outline? No. That's why I couldn't tell you Cassandra's true purpose for all those months."

"Er...I'm getting a smidgen confused here..."

"Anyway, I just _knew_ I had to do something subtly to try to keep her from breaking you two up..."

"You tried to seduce her. _Incestuously_, may I add..."

"May I add for the second time that this was before I knew of her true parentage? But unfortunately, as you know, that plan backfired miserably. And got me into some deep dragon dung, if you excusemy word choice. I had to think up an excuse- and fast!"

"You claimed that you were trying to gain my trust and befriend me," I said rather cleverly, if I say so myself. "And then in the end, betray me and lead me to my death."

"Exactly. You see, for the past four months Voldemort has been assuming that I revealed my involvement in the Order to you..."

"You're a double agent," I breathed. "Just like Snape."

"It's not THAT impressive," Draco shrugged. I still stared at him in awe, my opinion of him rising yet another ten percent, if that was possible. "But yes, I indeed am a double agent. And I was able to use that status to pull off this whole shiebang..."

All the pieces of the puzzle suddenly fit neatly together.

"So the whole time Voldemort thought you were doing it for _him."_ I said excitedly. "Being my friend, helping me save my relationship..."

"Simple, yet clever," Draco winked. "Oh, he had his supsicions. Cassandra too. She never trusted me- for a good reason, I reckon. But I am, pardon my lack of humility, a quite accomplished Occulmens. That saved me."

"But today..."

"Today was a self-sacrifice," Draco sighed heavily. "I knew that the second I walked in here there would be no way to hide what I had done. Betrayal would hang _so_ heavily in the air that good liar and mind-blocker or not, Voldemort would see right through me. That's why I hid the wand in your dress. I _knew_ he would discover it and just where my true allegiances lie.."

"That's very noble and everything," I said slowly. "But I don't understand..."

"You see, this frees _Snape_ up," Draco said cheerfully. "Voldemort knows there a spy in his midst, but since he's caught me, he has no reason to assume that Snape is anything but loyal. And, best of all, since the plan has been completed- bringing you and Ron to headquarters- he can speak of everything to Dumbledore and other key members of the Order. They'll be here any minute now. Voldemort thinks that Snape will be leading them in the front entrance where an ambush is set up. But, in reality, they'll be sneaking in the back door.The one only Death Eaters know about. The one...right over there."

* * *

I glanced over at the thick wooden door for the hundredth time. My companion was restlessly pacing around our prison. 

"They should've been here by now, those prats," he grumbled.

"It's not nice to call people names," came a familiar voice. "Especially your soon-to-be-rescuers."

"Tonks!" I smiled with relief.

"Hermione." She grinned. "Nice to see you. Alive, I may add."

"But not for long...unless you GET ME OUT OF HERE!"

"Relax, Hermione," Harry said soothingly as Professor Dumbledore went to work on the extremely complicated locking charm on our cell and Mad-Eye Moody on Ron's. "Everything will be alright."

Everything will be alright," I whispered softly as I tightly held the wand Bill handed me with one hand and Ron's cold hand in the other (a Healing Charm had done wonders, but he was still quite shaky)as we followed the thirty-some Order members into what would soonbecome the most horrifying time in my- our-life.


	22. Of the Final Battle

**Woot! First off, I'd like to thank the following fabulous guys and gals who left such fabulous reviews on Chapter 21: FairyKisses, The other Marauder, manitcse2005, Rachel, Sing-my-heart-out, hplovesme, Azu Luna, muchishspazzish, rgluvr13, Ronsreallove, unknownspecies, NicciBubbles, aishteru, Huggles4All, laura truewood, xPussyWillowKittenx, Blackness Angel, kat6528, weasleyandmoneylover, rainydyz07, Ron Lover 2005, skysongscry, The Lady Luthien, Lumos2000, the-insufferable-know-it-all, Angel-4rom-heaven, debbie, SafetyXPins, Lucy, dancerrdw, Darkmoonfang, AmyChris, doublelily, suckr4romance, Endless Potential, ThePhantomIt14, Eowyn Organa, Nina-del-rio, EponineWeasley, AshEllie, and last, but certainly not least, Phillyactress.**

**I know that over the past few weeks the writing quality of each chapter has been declining, and I apologize profusely for that. Since school has started, with all the homework, stress, and activities, writing this fic has almost become somewhat of a chore. Fortunately, this chapter was an exception- I had such fun writing it and the words just flowed out of me! I hope this makes up for the pathetic chapters I've been cranking out. Again, I truly am sorry, and I thank all you loyal reviewers who have stuck by me and kept faith in medoubly, because there's a half-decent amount of individuals who didn't. And I don't blame them. :-(**

**Well, there's only one more chapter to go after this. It's obviously depressing for me, since this story has been such a huge part of my life since- _MAY?_ Merlin, that's a long time! Anyway, I am rather looking forward to starting something new because, as you know, after a while, everything eventually starts to become dry and boring. Now, I know this sounds terrible to say, because I said that I would write what the majority of ya'll would like, which I do believe is the collection of one-shots, but I feel "out-romanced," from readingSOOmany "Ron and Hermione getting together" fics recently and, of course, writing this fic, if you know what I mean...I really don't know if I would enjoy doing fluffy one-shot after fluffy one-shot at this time- so as of now, I'm semi-leaning towards the teachers' journals or something else.Ihope you all understand what I'm saying...the idea's just kind of getting old at the moment.Perhaps in a month or two I'll feel more inspired to puruse that idea.I really don't know. So, either way, will you guys support me and enjoy my next story?**

**I now present to you the second-to-last chapter in this story. Read, review, and above all else, ENJOY! (By the way, if you received a second Author's Alert in your mailbox, it's because a few reviewers pointed out some major mistakes in this chapter and I found some of my own. And, being the perfectionist that I am, I had to fix them and replace the old chapter with my new and improved one!)**

**Note: It may start out a smidgen slow, but TRUST ME- it gets better. This chapter is entitled "Of the Final Battle," after all :-)**

* * *

"Split up. Quickly!" Mad-Eye Moody ordered as we continued our ascent to the upper levels of the mansion. Ron and I shared a questioning look. 

"Potter, you will be coming with me, Severus, Albus, Tonks, and Remus. Granger, Weasley, and Malfoy, you're going with everyone else."

I knew exactly what was going on.

"No," I said quietly, yet firmly. "I refuse to."

Harry looked at me pleadingly.

"Hermione, I will never be able to live with myself if anything happens to you or Ron."

"We have just as good of a chance getting killed if we battle with the Death Eaters," I said stubbornly.

"You're not facing Voldemort without us, mate," Ron added with a scowl.

"Yes, I bloody am," Harry hissed. "And don't try to change my mind."

"_They're_ going with you," I pointed to Lupin, Tonks, Dumbledore, and Mad-Eye Moody.

"Because they _volunteered_ to!"

"We're volunteering too, Harry," I said gently.

"Potter," Moody said gruffly. "Listen to your friends."

Harry did not lose the determined look on his face.

"You two are NOT coming with me." The Boy-Who-Lived said with an air of finality.

I knew exactly what the problem was. Ron and I were the two most important people in Harry's life, hands down. Well, and Ginny. And although he was quite fond of Tonks, Dumbledore, and Mad-Eye Moody- and extremely tight with Lupin- none of those relationships came even close to matching the ones that he, I, and Ron shared.

"Tell Ginny I love her," Harry said quietly, his voice breaking slightly.

"You can tell her that when you return, victorious, that sodding bas---- wiped off the face of the Earth," Ron said firmly. "With us by your side."

"I'll put it this way, Harry, either you allow us to go with you or I'll hex you into oblivion." I added cleverly.

"I'll put it this way, children- if you don't stop your bothersome quarreling, none of you will live to face Voldemort," Draco drawled.

"You mean...Death Eaters are headed this way?"

Draco rolled his eyes.

"Well, that too Weasley, seeing as we are in the _Dark Lord's lair._ However, I was referring to the fact that in about five seconds I am going to MURDER all three of you with _a single curse_ if you don't _shut the heck up_!"

"Well, _I'm_ going to murder you..."

"This is _precisely_ why I never supported having teenagers participate in missions," Moody grumbled. "Too damn temperamental and emotional."

"You're calling _me_ temperamental?" Draco asked, disbelief written all over his fair face.

"I rather agree with Mad-Eye..."

I was opening my mouth to make a rather clever addition to the discussion that was unfolding, but I discovered that...

The gestures that Snape and Draco were making demonstrated that I was not the only one to have lost my capability to speak.

"That's better," Dumbledore said quietly. "We are putting our plan into action NOW. This arguing is getting us nowhere _whatsoever. _Harry, you WILL let Miss Granger and Mr.Weasley accompany you if you wish to continuing being the Boy-Who-Lived, as opposed to the Boy-Who-Died."

After lifting the very powerful _Silencio_ that had, well, silenced the thirty-some of us, and following many tearful good-byes, we were on our ever-so merry way.

* * *

"Well, this is it," Snape said unnecessarily, pausing in front of an ornately carved wooden door, decorated with MANY quite realistic-looking snakes. Figures. Voldemort REALLY needed to get over his rather unhealthy obsession with that reptile... 

"This is it," I whispered, squeezing Ron's hand extra hard and giving him a quick peck on the lips. Quick, but nevertheless demonstrating to him how sorry I was for my actions of the previous months and how strong my love was for him.

"Er- wait a second, Professor," Harry said anxiously. "How do we know that there's not a whole roomful of Death Eaters waiting in there, ready to kill us?"

"The Death Eaters are far, far away from here, Potter," Snape smirked. "Waiting for me to lead the Order through the front door and into the ambush. Salazar, will they be surprised! The only ones in this room are the Dark Lord, my dear classmate Bellatrix, Malfoy, and the lovely Cassandra Valet. I do think we can take them on, wouldn't you agree?"

"Definitely, Professor," a familiar voice firmly agreed.

"Do you have a death wish, Draco?" Snape snapped. "You know damn well that the Dark Lord is VERY displeased with you at the moment."

"_I _just so happen to be one of the best duelers the Order has," Draco boasted, running a slender hand through his silky blonde hair arrogantly. "And I happen to know the fighting styles of the four wonderful individuals who we will be making acquaintance with quite shortly very well. I shall be an enormous asset. And, may I add, I fear neither pain nor death."

"Your funeral," Snape shrugged, kicking the door open. "And please wait for my signal."

* * *

"Ah, Severus. How wonderful of you to join us. Lucius and I were just discussing how Draco was able to carry off this clever plot of his without your knowledge. Fascinating, really." 

"Perhaps he had my knowledge- and help," we heard Snape say calmly, inciting a deep unison gasp from the other occupants of the room. Voldemort, however, was just sitting there calmly. Perhaps he had already established that particular fact, seeing as he was omnipotent AND by the fact that Snape was with him now, rather than leading the Order to their death.

"You, Severus?" Lucius asked weakly. "I always thought that you..."

"Well, you thought wrong, Lucius, old pal," Snape chuckled. "As you didconcerning your son..."

"Draco," the elder Malfoy spat out as if the word was poison. "I no longer consider Draco my son. A real son would..."

"Stun his git of a father," Draco finished, well, _stunning_ the Death Eater with a quick swish of his wand.

"Impressive, nephew, dear," Bellatrix sneered. "But just how good are you at jinxing someone who is NOT caught unaware?" Wands flashing faster than the eye could see, the two top-notch duelists shot stream after stream of deadly green, red, and purple light at each other, fighting with such skill, passion, and _vengeance._

"Now!" Professor Dumbledore whispered as the remaining six of us flooded Voldemort's chambers. Tonks and Mad-Eye led the way, then Ron and I, then Harry, and then himself.

And so began the Final Battle. The batlle that would decide the fate of Harry Potter. The battle that wuld decide the fate of mankind. The fate of the world.

* * *

"You know, that hair of yours is _quite_ atrocious," Cassandra wrinkled her nose as she viewed Tonks's electric pink hair with obvious disgust. 

"I'd say the same to you," Tonks said cheerfully, dodging an _Avada Kedavra_. "But I know you simply can't help it. I, on the other hand, _can._" Within seconds, her hair was a beautiful deep red.

"I hate to compliment the person I am about to kill, but that is a rather awesome skill to possess," Cassandra said grudgingly.

"Why, thank you," Tonks coughed, after the wind was knocked out of her by a curse of Lucius Malfoy.

Cassandra took this as an excellent opportunity to finish the young Auror off once and for all.

"_Avada--_"

"_Kedavra,"_ Rnon finished, ending the life of the person I despised most after Voldemort.

"Bloody hell!" Ron said in complete and utter shock. "I just _killed_ someone!"

"_And_ you happened to save the life of one Nymphadora Tonks." I pointed out, hitting Bella in the back with a _Stupefy._

"Thanks, Hermione," Draco mouthed, before turning his wand on his aunt.Who had most unfortunately been _Eneverated _by one very, very, VERY unhappy Lord Voldemort.

"You killed our daughter," Voldemort and Bella hissed in unison, advancing on Ron. "And now we shall return the favor."

Then it seemed as though everything was happening in slow motion.

"You'll have to get through me first," Harry snarled, somehow appearing in front of us from (he'd been across the room just mere seconds ago where he and Dumbledore had been dueling Bad-Breath-Boy.).

"Harry, _move._ NOW!" Ron sreamed.

"No. I refuse to," Harry said stubbornly. "I will not let you two die because of ME. Because you, seven years ago, chose to be friends with ME."

"Harry, your life is worth SO much more than ours," I shrieked. "Stop being so foolishly noble and bloody get OUT OF THE WAY!" Out of the corner of my eye, I could see that Moody, Draco,Tonks, Snape, and Dumbledore were doing their very best to make their way over, but Lucius Malfoy had somehow created some ridiculously strong, impermeablewards around us, keeping theOrder outand us in.

"Potter's life is worth _nothing_," Voldemort chuckled. "Neither are yours."

"I would certainly have to agree, my Lord." Draco's father smiled wickedly. "So, why don't we just do away with them right now."

"NOW!" I squeezed Ron's hand and the three of us simultaneously shot Killing Curses towards our captors. Only problem was, Voldemort had the same idea. And I watched, in horror, as the stream of green light approached Harry. AndI watched, in even greater horror, asRon leapt out in front of his best mate, in an attempt to save him and take death for himself. And that was the last thing I remembered before I felt myself blacking out for the second time in the evening.

* * *

"Look! Her hand just moved! She's waking up!" 

"I think that was just a figment of your imagination, Gin."

"Are you insinuating that I can't separate reality from truth?"

"Sometimes, yes," the masculine voice pointed out.

"Why, I oughta..."

"It's not nice to make threats, Ginny," I croaked out, attempting to open my eyes. Unfortunately, it felt like two extremely heavy lead weights were attached to my eyelids. I groaned.

"Oh, bless you, you're alive! Madame Pomfrey, come over here. QUICK!"

I heard an incantation of some sort of healing spell, and then I felt the pressure on my eyes recede. Tenatively, I opened them to the quite relieved faces of Ginny, Mrs. Weasley, Madame Pomfrey, Fred, George, Bill, Charlie, Tonks, Dumbledore, and _Snape?_

I swore very loudly under my breath as memories of what took place before my blackout came rushing back into my head at alarming speeds.

"Ron," I said hoarsely, fearing the worst. "Where's Ron? And Harry? And Draco?"

"Ron's fine, Hermione,"Ginny saidsoothingly. "He's sleeping, over there." She gestured towards the infirmary bed to the right of mine. Sure enough, the love of my life was lying there, fast asleep, a peaceful expression on his handsome face.

I felt such deep relief that I do believe I almost fainted dead-away for yet a third time.

"But _what happened?"_ I asked weakly, slowly sitting up. "The last thing I remember is Ron jumping in front of Harry to save his life and- and-" I was having great difficulty finishing the sentence without breaking into tears, "take death for himself." That was the ultimate sacrifice, hands down. And the love of my life- the man I was going to spend the rest of my life with- had been prepared to do it, without a second of hesitation.

"We fortunately broke through the wards, just in time," Professor Dumbledore sighed. "I was able to conjure a powerful shield around the three of you at the last second. The curse harmlessly bounced off."

"And then I finished that bas---- off, once and for all," a familiar voice finished.

"Harry, oh _Harry!"_ I weeped, somehow finding enough energy and strength to leap out of bed and into his fierce embrace.

"Well, if this is the reception I get every time I kill a Dark Lord, I reckon I'll have to do it more often," Harry joked.

"Oh, _Harry! _It's all over now! You prevailed. The side of Good prevailed. Voldemort is no more! You- we- can all live normal lives now, ones free from evil, free from concern, free from fear of death! And it's all because of _you!" _

"Hey, hey, don't give _me_ all the credit," Harry said lightly. "There's no way I could've done it without you, Ron,..." His voice broke slightly at the mention of his best mate, and I could tell that he was desperately fighting back tears. "And the rest of the Order."

I really hated to ask this question, but it was something I desperately needed to know.

"Er, where there any casualties on our side?" I asked, mentally bracing myself for the worst.

A significant look seemed to pass among the witches and wizards clustered around my bed.

* * *

"We gather here today not to mourn the death of those three oustanding individuals who unselfishly gave up their lives in the batle to eradicate evil, but to celebrate their lives." 

Mad-Eye Moody limped up to the podium first.

"Kingsley Shacklebolt was like no other man," he said gruffly. "Courageous beyond belief and always willing to join in the fight, without a moment's hesitation. I'll never forget what he said to me right before the Final Battle-'Alastor, I have a feeling that I'll die tonight. But I am not afraid. I do not fear the ending of my life, for death is but the beginning of another adventure.' He was a wonderful husband to Aretha, a loving father to Tyron, and a friend to many. He wasone of the best Aurors on our force, and will be missed greatly by all."

"I've had the pleasure of working with Filius Flitwick for over twenty-five years," Professor McGonagall said in a quivering voice. "He had such a passion for teaching- he literally bounced out of bed each morning, eagerly looking forward to teaching young witches and wizards the Charms created by the warlocks of old. He possessed unbelievable optimism and enthusiasm for each new day, and will be missed greatly by those who were fortunate enough to call him their colleague, profesor,or friend." I watched as the sobbing Transfiguration Professor returned to her seat, her husband, Murdo, placing a comforting arm around her shaking shoulders. I took a deep breath and rose to my feet.

"For the first six years of my life, Draco Malfoy was the bane of my existence," I said softly, looking to my fiance for support. He nodded his head slightly and gave me the strength to go on. "However, at the beginning of this year, it all changed. As you know, he confided his true loyalties to me and offered to help keep Cassandra from getting her claws in Ron. That was the beginning of a wonderful friendship. Now, I certainly do regret some things about our relationship, especially since it was that that partially tore Ron and I apart, but one thing I do not regret is having the opportunity to spend time with this wonderful young man and the friendship itself. Draco was clever, witty, intelligent, talented, caring, thoughtful, and brave beyond belief. For many months he played a double-agent role, risking his very existence every day. Now, I know that many of you never had the chance to catch a glimpse of the real, true, _good_ Draco Malfoy, but I assure you that if you had, you would certainly miss him and much as I will. Draco truly is a hero." And with that, I could go on no further. I broke down into uncontrollable sobs and fell into the waiting arms of one Ronald Weasley.

* * *

"To Filius, Kingsley, and Draco." Dumbledore raised his goblet solemnly at the funeral feast later that evening. "May we always remember the ultimate sacrifice that each performed, without hesitation or regret." 

"And may we also pay tribute to the one young man who ended this evil once and for all," Snape added, suprising about 99.9 percent of the occupants of the Great Hall. "Harry Potter. To the Boy-Who-Lived, I raise my goblet."

I smiled as I later watched Harry firmly shake the Potion Master's hand, without anger or scorn.

"Isn't it wonderful how things have tunred out?" I sighed, holding one of Ron's strong, large hands in both of my own.

"Yeah, I reckon it is," Ron smiled nervously, the tips of his ears turning red.

"What's wrong?" I furrowed my brow.

"Er...well...bloody, this is hard...well, er..."

"Just _say it, _Ron," I urged him on.

To my shock- but pleasant shock, he dropped down onto one knee and pulled a small jewelry box out of his pocket.

"Er, Hermione, I asked you this before, but I want to do it properly. Er...willyoumarryme.?"

"We didn't catch that, Ronald!" Fred smiled wickedly. "Could you please repeat it, only a bit more clearly this time?"

With the eyes of the three-hundred some people in the Great Hall on us, he took a deep breath, face as red as a tomato.

"For seven years, Hermione, we've been the best of friends. For seven years, I've loved you and held you close to my heart. Without you, my life is nothing. Marry me, Hermione. There is nothing in all of Merlin's world that could making me happier than having you as my wife."

I pretended to contemplate it for a moment, even though he knew darn well what my answer was going to be.

"I always had problems saying no to you," I sighed, before meeting my lips to his in the sweetest kiss we had ever shared.

* * *

**Coming up next week: The final chapter in this story...the WEDDING!**


	23. The Wedding!

**Merlin, Merlin, MERLIN! Close to 70 reviews! That's UNBELIEVABLE! Thank you SO much to the following wonderful reviewers of Chapter 22, many of them who have been with me since day one of this story- and through "Battle of the Hearts" too: debbie, SilentRaven987, MIDNIGHT-PIXIE, Khdude, Zarroc, '.'.'.JessIca'.'.'., Azu Luna, the-insufferable-know-it-all, FairyKisses, skysongscry, ThePhantomIt14, rainydyz07, Darkmoonfang, prettigurl7, ShadowHexx771, CassieLupin, sccrchick1432, NotThePoke, Rozie, Huggles4All, EponineWeasley, skittles-equal-life, aishteru, xPussyWillowKittenx, Rachel, laura truewood, Blackness Angel, EvilKidSonicGurl, Loku, nycegurl, SleepyHead22, Ron Lover 2005, Ronluver13, AshEllie, xox.AnniePotter.xox, unknownspecies, mim, hplovesme, CamelKatie, Aqb Dk, Elise, kitotterkat, keeny, True Slytherin Witch, SafetyXPins, aurora-sakura, suckr4romance, ladyro7, mAlFoYiSaWeSoMe, Lady Smoothie, Sing-my-heart-out, Nina-del-rio, sophisticatedfunk, sailorstarryeyes, TrueBluePotterFan, NicciBubbles, shmoogybear, doublelily, Ronsreallove, Eowyn Organa, dancerrdw, Lumos2000, Lucy, weasleyandmoneylover, and last, but certainly not least, Galadriel Evenstar. Thanks to all who have ever reviewed this story in the past too! I'd love to express my gratitude to each and everyone one of you through words, but I've heard that they're really cracking down on stories that have Author Notes as separate chapters, so...apologies... I won't be able to do what I did for Battle of the Hearts.**

**Wow. This is the absolute final chapter of Looks Can Be Deceiving. How do I feel about this? Certainly a bit depressed about it ending, worried about leaving the security of this story, and happy...? I LOVED writing this story and receiving SO much positive feedback from ya'll- don't get me wrong- but I think it's time for a change. I'm extremely excited about my next endeavor in the world of fanfiction! Which, at the moment, I'm still not one hundred percent sure about. So, there is a fairly good chance that I will NOT be posting next Saturday. I need to really get my thoughts together and plan my new story out, and then writing a compelling first chapter that will hook the attention of readers. For me, there is no way I'll be able to do that in a week. Also, I think it's time to take a break, take a breather- even if it's just for one weekend. I hope you guys all understand...Saturday, October 29th there WILL be Chapter 1 of my next story, whatever it will be. And I sincerely hope that each and every one of you stick with me and contiue to be such awesome, fabulous, and wonderful reviewers!**

**Warning: This chapter contains a larger amount of sexual innuendos than usual. There is NOTHING close to explicit- you guys know I never write things like that. However, I just felt you ought to be warned. It's nothing _too_ bad by any means...well, read on and you'll see!**

**I now present to you Chapter 23, the last chapter of this story. Read, review, and above all else, enjoy. I shall see you all, at the latest, on October 29th with Chapter 1 of my new story!**

* * *

"Ginny, I _can't do this!"_ I cried eight months later. "I simply _can't."_

"Hermione, Draco didn't sacrifice his life for yours so you could live to be an old spinster," Ginny said impatiently, scrutinizing my face from every angle. "And I think you need a smidgen more eye shadow on your right eye."

Unexpected tears came to my eyes at the mention of Draco's name. A week after the Final Battle, Ron had broken it gently to me that after I'd fainted, Draco had assumed the role of protector of my body as the Final Duel raged on. He'd died by his father's wand.

_"Move, DRACO," Lucius snarled. "Get away from that filthy Mudblood, or else I will be forced to kill both her and YOU!"_

_"You bas---," Draco hissed. "I refuse to move even an inch. Kill me, if you must. Hermione deserves to live more than I do."_

_And, for the first time in his life, Lucius Malfoy obeyed his son's wishes._

"Merlin, Ginny, did you _really_ have to mention that on my Wedding Day?" I sniffed. "You really know how to put a damper on a girl's spirits!"

"I was just pointing it out," Ginny shrugged.

"But honestly, Gin, don't you think I'm a little too young to be married?"

"My mum was 18, Hermione. You're nearly 19."

"I mean, _really._ What was I thinking when I said yes?"

Ginny stopped fussing with my make-up and stared at me straight in the eye.

"Girl, what _is_ your problem?"

"Oh, it's just the typical bride's pre-wedding jitters, I reckon," I said lamely.

"No, it's certainly not." Her big brown eyes narrowed and she suddenly smirked. "Oh, I know what it is..."

"Well, what is it?" I asked nonchalantly, adjusting my veil in a nearby mirror.

"_You're worried about your wedding night,"_ Ginny whispered, smiling most wickedly.

"I most certainly am NOT," I retorted hotly, a deep blush rising on my face despite myself. For, obviously, she had spoken the truth.

"Oh, _yes you are._ Fleur was the same way before her wedding," Ginny remarked casually.

I literally choked on the mint I'd popped in my mouth to calm my nerves.

"Are we talking about the same Fleur? _Fleur Delacour?"_

"Yes, _Fleur Delacour,"_ Ginny snickered. "You should've heard the way she was going on and on..."

"B-but she always sounded _so_ confident about things like that!" I stuttered.

"The French can be rather good at acting."

"Seriously, Gin, how I am going to know what to _DO?"_ I wailed in anguish.

"You, the cleverest witch at Hogwarts, should very easily be able to figure that one out. Would you like me to draw you a diagram?"

I gave her the dirtiest glare I could muster, under the circumstances. Then my panic returned full-fledged.

"Merlin, Ginny, he's going to see me NAKED!" I said in a tortured voice, burying my face in my hands.

"Who's going to see you naked, Hermione?" Professor McGonagall asked from the doorway with a chuckle. My eyes lit up.

"Minerva! It's so good to see you." I gave the older woman a large hug. For the remaining half a year after the Final Battle, our friendship had blossomed quite rapidly at Hogwarts, and it was one I certainly treasured deeply.

"My dear brother is, of course," Ginny said in a bored sort of tone, filing a raggedy nail. "And she..." she pointed her nail file accusingly in my direction "is _way_ too worked up about it. It's just _Ron,_ for Godric's sake!"

"How would you feel if Harry was going to...?"

"Enough, you two," Minerva interrupted, a twinkle in her pale blue eyes. "Ginny, it is perfectly normal for a witch to be panicking about what happens the night after her wedding. Trust me. No matter how well she knows the bloke- which, in Hermione's case, is seven years."

"B-but..." Merlin, this was embarrassing. "W-what if he doesn't like what he sees?"

"Hermione, your husband will not be able to take his eyes off of you," the older witch smiled. "I promise you that."

"B-but..."

"No ifs, ands, or buts. Now, Hermione, I am quickly going to give you one piece of sound advice that, if followed, will give you a blissful and worry-free honeymoon."

"_What?"_ I waited with bated breath.

"Just follow your instincts. Now, please be honest with me- have you and Ron ever had difficulty restraining yourselves from engaging in activities of an inappropriate nature?"

"Hell yes." I snorted, covering my mouth with a hand a few seconds later. Bloody. I'd just sworn! In front of Minerva McGonagall!

Far from glaring at me disapprovingly or opening her mouth to give a reprimand, my old Transfiguration professor merely smirked.

"Then, tonight, just allow your heated passion to take over," she winked. "It may be awkward at first, but _trust me,_ once you get into the groove of things, there is little in the way of problems. Except for..." And the least likely woman I EVER expected to give me advice about shagging proceeded to share some quite enlightening things with me that my own mother and soon to be mother-in-law had neglected to tell me...

* * *

"I can't do this, mate." Ron groaned, throwing his royal blue tie to the ground. 

"That tie giving you trouble again?" Harry raised an eyebrow. "Here, I'll help you. But you really do need to learn how to do this for yourself, mate. Do you want to have to ask Hermione to tie your tie _every time_ you attend a formal function?"

"Don't mention her name," Ron said weakly, turning green around the gills as he stared miserably at his reflection in the mirror.

"Well, seeing as she's going to be your wife in two hours and thirty five minutes, I honestly thought it would be alright if I spoke her name," Harry furrowed his brow. "Which you will be doing quite often tonight, if I'm not mistaken. Although 'moaning' or 'groaning' might be a better verb to use..."

"Sod off, Harry," the youngest Weasley grumbled, attempting to flatten down his vivid hair with no avail, as usual.

"Ah, I see I've hit a quite sensitive spot." Harry wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. "Is there something you'd like to talk about?"

Ron turned a shade of red that his soon-to-be wife would have certainly found most adorable.

"Tonight, Harry," he whispered. "I-I-I'm n-nervous about it."

"Never fear! Fred, George, Charlie, Bill, and Percy are here!" Forge trilled, kicking the door to Ron's bedroom open and waltzing in.

"Pre-Honeymoon Counseling Service, at your service." Gred bowed.

"Now, I seem to get the feeling for some odd reason that you're concerned about some particular aspects of your wedding night," Charlie grinned widely.

"Er-ah-yeah..."

Twenty minutes later, Ronald Weasley was absolutely positive that if given a test on a **_certain topic_**, he'd pass it with flying colors. His dear older brothers had used everything from diagrams to stories of personal experiences to enrich his mind with tons of information he hoped would prove to be EXTREMELY useful after sunset...

* * *

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. Ronald, you may kiss the bride." 

"I love you more than life itself," my husband breathed huskily into my ear, before meeting my lips with his in a sizzling kiss.

"Even Quidditch?" I inquired as we shared the first dance of the reception.

"Even Quidditch," he confirmed, brushing a light kiss against my forehead.

"Congratulations, you two!" Luna said shyly, walking over with Neville in tow.

"Thanks, Luna!" I said happily. It was then that I noticed a beautiful diamond ring...

"Oh my WORD! You're getting _married!"_ I squealed, unable to contain my girly excitement.

"Well, not right away," Neville blushed. "We're obviously going to wait until Luna finishes her schooling. We're planning on having the wedding around August 15th of next year."

"Oh, that's _perfect!"_ I sighed dreamily. "I can't _wait_ for the wedding. We're invited, right?"

Luna rolled her eyes.

"Obviously, Hermione," she giggled. "You and Ronald are first on our guest list!"

I gave her a warm hug.

"We're really going to have to get together one of these days and catch up over a cup of tea," I pointed out.

"Definitely..." Our conversation was interrupted by Ron's frantic tugging on my arm.

"Yes, _Ronald?"_ I asked sweetly, a smidgen irritated at my conversation with Luna being ended so rudely. But any anger towards Ron dissolved when I saw just why he was trying to get my attention...

* * *

"Ginny, you know I love you. I've always loved you, even though I wasn't always aware of it. Marry me, Ginny. Wake up every morning, next to me in bed. I want your beautiful faceto be thelast thing I see before I fall asleep at night. Marry me, Ginny. We can spend the rest of our lives in bliss, loving and being with each other. Marry me. I love you more than you could comprehend." 

Ginny just stared at her boyfriend, her mouth opening and closing soundlessly.

"Harry, I'm not even seventeen yet!"

"Gin, this is a yes or no question." Harry laughed nervously. "I know this seems rather sudden..."

"But, you didn't let me finish my sentence," Ginny smiled angelically, breaking off his thought. "If you promise that we won't get married _until _I finish myschooling at Hogwarts, then I would definitely say yes. I love you, Harry."

"You definitely have yourself a deal, the soon-to-be Mrs. Potter," Harry beamed, before sweeping his fiancé off her feet and into a passionate embrace.

"Well, Molly, it looks like you'll be planning another wedding in the near future," Tonks said cheerfully. "Going through the stress and anxiety again in less than a year!"

My mother-in-law wiped the tears that were streaming down her cheeks with a crisp handkerchief her husband handed her.

"I'm bloody happy about that, to be honest," she said in a choked voice.

* * *

"Well, well, well. Alone at last," Ron said huskily. 

"Alone at last," I echoed meekly.

"What's wrong, Hermione?" Ron asked, running a strong, calloused hand over my cheek. I melted into his electrifying, yet soothing touch.

"Oh, er, it's nothing," I stammered.

"No, it's NOT nothing," he said firmly. "C'mon, Hermione, you know I hate it when you keep secrets from me..."

"Fine!" I took a deep breath. This was going to be EXTREMELY mortifying. "I'm worried about consummating our marriage, okay?"

"Oh, you _certainly_ have a reason to be worried, love," my handsome husband said seductively, licking his lips. Those wicked lips that were about to wreak havoc on my senses...

I took a frightened step backwards. And then another. And another. However, I realized, with horror, that Ron was taking even larger steps. Only in a forward direction. Towards me. I swallowed hard as I felt the hardness of the wall of the luxurious hotel room we were staying in connect with my back.

"Scared, love?" Ron whispered as he pressed his body up against mine, pinning my hands above my head. I absolutely _shivered. "_You should be, because I'm about to ravish your body until you can scarcely move..."

"Eeeep.." I managed to croak before his lips slammed into mine, with the most aggressive, passionate, and pleasurable kiss I'd ever received in my life. Kiss, after kiss, after kiss...I began drowning in the unbelievingably wonderful sensations- and the not wholly unfamiliar, but stronger than usual feelings in certain parts of my body. My last coherent thought was, 'perhaps Minerva was right with her advice,' before...well, there's no need to go into explicit details. Use your imagination.

Many, many, many MANY hours later, as I was drifting off to sleep after the _extremely_ tiring activities of the evening, I snuggled up as close to Ron as I could possibly get and said, quite, sleepily...

"Ron?"

"Yes, love?"

"You're a damn good kisser."

* * *

**THE END! **


End file.
